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Dear Mrs Parker,  While we understand your frustration, we regret to inform you that your neighbour is perfectly within their rights to have any garden ornaments they choose.  Yours sincerely, Luton Town Council
Dear Mrs Parker,  While we understand your frustration, we regret to inform you that your neighbour is perfectly within their rights to have any garden ornaments they choose.  Yours sincerely, Luton Town Council photo | portfolio
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This photo is more than three days old, so captioning is over

captions

Stephen Bean Vote score: 20183Stephen Bean

Dear Mrs Parker,
While we understand your frustration, we regret to inform you that your neighbour is perfectly within their rights to have any garden ornaments they choose.

Yours sincerely,
Luton Town Council

06/10/21 11:05:57

 4
Thank you, it's an honour to have inspired such a great caption. I remember thinking a nod was unnecessary lol. --Stephen Bean
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 6220Tosser Wivlov

I told you we should paint it before putting it up.

06/10/21 13:03:52

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 2296Karen Oakenfull

“……then turn left and drive about half a mile to the end of the road and you’ll see my house on the corner next to the statue……What do you mean you can’t find it!?”

06/10/21 11:49:22

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 20183Stephen Bean

I hate it when people start putting up their Christmas decorations in October.

06/10/21 11:27:00

 
C CaMel Vote score: 8024C CaMel

“Queen to A5”

06/10/21 12:55:48

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 20183Stephen Bean

"What happens if it blows over in the wind?"

"Don't worry, we've thought of that."

06/10/21 11:23:34

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 17893Dave Bryan

''If you follow my teachings, you will find the way to perfect contentment.''

''You mean......''

''Yes, your computer will keep making that funny ringing noise all day.''

06/10/21 11:17:38

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 17893Dave Bryan

''Why do I spend all my days writing captions, Buddha?''

''Because you were sinful in your previous life.''

06/10/21 11:02:36

 4
Is that why every time a captioner disappears they're reincarnated as a new one?  --Glyn Evans
Al Overy Vote score: 8976Al Overy

"Madam, we retrieved the onboard camera from your husband's vehicle which show's the footage of him crashing into the giant Buddha and also his final words."

"Thank you, Officer. What were they?"

"Holy shit!"

06/10/21 12:45:29

 1
I’m so glad this caption got 3 votes. It made me burst out laughing. --Stephen Bean
C CaMel Vote score: 8024C CaMel

Locals haven’t seen the light for years.

06/10/21 11:23:33

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 3984Mark Wilson

"What's with all the wires?"

"Easier to pull down if they turn out to be a slave trader"

06/10/21 14:19:28

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 2296Karen Oakenfull

“It’s starting to look black over Bill’s mothers.”
“F*cking hell. Is that Bill’s mother?”

06/10/21 12:03:29

 1
I've always known it as "a bit black over Will's mum's". I liked to imagine Will, a 19th-century country lad and not very educated, pausing in his farm work and saying to his mates: "It's looking a bit black over me mum's" - and them tak... --Molly R
Chris Keegan Vote score: 11165Chris Keegan

It only turns out they built it in meters instead of millimetres, they clearly got their wires crossed.

06/10/21 11:07:05

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 17893Dave Bryan

''Don't get me wrong, Ethel, I've got nothing against Buddha. I just wish he wouldn't play with his cup and ball near busy roads.''

06/10/21 11:05:32

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 12733Mr Dome

It beats the marshmallow man I guess

06/10/21 13:58:14

 
C CaMel Vote score: 8024C CaMel

When it was destroyed by the earthquake my family were crushed.

06/10/21 11:28:28

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 17893Dave Bryan

CAPTIONEERS ENTRANCE EXAM

''The figure in the photo never puts margarine on his bread.''

Please complete the above caption. You have a time limit of four hours.

06/10/21 11:26:45

 1
Glyn Evans Vote score: 8911Glyn Evans

"I don't care who they are, we're not stopping to pick up the hitch hiker"

06/10/21 11:14:32

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 3984Mark Wilson

"Looks good but we said we wanted it painted cream

06/10/21 11:10:31

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 16380Dan Nicholls

...And on the right you will see a statue to our country's most revered snooker referee.

06/10/21 11:08:43

 
Molly R Vote score: 3169Molly R

"Now, you can see there is nothing up my sleeve ... but look what I have found in your ear!"

06/10/21 11:02:06

 
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