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Whos the father?  God knows.
Whos the father?  God knows. photo | portfolio
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Dave Bryan Vote score: 21433Dave Bryan

''Who's the father?''

''God knows.''

06/05/22 12:07:33

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 9839Glyn Evans

"That's amazing. I can see Jesus's face in one of Gulliver's sperms!"

06/05/22 15:42:09

 1
I wonder how much she'd get for him on eBay. --Karyn Harrison
Stephen Bean Vote score: 23894Stephen Bean

"Sorry about your limbs son. I was legless when you were conceived."

06/05/22 12:05:22

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 12056Chris Keegan

Great, no sex and an ugly baby, I was clearly very bad in a former life.

06/05/22 12:34:08

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 9800Vivvy En

The bond between mother and infant is not always instant.

06/05/22 12:22:00

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 6128Lucky Elperro

"You're having a giraffe"

06/05/22 12:37:03

 
Al Overy Vote score: 12586Al Overy

"Yeah, but no, but I definitely didn't have sex this time and I wasn't even drunk and you can even ask other Mary so this is not my baby and anyway he doesn't even look like God."

06/05/22 12:00:31

 
James Lennox Vote score: 11533James Lennox

"And Jesus said 'I am the Bread of Life' and everyone did agree as he looked like a loaf of Hovis."

06/05/22 12:56:23

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 6128Lucky Elperro

"Oh dear my son, you do look a bit like James Hewitt"

06/05/22 12:32:55

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 21433Dave Bryan

''Are you sure he's the Son of God? He stinks like hell.''

06/05/22 12:02:08

 3
Of course he’s the Son of God he stinks to high heaven. --Neil Mackenzie
Al Overy Vote score: 12586Al Overy

I'd always been told Jesus was descended from carpenters but new evidence suggests he was in bread.

06/05/22 12:00:16

 3
The question still remains was he white bread, brown bread or burnt bread? --Neil Mackenzie
Willie Johnson Vote score: 3701Willie Johnson

"I've named him Jesus."
"You named him after the gardener?"

06/05/22 21:12:39

 
John  Glover Vote score: 22573John Glover

"Now let's see if it will go back in to where it came from."

06/05/22 17:33:17

 
Al Overy Vote score: 12586Al Overy

"Subway - Eat Fresh"

06/05/22 12:01:01

 1
"This is not what I ordered. Could you change it?" --Willie Johnson
Stephen Bean Vote score: 23894Stephen Bean

"What are you going to call him Mrs Furter?"

"Frank."

06/05/22 12:00:57

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 7826Greg Curtis

The Pupil Stage

06/05/22 19:16:02

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 5336Scrijjy Doo

Mr. Peanut had a miracle birth too, but you never hear about that.

06/05/22 18:36:33

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 13236Neil Mackenzie

Jesus looked at Mary and thought I know why Dad picked you. You’ve got a neck like a sword swallower.

06/05/22 17:22:38

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 7826Greg Curtis

Surreal Pain in the Ass

06/05/22 16:24:30

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 1867alexandra ball

Are you sure it's mine?

06/05/22 13:54:11

 
Al Overy Vote score: 12586Al Overy

"I'll never forget this day, Son."

"Because I'm an immaculate conception?"

"No, because I've inexplicably superglued a commemorative plate to my head."

06/05/22 12:43:29

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 6128Lucky Elperro

"Now I'm going to tell you a story"

06/05/22 12:35:51

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 14040Mr Dome

Did you have anaesthetic?
No he's unaesthetic

06/05/22 12:09:18

 
Dave E Vote score: 661Dave E

"Jesus!"

06/05/22 12:04:56

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 23894Stephen Bean

Sausage sprog

06/05/22 12:00:17

 
Molly R Vote score: 3581Molly R

"Here you are, take him - I'm not nursing that."

06/05/22 12:00:05

 
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