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Ill have the salad, Ive been eating shit lately
Ill have the salad, Ive been eating shit lately photo | portfolio
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C CaMel Vote score: 4817C CaMel

'I'll have the salad, I've been eating shit lately'

22/10/16 19:04:29

 1
lol man --sandeep chahal
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9508Neil Mackenzie

"Come into my Parlour."
"Who said that?"

22/10/16 23:37:11

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 9310Vanessa the Guesser

Midge was waiting for Mary and Mungo to turn up.

22/10/16 20:20:43

 9
Wow Andrea. You had a rich upbringing 😋 --Mr Dome
Pete  Vote score: 18533Pete

"Leaf me alone. I've had a buzzy day."

22/10/16 20:12:07

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 37300Welsh Rarebit

Quick, someone send in the S.W.A.T team.

22/10/16 19:06:34

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 5897Hercules Rockefeller

"Why does everybody keep asking me if I know Jeff Goldblum?"

22/10/16 19:06:20

 1
Because your fly . 😀 --Smuldo
larry G. Vote score: 1368larry G.

"I'm starting to get a buzz after eating this crap."

24/10/16 16:27:46

 
Michael Monkhouse Vote score: 2804Michael Monkhouse

It was bad enough waking up with a hangover; then I got a proper look at what I shagged last night.

23/10/16 8:15:14

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19519John Glover

"Ok, you got me, I'm looking for a blow fly."

22/10/16 22:16:41

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 30089Tony Edwards

Flydrangea

22/10/16 21:43:44

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 4651Vivvy En

"Hi. Keep pointing that thing at me and I will make your life miserable! You got the message... from a Bottle?"

22/10/16 21:26:17

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 37300Welsh Rarebit

A Bug's Wife

22/10/16 21:22:48

 
Pete  Vote score: 18533Pete

Henry hides in a pot plant waiting to annoy the shit out of someone.

22/10/16 20:09:34

 
Steve Davies Vote score: 2441Steve Davies

Green fly.

22/10/16 19:53:03

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

♪ I know an old lady who swallowed a fly... ♪
"Derek, will you stop singing that to the young flies, it's giving them nightmares!"

22/10/16 19:35:09

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 37300Welsh Rarebit

'I'm just off to a manure handling course.'

22/10/16 19:33:45

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

I hear there's a nasty bug going around.

22/10/16 19:29:25

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 37300Welsh Rarebit

SWAT...'You rotten swine, you deaded me!"

22/10/16 19:11:41

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

Let us spray

22/10/16 19:11:15

 
Polymorph Vote score: 751Polymorph

" Flight Navigator to Squadron Leader, bare juicy human skin 12 yards on a 180 degrees !"

22/10/16 21:16:48

 
Mr Dome Vote score: 7549Mr Dome

This Hulk's ear tastes a bit plasticky

(Nod to made up words)

22/10/16 21:05:29

 
Mr Dome Vote score: 7549Mr Dome

In his work the Metamorphosis of Narcissus, Dahli depicted a Greek self-obsessed with his own beauty and, upon seeing his reflection in a pool and realised he could not embrace himself he died very frustrated. The gods subsequently immortalised him as the narcissus flower as we know it the daffodil, a thing of beauty. A fly however eats shit and lands on your ice cream. Not beautiful in my book. Especially if one gets squashed as I slam the book shut. Rant over. Night

22/10/16 21:00:12

 
Mr Dome Vote score: 7549Mr Dome

Larva. Fly. Repeat

22/10/16 20:52:15

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 13327Dan Nicholls

What do you call me without wings? A walk.

22/10/16 20:09:57

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19519John Glover

"Yer, I'm getting used to eating in the cow fields, I've now got it off pat."

22/10/16 19:44:41

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5715Greg Curtis

"Hey, that's my ex-larva."

22/10/16 19:43:37

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

"Fred, look out for the Venus Flytra.... Oh, too late."

22/10/16 19:40:20

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 4651Vivvy En

"Buzz off! I have no time to caption! Gotta fly..."

22/10/16 19:36:35

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 4651Vivvy En

'I've been so busy on a cow's backside. Now I think I'll go and hang out at the Great British Bake Off tent and watch the final live!'

22/10/16 19:29:54

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19519John Glover

"Ah, my captain, I return. I am back, I've arrived, and to prove it I'm here."
(nod to the Goons)

22/10/16 19:27:54

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

Take care, 007, I fear the room may have been bugged.

22/10/16 19:27:00

 
John Llamas Vote score: 19942John Llamas

"Son ....... when I was a young fly things were very different. People didn't bag up dog shit and we never had to search too hard for our next meal."

22/10/16 19:21:41

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

I don't like to name-drop, but that Chris Packham is a very good friend of mine.

22/10/16 19:20:34

 
Paul Reeve Vote score: 5135Paul Reeve

....WANTED.....One Green Bottle
Last seen hanging on a wall flower.

22/10/16 19:19:39

 
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