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	This Week				Last Week			All Time
	Quota	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank	Added	Score	Rank
Captions	64	3	1	#33	1	5	#32	7951	14290	#20
Photos			1	#10				4	11	#20
Comments	31	1	2	#10				132	227	#36
Forum Posts		3						7
Suggested Edits

	This Week		Last Week		All Time
	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank	Voted	Rank
Captions					5441	#41
Photos					510	#36
Comments					192	#35
Forum Posts
Suggested Edits	1	#2			1	#13

captions comments received captioned photos

captions

	"Darren, when I asked you to put the TV on...." 22/01/19 20:00:08	15

	lol I just find at this time of year my colander gets really busy 19/12/18 20:01:32	15

	No batteries required 12/10/18 8:00:11	4 15
Drawing eyes on a banana with a felt-tip pen so that it looks like a dolphin is very amusing and it gives me someone to talk to! --Karyn Harrison
	It 's ever since i started them on Winalot. 22/08/18 8:13:01	15

	Peeking Duck 05/08/18 8:00:11	15

	lol Jesus, I really did upset her this time 13/06/18 8:06:42	15

	Igloo 06/05/18 12:00:07	15

	Guys, 4 passengers is the max I'm allowed..what do you think this is..a bloody Tardis?? 25/04/18 20:02:29	1 15

	Fowling the pavement 05/11/17 21:17:57	15

	creative I ended up dreading parents day at school. 06/07/23 12:19:45	14

	"So, I walked into this packed pub, shouted 'TOPLESS BIRD LYING IN THE PARK!' and got served in no time!" 03/05/23 12:33:14, edited: 03/05/23 18:47:22	14

	Starring a bunch of old has Beans. 16/03/23 20:00:47, edited: 17/03/23 9:39:50	14

	Sarah had it fitted so Dave can be aware of its existence. 09/03/23 12:00:22	1 14
It's about time Dave used the toilet, he's been using the cat litter tray for far too long now --Glyn Evans
	Darling, I think the car has a punkture. 10/02/23 12:00:24	1 14
Johnny Rotten luck... --Julia Kinsey
	Rex is clearly shocked by the size of Micky’s erection. 07/11/22 12:00:12	1 14

	clever Debbie and Ray are so pleased the warmer weather has arrived, they can finally afford to eat today. 09/05/22 12:01:30	14

	'Working from home hasn't affected me at all' Said Michael Jones, Director of Lloyds Bank. 25/11/20 8:36:44	14

	clever Mike detects earth tremors pretty much everywhere he goes. 03/11/20 12:00:33	14

	"I tried that new barbers down the road yesterday" - "Yeah, me too Dave" 30/10/20 12:04:33	14

	lol In a moment of magnificent inspiration Kevin and Julie saved themselves thirty quid for a babysitter and went out. 27/10/20 8:00:41	1 14
The lights are on but nobody's home. --Willie Johnson
	Tom and Dave think it's bloody hilarious nobody can go out clubbing anymore! 26/10/20 12:00:08	14

	They had a boy. Greyam. 22/09/20 12:01:56	14

	Dave was devastated when his mum and dad suggested it was time he moved out. 02/07/20 8:07:42	14

	Yet another blond moment strikes, Linda had an appointment to see the Doc. 26/06/20 12:24:50	14

	lol Sainsburys are forced to close as a Tate and Lyle delivery goes horribly wrong. 17/01/20 9:13:05	14

	Now in Cinemas - Frozen, number 2. 23/12/19 8:05:40	14

	🎵..the Red-Nosed Reindeer....🎵 20/12/19 12:40:27	5 14
Don't know whether the lady's a Dancer or a Vixen! --Karyn Harrison
	This wasn't what Malcolm expected when he joined the Army and was told he'd be posted abroad. 19/12/19 21:27:51	14

	It would seem we've signed a new player... 20/11/19 8:00:25	1 14

	After years of searching it was clear that I had discovered why bears sh*t in the woods. 25/10/19 8:01:46	14

	Faulty Towers 09/08/19 21:33:36	14

	"Quick Dave! Pull your trigger!!!" 26/05/19 8:34:33	14

	lol "Yes love, it does" 02/04/19 12:02:41	14

	lol Jesus Christ love, we're only going down the pub for a quick half! 21/01/19 20:06:32	14

	lol And how was your Bernard Matthews turkey? 27/12/18 10:11:02	2 14
I laughed because I had both "bootiful" and "tough as old boots" pop into my head at the same instant! --Molly R
	Good old Dave, he spent so long attempting to chip his ball out of the bunker he moved in. 20/11/18 13:50:19	14

