Take 'em all, they're driving me mad following me about everywhere. I'll put the money in your bag.

31/08/18 7:01:17

DOA, is that a good number plate for a taxi ?

02/09/18 11:07:12

Trish 'n chips.

27/08/18 11:00:17

Well that doesn't apply to me thought the miniature alpaca.

05/09/18 11:26:19

Ankle Biters.

03/09/18 7:00:34

It was the worst case of prickly heat the doctor had ever seen.

13/08/18 20:00:21

No one puts Davey in the corner.

12/09/18 7:15:20

He had always been a great fan of Muddy Waters.

14/08/18 7:13:37

Mum realised when she went to collect Melvin that 25 years at uni had changed him forever.

24/08/18 15:59:53

She prepared her own wake before passing over.

23/08/18 19:52:47

He felt absolutely filthy.

14/08/18 19:07:14

It was great to have the kids home from uni but .......

09/08/18 7:15:56

Spiderpan.

05/09/18 20:13:48

Panda Express.

01/09/18 11:01:12

For when you just haven't got the energy.

18/09/18 7:19:15

Can I hear pan pipes ?

07/09/18 13:09:27

None of the junior doctors could feel a pulse, was this an omen ?

30/08/18 7:01:04

The new cola and chips diet is to die for.

27/08/18 7:01:27

I can't palate smoking.

26/08/18 19:05:04

He'd make a lovely handbag and even has built in clasps.

25/08/18 11:46:49

Is this the bread winner ?

18/08/18 13:26:57

Just as you were getting ready to launch off on an adventure around the universe your travel buddy gets stuck in a wormhole.

13/10/18 14:22:06

The Cobra didn't know whether it was AC or DC !

25/09/18 9:00:10

The radio controlled piglet was the best toy she had been given and it also had an everlasting squeak.

08/09/18 12:15:23

She was of course providing a public service, but just hated standing on street corners all day.

07/09/18 7:18:08

OK hun, I’ll be back on the website in a minute, just having a quick fly up.

05/09/18 19:00:14

The new pan that mum bought him to take to uni was ruined on it's first outing.

04/09/18 19:04:25

Sheilas' wheels.

02/09/18 6:27:42

She'd been black balled at the golf club.

31/08/18 11:03:09

This is my "Dad lost to Vettel again" face !!

26/08/18 15:31:15

Cricket keeper.

25/08/18 19:00:52

A level results were out, he'd got a D for drama but an A* for anthropology.

24/08/18 15:52:01

Grassed up.

13/08/18 8:31:14

We can work this out buddy, you help me get this pain in my shoulder fixed and I'll donate one of my testicles to you

11/08/18 7:05:13

The Walker Brothers

10/08/18 12:38:32

"I wanted a long tailed Tit" Nevil said to the demon tattooist

10/08/18 8:01:40

Her husband had let the housework go whilst she was in hospital !

09/08/18 7:05:17

Vincent van Dog

08/08/18 11:23:34

Is there something the matter with your horn Jim ?

11/10/18 7:00:28

Oh woad is me.

01/10/18 8:16:50

Red run......

20/09/18 17:37:02

Steps new CD cover shot !

20/09/18 17:36:25

He loved his new school bag but the straps had broken.

15/09/18 7:03:10

Mum, have you burnt the bacon again ?

14/09/18 12:21:59

The Shelsea Flower Show was disrupted by protesters against plant cruelty.

14/09/18 11:27:13

The smoked glass factory where the staff were worked to death.

14/09/18 11:20:13

Fire drills were held every couple of hours at Marlboro.

14/09/18 11:18:28

Amazing they all went to different schools....

12/09/18 19:22:42

Shoulerlads gone mad !!

12/09/18 19:14:37

The competitors were neck an neck and neck.

12/09/18 19:12:03