Extreme Speed Dating.

Henry had put too much air in his rubber doll and now was scared to take his thumb out in case she took off.

Midwife crisis.

Sorry love but I'm a genealogist. Now what did you say your surname was?

Maternity leave applications were the most unused forms in the Spearmint Rhino lap dancing club's HR department.

Bit late for the whole flirtatious thing love.

Pregnant paws

I'm not a gyneacologist but I'll take a quick look for you luv.

The shallow end of the jean pull.

Dr. Fredericks was shocked to hear 'professional misconduct' spelt out in Morse code.

Ward 7 was low on chairs and the walls were filthy, but they were happy

The search for the person who "ate all the pies" has been called off.

An immaculate conception, Doctor? Well, it was pretty good, I suppose.

"Yes he is a plumber, well who are you supposed to call when your waters break?"

Keith Chegwin's nephew came forward today to defend his criticaly slammed new kids show, 'Preggers Goes Pop!'.

June is bustin' out all over.

Tom was starting to think this wasn't the iPod model he'd originally ordered.

Allegations of professional misconduct were nothing new to Dr 'Fingers' O'Flaherty.

Drink beer.It won't make you pregnant.

He says that when he gets out he's going to start poking me with a finger and see if I like it.

"are you the mother?"

Belly jeans.

"Oh my God he's talking!"
"What is he saying?"
"He's saying please Mummy and Daddy don't make me wear a pair"

"I'm recommending an immediate C-Section."

"Really?"

"Yes, just take the lift to Floor 3 and ask one of the nurses to direct you to the Cuckoo Section."

Even though she told him it was his, john's keen eye sensed otherwise.

Pre natal depress son.

"Doh! , that's what the pills were for!"

Ultra-unsound

YEP, I can hear it ticking. What on earth made you swallow your biological clock for.

They had now reached that time in the pregnancy when they could share blue Genes

People on glass chairs shouldnt have lapdances

Anorexic sufferer Nichole had put on a lot of weight since she started chewing her finger nails.

You're not pregnant, you're just fat. When I said "Push," it was only because my car won't start.

Jayne had won a competition to play a round with Tiger Woods, however her husband must've wished they'd started at the second hole.

She was often heard to retort '...or I'll eat my hat', but many thought she was bluffing.

jean genius.

Dr. Jones' bedside manner might have been better if he'd stayed at the bedside

The last time they had played doctors and nurses, he had given her an injection.

Womb with a view

Debbie's diet backfires after she cuts down on the pill because of the sugar coating