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Stephen Bean Vote score: 6823Stephen Bean

"My friends say I've changed since I started captioning."

12/02/20 13:03:39

 
GeeDee Vote score: 2818GeeDee

Hey,I'll have a Babycham

12/02/20 13:10:42

 
Boycie Vote score: 6698Boycie

Prince Harry revelled in his new-found freedom to wear that he liked.

12/02/20 13:57:09

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8151Chris Keegan

I do think ‘This Morning’ has taken on a new edge since his announcement last week.

12/02/20 13:15:59

 
The Wolf Vote score: 5965The Wolf

"Finally! Nice to meet you Anon"

12/02/20 12:04:28

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8151Chris Keegan

Well Zain, I’m pleased to inform you that you’ve passed your interview with Uber, can you start Monday?

12/02/20 12:00:41

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 477Mark Wilson

Drunken friend + Permanent Marker = Good times

12/02/20 20:39:05

 
stone face Vote score: 6763stone face

Poor dyslexic Joey. Once again he misread the memo, reminding everyone about Secret Santa.

12/02/20 12:09:38

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 7350Dave Bryan

''He's OK but to be perfectly honest I thought he was better with Orville.''

12/02/20 15:29:37

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 8638Mr Dome

I hated the 1980s

12/02/20 12:44:54

 
The Wolf Vote score: 5965The Wolf

“Dad, meet my new boyfriend…”

12/02/20 12:00:08

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 6210Hercules Rockefeller

Santeria Claus

12/02/20 12:05:18

 
The Wolf Vote score: 5965The Wolf

Meanwhile, in the basement at Downing Street, Boris was consulting with his spiritual advisor on how to take the country forward.

12/02/20 12:00:28

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6108Glyn Evans

"I only joined the cult because I wanted to find out which Quality Street was painted on his head."

12/02/20 21:23:19

 
J Gaskill Vote score: 94J Gaskill

“You’re home early! How did your date go!?”
“It was okay... He looked nothing like his profile I showed you. And I didn’t expect him to wear a tie and slacks, or to be chivalrous like some sort of pansy.”
“Oh wow... prick move....”
“Yep. TOTAL catfish.”

12/02/20 17:51:40

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 10327Vanessa the Guesser

"What kind of haircut is that??"
"The Beelzebob."

12/02/20 17:48:56

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 7350Dave Bryan

''I'm glad we left. I can't stand the French.''

12/02/20 16:28:29

 
Rachel P Vote score: 633Rachel P

Haircut 100 bc

12/02/20 15:53:56

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19929John Glover

"What do you mean, if I want the job at the children's day centre I'll have to get my hair cut!"

12/02/20 12:51:54

 
Dev B Vote score: 503Dev B

Shyamalan was hardly surprised to see his son turn out like that

12/02/20 12:40:13

 
The Wolf Vote score: 5965The Wolf

"Dave, before you look in the mirror and freak out, I should tell you that your Stag do yesterday went a bit crazy. Does Sally like tattoos?"

12/02/20 12:21:40

 
stone face Vote score: 6763stone face

To bolster his sex drive, Bob joined a satanic cult.
To be honest ever since he joined, he's always got the horn

12/02/20 12:12:28

 
stone face Vote score: 6763stone face

My local pagan pub is getting really busy lately.
On friday it was heathen.

12/02/20 12:07:39

 
The Wolf Vote score: 5965The Wolf

Never go beyond the shop floor at Asda. The warehouse staff are creepy as f*ck.

12/02/20 12:02:43

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 958Karen Oakenfull

“Hurry up Tina!” Zach could never understand why it took women so long to get ready.

13/02/20 14:33:13

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 958Karen Oakenfull

Alex Cooper

13/02/20 14:17:51

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 477Mark Wilson

My psychic powers are telling me the name"Noah" will become big on caption.me

13/02/20 10:53:38

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 477Mark Wilson

My head is telling me to swipe left
My heart is telling me to swipe left
But my sense of humour is screaming swipe right

12/02/20 20:47:06

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 4133Lucky Elperro

'Your NHS is perfectly safe' says US trade negotiator.

12/02/20 18:49:50

 
J Gaskill Vote score: 94J Gaskill

“HEY KID........ wanna earn a fiddle?”

12/02/20 18:04:10

 
J Gaskill Vote score: 94J Gaskill

“I’m off to Georgia, Honeybunch! I’ll call you when my plane lands! I love you!”

12/02/20 18:02:03

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 1708Scrijjy Doo

♫ ♫ "No, he can't read my poker face." ♫ ♫

12/02/20 17:31:35

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 21317Ian Skelding

Dick head

12/02/20 15:13:18

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 5072Vivvy En

"I'd say my captioning style is satyr"

12/02/20 13:53:48

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 30674Tony Edwards

The Wild Man of Boneo.

12/02/20 12:19:13

 
stone face Vote score: 6763stone face

"Right, am going the bar. What d'ya want to drink, Satan?"

"I'll have a beelzebud, please."

12/02/20 12:16:00

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 8638Mr Dome

He can move any mountain

12/02/20 12:08:50

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9852Neil Mackenzie

Satanist’s claim they are a religion of Peace, Plague and Pestilence.

12/02/20 12:04:56

 
Molly R Vote score: 1412Molly R

I can't wait for the third series of Britannia.

12/02/20 12:01:09

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38785Welsh Rarebit

Devil Phwoarship

12/02/20 12:00:17

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9852Neil Mackenzie

He needs Goth Thick Makeup Remover.

12/02/20 12:00:11

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38785Welsh Rarebit

Horn of the Dead

12/02/20 12:00:10

 
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