	It took me a while to get through that beer but the wife's Christmas present is sorted. 28/10/18 20:02:47	14

	Come on guys, you can clearly see he was down first when the music stopped 03/10/18 20:00:24	14

	lol At least we were spared the photo of him in the dump truck 30/09/18 12:00:42	14

	James Exceled at swimming. 29/09/18 20:09:59	14

	Dinner Date 15/09/18 8:26:44	14

	I personally didn't like their kitchen but it takes allsorts... 21/11/17 8:16:32	14

	Very nice love, but I was actually hoping for a scarf. 26/05/23 12:05:07, edited: 26/05/23 12:31:50	13

	♪ What's new Pussy Cap ♪ 11/02/23 8:00:46, edited: 11/02/23 13:27:40	13

	lol Note to self, when robbing a bank always ask the get away driver what type of car he’ll be turning up in. 02/02/23 12:12:10	13

	Dave, there's worst to come, apparently it's over the wrong river.... 22/10/22 16:15:07, edited: 22/10/22 16:18:33	13

	Following 2 years of working from home Raj adapted well to being back in the office. 19/05/22 20:50:34	13

	lol Onlooker recognises her donation to the charity shop. 12/03/22 8:29:44	1 13

	'Park in my space again and I shall personally make sure you go to hell' 01/11/21 20:03:45	13

	"He's not even mine, he just walked in one day and occupied the lounge, then the hall, the kitchen and now upstairs. It's like he wants to take the place over" 22/10/21 20:01:19	13

	Dave suffers from parking sons. 15/10/21 8:45:15	1 13
That's parking son. Only one is left. --Willie Johnson
	Crowds start gathering to watch people drinking and eating scotch eggs in tier 2. 30/11/20 20:31:15	13

	lol There have been calls for this statue to be removed. Apparently he was a sh*thead. 07/07/20 8:17:52	13

	Dave's intense fear of flying was being pleasantly distracted by walking round an abandoned asylum killing zombies with an axe. 09/06/20 12:20:41	13

	lol I'm not surprised he's knackered, he came in at twenty to one this morning. 01/02/20 15:58:13	13

	One foot in the rave"¦.. 30/01/20 12:00:56	13

	Reservoir Dogs 29/01/20 8:07:29	13

	She had a silly cone implant. 27/01/20 12:00:06	13

	I suppose a fork is out of the question? 18/12/19 8:00:17	13

	"I'm afraid Sarah won't be in today, she's caught some sort of bug" 03/12/19 8:00:12	13

	It was just enough of a distraction for Chris to help himself to the bench. 27/11/19 20:01:59	3 13
Maybe he should be called Rob? --Willie Johnson
	I wouldn't say she's spoiled but that's her dolls house in the background. 13/11/19 8:11:09	13

	No Entry. 21/10/19 8:04:41	13

	lol Apparently Landfill went the extra mile and scored in the last minute. 04/10/19 12:00:09	1 13
And three other signs went to the landfill. --Willie Johnson
	The young newlyweds are clearly delighted to eventually be back home following their Thomas Cook break. 25/09/19 8:02:25	13

	lol creative "So how often are these horrendous nose bleeds?" - "About once a month" 29/07/19 20:09:36	2 13
This kinda joking has to stop, PERIOD. --Greg Curtis
	clever I wish I'd been arrested while walking down the aisle..... 21/05/19 10:36:13	13

	Pete's waiting for his swimming coach 27/04/19 12:24:20	13

	"This is unusual Mrs Jones, it's usually your husband I pick up with some bird" 25/04/19 20:08:37	2 13

