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How they got the groom to Mars on his stag night still remains a complete mystery.
How they got the groom to Mars on his stag night still remains a complete mystery. photo | portfolio
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Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 1540Karen Oakenfull

How they got the groom to Mars on his stag night still remains a complete mystery.

04/08/20 21:45:17

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 6832Hercules Rockefeller

Not all Terminators arrive gracefully.

04/08/20 20:00:41

 
Red Guy Vote score: 101Red Guy

I told you once, I told you a thousand times: North Korea is not a holiday hot spot.

04/08/20 20:25:05

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32077Tony Edwards

Hide and streak

04/08/20 20:06:24

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 12553Vanessa the Guesser

"I suppose you need my clothes, my boots and my motorcycle?"

04/08/20 20:00:40

 1
...he says to a nudist riding a segway.  --Glyn Evans
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 4949Kenny Ireland

"I have already got one "thumb up" yet no one has voted".

04/08/20 22:04:56

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10326Dave Bryan

Two months on the site without a vote was beginning to take its toll.

04/08/20 20:37:37

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10326Dave Bryan

''To be honest, I think glamping is a bit overrated.''

04/08/20 20:13:15

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 532Charles Gilbert

Where will you be when diarrhea strikes?

Wed 4:58:51

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 3641Crunchy Chords

“How am I doing these days? I’m... good, yeah, I’m good, everything's... fine.”

04/08/20 20:00:07

 
Ron  Allan Vote score: 5481Ron Allan

Hi Stan..can you let the greenkeeper know that I didn't think too much of his exploding golf ball prank?"

Wed 0:37:05

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 1677Mark Wilson

Shit, I've been sleep gardening again

04/08/20 23:15:56

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 10799Stephen Bean

Human bean

04/08/20 20:00:39

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23209Michael Winner

"This week on Gardener's World: why you shouldn't leave your spuds in too long, and the basics of spontaneous potato-based parthenogenesis mutation."

Wed 8:21:17

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23209Michael Winner

A scene from Samuel Beckett's 'The Very Hungry Caterpillar'.

04/08/20 21:48:16

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23209Michael Winner

This is why you shouldn't plant those mystery seeds from China.

04/08/20 21:27:00

 
Red Guy Vote score: 101Red Guy

No fun intended.

04/08/20 21:21:04

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20697John Glover

Toe knee hand cock.

04/08/20 20:58:03

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32077Tony Edwards

"Excuse me, do you mind if we play through?"

04/08/20 20:57:38

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10326Dave Bryan

Mother Earth

04/08/20 20:30:44

 
James Lennox Vote score: 5749James Lennox

"Ground control to Major Tom, take you protein pills and, for f*cks sake, put you helmet on."

04/08/20 20:18:17

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

"Dave, you know the expression there's always someone worst off than you? I think you maybe the one there're referring to"

04/08/20 20:09:40

 1
Nah, it's obvious to me that Dave's full of self pity. His situation isn't that bad and come on, living in a hole naked is obviously his chosen lot in life. That was what he was born to do. What some people wouldn't give to live in a wonderful... --Glyn Evans
David Robb Vote score: 178David Robb

Three miles on from the service station you wouldn't pay the extortionate price they wanted for imodium.

04/08/20 20:07:09

 
Al Overy Vote score: 553Al Overy

Even though he was thirty six, Jimmy would do anything to get out of bathtime.

04/08/20 20:05:33

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

Dave's mum found him captioning yet again.

04/08/20 20:03:43

 
Al Overy Vote score: 553Al Overy

If you adjust your telescope you can get a great close up of the moon.

04/08/20 20:02:10

 
Fozzgog B. Vote score: 187Fozzgog B.

After the "nuclear fart" incident the Phall curry from Jim's local takeaway was taken off the menu and banned under the Geneva Convention

04/08/20 22:02:40

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 1677Mark Wilson

"Told you I didn't have a clue how you play golf"

04/08/20 21:43:16

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

"So, do tell, how did the stag night go?"

04/08/20 21:13:04

 
Red Guy Vote score: 101Red Guy

Justin Bieber really wants to be taken seriously as an artist now.

04/08/20 20:55:39

 1
Not gonna happen. --Scrijjy Doo
alexandra ball Vote score: 554alexandra ball

Fetal Un-attraction!

04/08/20 20:13:00

 
James Lennox Vote score: 5749James Lennox

Fecal position.

04/08/20 20:11:06

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6716Glyn Evans

"Fore! Fore! Fore! Fore!" Jamie repeated to himself as he cried himself to sleep, the golf ball had disappeared somewhere under the pile of turf he had scooped up as a result of his frustrations until it got to a point where he threw off all his clothing and ran around the course thinking he was a zebra. I'll never understand the rules of cricket.

04/08/20 20:08:37

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22460Ian Skelding

Curled up with a good nook.

04/08/20 20:05:04

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10829Neil Mackenzie

I’m buggered if I can think of a caption.

04/08/20 20:00:14

 
Al Overy Vote score: 553Al Overy

The man who felt oo-er

Thu 17:40:10

 
Barrie Bullock Vote score: 596Barrie Bullock

Back to the womb.

Wed 16:11:01

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2465Scrijjy Doo

Let Trump explain this one.

Wed 0:01:59

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2465Scrijjy Doo

Don't wear a mask, they said. You'll be fine, they said.

Wed 0:01:31

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 4949Kenny Ireland

Fetality.

04/08/20 22:46:26

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15100Dan Nicholls

A turd in the hand is worth two in the bush.

04/08/20 21:57:10

 
Paul Reeve Vote score: 5724Paul Reeve

“Ignore him, he always acts like a big baby if he doesn’t get his own way.”

04/08/20 21:49:27

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2057Rachel P

What Lies Beneath

04/08/20 21:47:21

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9909Mr Dome

Dave woke with a sore head and nausea, unsure of what had happened the night before. The last thing he remembered was getting of the train at Middlesbrough...

04/08/20 21:15:26

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9006Chris Keegan

"Matthew, what on Earth???"

04/08/20 21:08:27

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20697John Glover

Dave was absolute crap at strip poker.

04/08/20 21:06:39

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9909Mr Dome

Crack addict

04/08/20 21:03:28

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9909Mr Dome

Cole?

04/08/20 20:56:45

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32077Tony Edwards

Shock and aww

04/08/20 20:50:24

 
Molly R Vote score: 1878Molly R

"I wish I had opted for a staycation."

04/08/20 20:44:19

 
Red Guy Vote score: 101Red Guy

Talk about a dirt nap.

04/08/20 20:42:33

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 4272Stu Dent

meteo-mike

04/08/20 20:12:14

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4797Karyn Harrison

Concealed entrance

04/08/20 20:08:36

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15100Dan Nicholls

Hurry up with that photo Dave, I'm busting for an Earth Kitt.

04/08/20 20:08:34

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22460Ian Skelding

Fetal Sassoon

04/08/20 20:02:06

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10829Neil Mackenzie

When a Woman leaves you she takes everything.

04/08/20 20:01:10

 
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