"Let's go home Mary. Ten years camping out here and still no sign of the monster."

26/09/18 8:10:46

The Lion Cling.

15/09/18 8:02:14

"Have you any idea how many people have been looking for you ?"

10/09/18 8:01:18

"I want THAT one...."

18/10/18 8:07:34

creative

🎵 "I fought the slaw and the, slaw won..."

02/10/18 8:30:59

Interesting building. How many stories ?

21/10/18 20:02:03

Last hoarders please !

09/09/18 9:10:31

" Honestly officer....a big ginger cat !"

19/09/18 12:01:06

clever

I'm outstanding in my field.

06/09/18 8:04:39

"You're gonna need a bigger board."

10/10/18 12:01:39

"Take me to your ladder"

10/10/18 8:16:53

clever

Man: "You gotta let me in with me guide dog."
Steward: "That's not a guide dog, they're Labradors."
Man: "What have they given me then ?"

01/10/18 12:57:36

lol

🎵 "Nothing you could say could tear me away from..."

27/09/18 12:48:09

Fency footwork.

08/11/18 8:03:29

clever

"What's wrong with you people ?"
Another brilliant caption gets no votes.

07/11/18 8:16:12

There's already too much division in our society.

27/10/18 8:08:44

Jolly Rotten.

14/10/18 20:04:06

On the plus side....they're generous here with the chocolate sprinkles.

14/09/18 20:03:39

Business is grooming.

05/10/18 12:43:53

lol

Old finger ! She's the nan...the nan with the
China cups....those finer cups....

21/09/18 20:50:16

Despite the theft of all his props, Punch and Judy man insists : "The show must go on."

07/11/18 8:07:07

"There it goes again...a definite rattling sound.."

11/10/18 21:06:47

Cloth ears.

30/10/18 8:06:34

"Good evening madam. Have you booked ?"

03/11/18 8:15:13

🎵"There's cling ons on the arbor bough....."

02/11/18 8:14:19

Tree huggers.

02/11/18 8:00:44

You see...it IS possible to make new friends on the web.

01/11/18 12:07:03

" Does the 666 stop here ?"

31/10/18 20:02:26

"The last time I saw him he was full of beans..."

31/10/18 12:04:55

"We're gonna need more cats...I can STILL hear that f***ing drummer.

21/10/18 12:14:54

creative

Scot of the arse antics.

17/10/18 20:21:35

creative

"I didn't see you at camouflage practice !!!"
"I know...I'm good aint I ?"

04/10/18 8:03:07

The day after the Blue Peter item: "how to make your own burka."

30/09/18 8:45:13

"Have you tried turning it off and on again ?"

29/09/18 20:04:54

Hartlepool illuminations.

07/09/18 8:16:31

Headestrian.

29/10/18 20:01:14

Work has begun on Britain's version of Mount Rushmore. Already completed...Gordon Brown.

19/10/18 20:10:53

Hall stones.

12/10/18 12:07:18

Last week it was the Tabby National.

05/10/18 9:04:07

World's slowest walker injured delivering acorn.

03/10/18 8:17:05

White man don't need to jump.

28/09/18 12:52:52

Kevin had no problem doing his ten thousand steps a day.

20/09/18 12:11:50

For a small club, they have a high turnover of players.

06/11/18 20:13:06

I had a car like that once. Doors wouldn't shut.

05/11/18 20:12:56

Best ever Donald Trump likeness....they've even took the brains out !

01/11/18 8:20:11

A natter of life and death.

31/10/18 20:06:16

"Excuse me...I asked for DIET coke..."

22/10/18 12:10:52

It's Phil Collins ! I can see you coming out the ear tonight...

23/09/18 12:01:40

"Behave, and I'll get you some Werthers".

23/09/18 8:01:52

It started out as a cat flap.

09/09/18 13:06:06

At last Brian was in his own film.

07/11/18 12:12:39

Jacob Rees-Moggy.

04/11/18 12:01:13

My family tree. All the girls called Iris, all the boys called Luke.
We don't talk about Glance-a-lot.

22/10/18 20:14:02

The Cake Crusader

21/10/18 8:01:29

"No,YOU tell it to keep off the grass."

13/10/18 8:18:33

At midnight they take on a Fyffe of their own.

12/10/18 8:05:47

"I'm looking for Pie Guy"

29/09/18 8:59:51

April 1986 : The last time Boris went near a salad.

27/09/18 8:08:32

Look at the size of that ****king cobra !

25/09/18 8:02:42

Rat: "Don't eat the pies."

14/09/18 20:01:29

Samir always liked to give the driver a big tip.

13/09/18 20:01:58

"Mine's a large one."

10/09/18 12:58:54

The Joy Of Six.

06/11/18 20:06:21

In the doorway...I think I've spotted Lord Lucan.

05/11/18 20:03:43

"Don't affect me, I'm on me bike."

05/11/18 12:01:35

Kitteny Spears

29/10/18 8:13:45

Haute catoure.

29/10/18 8:00:33

High street.

25/10/18 12:00:43

🎵 "You can leave your baton"

25/10/18 8:01:31

"It's a nice day luv, I think i'll let me pigeons out.

20/10/18 13:15:12

"Hello luv. How did you get on with your fish pedicure ?"

12/10/18 20:05:54

creative

"That's great...now we gotta work on the running and the bike ride..."

11/10/18 13:31:09

🎵 "You're once, twice, three times yodelaydeee."

11/10/18 8:24:00

Tonight's winner gets a big purse.

30/09/18 20:01:43

"I'm getting out now Brian, fetch us a clean trowel."

30/09/18 13:47:02

I know that car...it's Greg's.

27/09/18 12:06:07

Glam post.

21/09/18 9:06:13

"Have you got vertigo ?"
"No, I only live round the corner"

16/09/18 8:04:51

When Keith joined the prison library, it opened up a whole new world for him.

02/11/18 20:05:43

A sign of the times.

27/10/18 8:01:17

Dave was smoking up to twenty pens a day...he's a Biro-maniac.

26/10/18 20:26:52

"When we get back to Earth, d'you think we'll get to meet President Truman ?"

24/10/18 20:31:01

I'm going slightly Madge.

20/10/18 20:15:16

clever

Jack Wettriano.

19/10/18 12:19:49

"Look at what you could've won !"

19/10/18 8:16:15

There's a time and a place to practice your moonwalk.

17/10/18 12:21:59

Bit of a niche market...the albino vegan cowboy.

16/10/18 20:04:21

Denmark's ban on the veil is having an adverse effect on young bee keepers.

15/10/18 20:09:45

Kerb faller.

03/10/18 8:05:19

Betty Criminal.

02/10/18 8:09:32

Top Gear meets Countdown.

17/09/18 12:00:48