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"This week, on Taking a Selfie Using a Galaxy Note 7..."
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Michael Winner Vote score: 22300Michael Winner

"This week, on 'Taking a Selfie Using a Galaxy Note 7'..."

15/06/19 11:55:33

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 5899Hercules Rockefeller

"Dave, I think the marshmallow is done now."

15/06/19 11:14:37

 
Zak Toby1998 Vote score: 533Zak Toby1998

Peter looked up an old flame.

15/06/19 11:05:29

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 4876Stephen Bean

"Wish that bloody Gulliver wouldn't keep dropping his matches."

15/06/19 11:01:04

 
The Wolf Vote score: 4613The Wolf

Hot Rod

15/06/19 11:00:27

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 6968Chris Keegan

"It's a little embarrassing doctor. Whenever I get an erection I get this intense burning sensation"

15/06/19 11:00:11

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19520John Glover

"Bloody spiders."

15/06/19 11:28:25

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9508Neil Mackenzie

The Phantom Glass Blower of old London Town.

15/06/19 21:09:47

 
James Lennox Vote score: 3286James Lennox

"Remember that guy who used to light his farts at parties? He's a plumber now."

15/06/19 14:52:23

 2
I think this happens a lot to be honest and more often than people might realise or admit to. You will probably find that many plumbers used to be fart entertainers --Mr Dome
stone face Vote score: 5680stone face

"Well the doctor said the only way to deal with my over flatulent behind, was to have this pipe fitted up my jacksy, and to burn off any excess methane.

15/06/19 14:49:38

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 30093Tony Edwards

Hellend

15/06/19 11:37:51

 
The Wolf Vote score: 4613The Wolf

“Carl, I’m sure the Moth will just fly out if you leave it”

15/06/19 11:00:39

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 4876Stephen Bean

"Doctor my shaft feels like it's on fire."

15/06/19 11:00:28

 
larry G. Vote score: 1370larry G.

"No damn way I'm sticking this down my throat-I don't care how much America's Got Talent pays!"

15/06/19 17:37:24

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 5689Glyn Evans

Make the light bulb first, then change it.

15/06/19 13:10:54

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22300Michael Winner

Somehow, I don't think that 'extreme stunt golf' will catch on.

15/06/19 11:57:02

 
Molly R Vote score: 1108Molly R

I wish I hadn't visited that young lady in Amsterdam, let alone boasted about the length of my equipment

15/06/19 11:32:58

 
The Wolf Vote score: 4613The Wolf

"When I said I wanted a firestick for my birthday..."

15/06/19 11:07:51

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 9312Vanessa the Guesser

Pinocchio insisted on being cremated.

15/06/19 11:01:26

 
larry G. Vote score: 1370larry G.

"Yup, this should be just about the right amount of flame to light great grandpa's birthday cake candles."

15/06/19 17:43:29

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 5723Dave Bryan

Norfolk lamplighter out on his rounds

15/06/19 15:53:07

 
Richard  Bottom Vote score: 33Richard Bottom

"The spectacle reminded him of his last marriage"

15/06/19 15:38:45

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 2696Stu Dent

Cue the pyrotechnics

15/06/19 13:31:35

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 5723Dave Bryan

Although his ex had mains electricity, he was still carrying a torch for her.

15/06/19 13:17:16

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 6968Chris Keegan

"I think this is the waiter with your Sambuca love, you did say you wanted a large one didn't you?"

15/06/19 12:55:01

 
The Wolf Vote score: 4613The Wolf

"WOW, that guy is HOT! Seriously, check out the arson it"

15/06/19 12:30:02

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 7555Mr Dome

Blow me

15/06/19 12:24:22

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 7555Mr Dome

'UGGH! MAKE FIRE!'

15/06/19 12:18:37

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 6968Chris Keegan

Dave, when I said make sure you raise a glass for the toast......

15/06/19 12:05:52

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 30093Tony Edwards

"You're Fired!"

15/06/19 11:59:38

 
Trace Sarge Vote score: 2489Trace Sarge

"Take that and relight my fire"

15/06/19 11:31:33

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 20955Ian Skelding

Torchwood

15/06/19 11:17:55

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 30093Tony Edwards

Fiery Jack

15/06/19 11:07:24

 
Zak Toby1998 Vote score: 533Zak Toby1998

Fireballs

15/06/19 11:04:35

 
Zak Toby1998 Vote score: 533Zak Toby1998

Nice ball control

15/06/19 11:00:41

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 37322Welsh Rarebit

I see that Eddie the Eagle has a new hobby.

15/06/19 11:00:26

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 37322Welsh Rarebit

Charlie Potter and the Goblet of Fire

15/06/19 11:00:07

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 4876Stephen Bean

Fahrenheight

15/06/19 11:00:06

 
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