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"Come on, walkies. Martin, bring the bin bags in case Rover drops one."
"Come on, walkies. Martin, bring the bin bags in case Rover drops one." photo | portfolio
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Dan Nicholls Vote score: 12505Dan Nicholls

"Come on, walkies. Martin, bring the bin bags in case Rover drops one."

11/06/19 8:31:28

 1
It's ok picking it up in the binbag...but it's a bastard trying to throw it onto a tree. --stone face
stone face Vote score: 4248stone face

Anyone who tries to break in will be taken to tusk.

11/06/19 8:05:23

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 4244Dave Bryan

''You were worried about the elephant in the room so I let it into the garden.''

11/06/19 8:03:51

 
The Wolf Vote score: 2668The Wolf

"When I said I fancied something poached for breakfast..."

11/06/19 8:00:14

 
Scrappy Doo Vote score: 806Scrappy Doo

You're giving the dog too much food.

11/06/19 15:16:15

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9186Neil Mackenzie

Elephant holding pen.
I never knew they could write?

11/06/19 9:07:43

 
James Lennox Vote score: 1991James Lennox

This photo proves elephants can't read ... or they don't respect privacy ... or they're not afraid of dogs ... or they own private residences and keep dogs as pets ... OK, so this photo doesn't prove anything.

11/06/19 9:38:42

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 2988Stephen Bean

He eats Pedigree Chumbo.

11/06/19 8:03:45

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 2988Stephen Bean

Man's biggest friend

11/06/19 8:01:53

 1
Willie Johnson Vote score: 143Willie Johnson

You mean the dog that's under the elephant's foot?

11/06/19 8:01:25

 
Generic RedHead Vote score: 273Generic RedHead

"Sorry, got to go, the mother-in-law is here"

12/06/19 1:08:07

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19023John Glover

"When I asked Blind Jack why he had bought an elephant. He was shocked, he thought he'd got a large dog with a massive penis."

11/06/19 11:57:10

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 8219Vanessa the Guesser

Never trust a woman who offers you a glimpse of African bush.

11/06/19 8:31:17

 
Spycenwolf  Vote score: 858Spycenwolf

The elephants are more realistic if you drink absinth.

11/06/19 8:11:28

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 1740Crunchy Chords

Must be one of those large Siberian tuskies.

12/06/19 11:39:49

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 1740Crunchy Chords

Ivory dog has his day.

12/06/19 11:38:04

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 143Willie Johnson

Wait, how did that elephant jump the fence?

12/06/19 9:46:32

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5614Tosser Wivlov

Who used to live in a house like this?

11/06/19 17:07:19

 
larry G. Vote score: 1256larry G.

TRUNK SALE-enquire within.

11/06/19 14:50:40

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 4188Vivvy En

"He grew up terribly confused, his mother was a right bitch"

11/06/19 11:30:33

 
Mark England Vote score: 14876Mark England

"What's wrong? You told me to buy a BaBar for the garden"
"You deaf twat, I said Barbie"

11/06/19 11:25:48

 
Trace Sarge Vote score: 2427Trace Sarge

"Did you buy a hose to wash the car love?"..."Yeah sort of"

11/06/19 11:01:34

 
Lawrence Day Vote score: 446Lawrence Day

Where is Tarzan when you need him.

11/06/19 10:25:54

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 6681Mr Dome

I've never herd of such a thing

11/06/19 10:12:28

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 4244Dave Bryan

''He was born in India but he's always been a Rover.''

11/06/19 9:40:31

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9186Neil Mackenzie

The elephant was seen to smack it’s owner, it was arrested for Hannibal cruelty.

11/06/19 8:58:55

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 35939Welsh Rarebit

His bark is worse than his height

11/06/19 8:49:21

 
Spycenwolf  Vote score: 858Spycenwolf

The Republican party taking care of the housing problem.

11/06/19 8:18:15

 
James Lennox Vote score: 1991James Lennox

Elephant Man's Best Friend.

(nod to 8:01:53)

11/06/19 8:09:25

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 5625Hercules Rockefeller

"I thought Trump left already?"

11/06/19 8:05:22

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 4244Dave Bryan

''Dog my arse! That's a load of bull.''

11/06/19 9:12:09

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 6681Mr Dome

The problem is Fido just wants to piss against the trunk

11/06/19 9:00:24

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 35939Welsh Rarebit

You're barking up the wrong tree.

11/06/19 8:49:59

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 5697Chris Keegan

Silly bug*er couldn't spell Ellyfant.

11/06/19 8:23:15

 
John Llamas Vote score: 19758John Llamas

“Awwwwh ....... is that one outside Mary’s new boyfriends house? ... he sounds like a real keeper”

11/06/19 8:19:20

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 4244Dave Bryan

''He's the best gardener I've ever had and he doesn't charge.''

11/06/19 8:17:35

 
Spycenwolf  Vote score: 858Spycenwolf

"Quick, come into the house while the dog is distracted with the giant bones."

11/06/19 8:15:08

 
stone face Vote score: 4248stone face

"We often have a whole herd of elephants in the garden.
And it's only a small garden, it's amazing how we pachyderm in."

11/06/19 8:14:49

 
stone face Vote score: 4248stone face

"So that's when we decided to get rid of the guard dog and buy a mouse."

11/06/19 8:12:15

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 2988Stephen Bean

"His owner's barking mad."

11/06/19 8:09:32

 
stone face Vote score: 4248stone face

You'd have to be a right Dumbo to climb over that fence.

11/06/19 8:07:28

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 143Willie Johnson

There's a "private residence" inside the elephant's arse?

11/06/19 8:05:36

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 2988Stephen Bean

"He broke the postman's leg last week trying to hump it."

11/06/19 8:04:59

 
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