	"Sorry love, I just can't make up my mind. Can you try the flying ducks again?" 13/04/19 19:02:22	13

	clever What a fab idea, sham poo on tap. 01/03/19 8:21:53	13

	lol Meanwhile, at the County Fair, the 'guess my dress size' attraction was proving popular. 21/02/19 12:11:06	13

	clever Following increased security, Police foil suspected terrorist gang. 02/02/19 20:33:04	1 13

	lol clever "And that's why, at this point of every month, I start shouting at the two of you" 26/01/19 10:20:19	2 13

	creative clever Foot, Sea, 100 13/01/19 12:54:37	13

	Gardeners World Raining Champion. 05/12/18 20:00:44	13

	Cat on a hot bin roof 21/11/18 8:00:07	13

	It's a brick wall son, a bit like talking to your father. 20/10/18 8:06:54	1 13

	lol "You'll never guess who I bumped into today while having a fag break" - "Who?" "Everyone" 14/09/18 13:07:20	13

	lol "Errr, guys, sorry you'er not quite in the centre..it's just a jump to the left"... 23/05/18 8:00:28	13

	This morning a TV crew forced their way into a flat. It's break in news. 26/04/18 8:22:28	13

	Darling...don't you think it's time to cut the lawn.. 23/03/18 12:09:29	13

	A night on the tiles 02/03/18 12:05:03	1 13
Alternatively: a mite on the tiles --Dave Bryan
	"Have you seen that new film about UFO's?" "No, but I've seen the trailer" 10/02/18 12:09:18	13

	clever Heavy Petting 06/12/17 16:02:06	13

	"I hear Tom has moved in with his bird" 16/03/24 20:05:07	1 12

	"On a positive note, you're going to save a fortune on dentistry, glasses and haircuts" 09/03/24 12:06:54	12

	Flown to the lions. 07/06/23 20:51:04	12

	Looks like he could do with a Veg table. 13/04/23 12:00:33	12

	How will I recognise you? 17/03/23 12:04:45, edited: 17/03/23 12:31:30	12

	Jump Suit 08/02/23 20:00:12	12

	“Do you ever pee in the bath??” - "Yep, carrot too!” 16/11/22 13:16:53	12

	Dave is his step dad. 31/10/22 8:04:35	12

	Sunak continues to suggest everything’s fine. 28/10/22 12:00:10	1 12
I considered a Sunak caption but wanted something that would still be relevant by the end of voting. --John Harrison
	I preferred Fly Tipping by J.R Hartley. 05/10/22 12:29:11	12

	creative When Dave eventually got home he couldn't believe it. He had been wearing his T Shirt back to front all day! 30/09/22 21:15:44	12

	'Thank you for calling The Conservative Party, press 1 for someone who doesn't care, 2 for someone who can't be bothered or 3 for someone who's sleeping off a hangover' 19/05/22 21:15:43	12

	He's put on a few stones 30/04/22 9:49:02	1 12
I reckon he’s nicked a few! 😉 --Karen Oakenfull
	And so it came to pass, following the great floods of 1931 this part of London became know as Chairing Cross. 05/03/22 20:00:34	12

	"Darling, it's your turn to walk the dog" 30/09/21 20:19:28	2 12
Don't have to go as far as you did an hour or so ago. --Willie Johnson

more captions

last comments (total: 465)

Well done Chris - really good caption

Mr Dome

01/03/24
10:44am

comment on caption:
“Jeeez Dave, it’s not looking good, they usually come out with a stretcher” [Chris Keegan]

Congratulations, Chris. Well done!

Vivvy En

01/03/24
10:54am

comment on caption:
“Jeeez Dave, it’s not looking good, they usually come out with a stretcher” [Chris Keegan]

Brilliant caption, Chris. Congratulations!

Karyn Harrison

01/03/24
11:39am

comment on caption:
“Jeeez Dave, it’s not looking good, they usually come out with a stretcher” [Chris Keegan]

Geoff Hearse. Oh,it's finished. Well done Chris.

Dan Nicholls

01/03/24
12:09pm

comment on caption:
“Jeeez Dave, it’s not looking good, they usually come out with a stretcher” [Chris Keegan]

Congrats, Chris. Great caption and well deserved.

The Wolf

01/03/24
1:16pm

comment on caption:
“Jeeez Dave, it’s not looking good, they usually come out with a stretcher” [Chris Keegan]

Well done! An excellent caption (if a little risky given recent events!)

John Harrison

01/03/24
3:17pm

comment on caption:
“Jeeez Dave, it’s not looking good, they usually come out with a stretcher” [Chris Keegan]

Oh look, it's the first of the month again - I'm always late on parade for this, and all the available punning congratulations have already been used. Fortunately, there's no penalty for being tardy with my congratulations!