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Zak Toby1998 Vote score: 533Zak Toby1998

"Shit, I keep forgetting i'm gay"

09/06/19 7:27:52

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It helps to tie a string around your digit. --Scrappy Doo
Stephen Bean Vote score: 6485Stephen Bean

"Sh*t, what a time for the batteries in my xray glasses to run out."

09/06/19 7:01:49

 
Mark England Vote score: 15772Mark England

"Look at her American shorts. I'd love to Yank em off"

09/06/19 9:47:40

 
larry G. Vote score: 1417larry G.

"Damn pigeons!"

09/06/19 15:02:58

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 970Willie Johnson

"Whoever said I can't walk and chew gum at the same time was wrong."
"Wait, I forgot the gum."

09/06/19 9:23:10

 
Molly R Vote score: 1391Molly R

"Clark, honey? Can you just fly down and rescue me from all these ugly people?"

09/06/19 7:39:50

 
stone face Vote score: 6574stone face

"Oh shit, should I take my glasses off to get a better glimpse of that arse, and risk killing hundreds." Another everyday dilemma for X-Men's Cyclops.

09/06/19 7:08:02

 
larry G. Vote score: 1417larry G.

"Honey, some creep with a headache is trailing me."

09/06/19 19:23:05

 
larry G. Vote score: 1417larry G.

"Oh no, I can't believe I just bought another checkered shirt."

09/06/19 15:09:06

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9792Neil Mackenzie

Where did she get those shorts?
Hold on Alaska.

09/06/19 11:39:13

 
Poxy Jock Vote score: 82Poxy Jock

36-24-48

09/06/19 21:29:48

 
Sean Westwood Sean Westwood

Omg shes on the phone to MY dentist!!!

09/06/19 15:14:43

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19860John Glover

"Yes doll, I swiped your hat back, looks like I got his toupee as well."

09/06/19 12:03:30

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9792Neil Mackenzie

Rob regretted saying out loud: Wow her bum looks good in stripes! His girl friend hit him and now he’s only seeing stars.

09/06/19 11:37:49

 
Scrappy Doo Vote score: 1656Scrappy Doo

Show respect by rising for the flag.

09/06/19 10:48:43

 
Scrappy Doo Vote score: 1656Scrappy Doo

I'd like to invade her Falkland Islands.

09/06/19 10:46:07

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8100Chris Keegan

Tom was struggling, but he eventually came from behind.

09/06/19 10:14:41

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 970Willie Johnson

She was beginning to wonder why her boyfriend couldn't take his hand off his head.

09/06/19 8:58:21

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 6179Hercules Rockefeller

"Wow, what an Ameri-can!"

09/06/19 8:56:50

 
D C Vote score: 2689D C

Sharon could see Terry was a big Bush fan.

09/06/19 8:44:13

 
Trace Sarge Vote score: 2538Trace Sarge

If only he still looked at me that way...but a leopard cannot change her spot.

09/06/19 8:43:50

 
D C Vote score: 2689D C

Ryan wanted to take a constitutional.

09/06/19 8:29:02

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 10205Vanessa the Guesser

If you're being followed by a lumberjack then it's time to call the copse.

09/06/19 8:24:41

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 30576Tony Edwards

"Her bum looks big in those."

09/06/19 7:54:16

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 21270Ian Skelding

"Sorry, I'm not really the right sort of person for this sort of thing so ... jump."

09/06/19 7:40:45

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6070Glyn Evans

"...and with one dollop of Swish Hair Gel, Seth is transformed into Mr Sexy Hair Gel Man. The results are inevitable - Lydia watches as two window cleaners lark about on their scaffolding, whilst Nadia considers with the weather, that maybe she should have worn shorts today. You've witnessed it here folks! - The all powerful potent effect of Swish Hair Gel!"

09/06/19 7:33:26

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22566Michael Winner

"Oh no! What are the odds that a photographer would be present, with his equipment set up and ready, taking a picture of us at the exact moment that I'm recreating the 'jealous girlfriend' meme?"

09/06/19 7:33:25

 
Zak Toby1998 Vote score: 533Zak Toby1998

"AND some crazy bitch stuck her fingers together!"

09/06/19 7:33:23

 
Zak Toby1998 Vote score: 533Zak Toby1998

"Hmm yeah so there was this guy in the hardware store trying out the new superglue and he stuck his hand to his head!"

09/06/19 7:31:36

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 7094Dave Bryan

''My rabbit died this morning. As a mark of respect the flag should be lowered.''

09/06/19 7:29:34

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 6485Stephen Bean

Kentucky Spied Chick

09/06/19 7:22:31

 
stone face Vote score: 6574stone face

"So I said to my mother, you can stay for two weeks. Jim will fix up the spare room and pick you up from the airport...are you even listening to me Jim?"
"Yeah..Yeah."
"You really seem to have a short attention today." ."

09/06/19 7:21:13

 
Spycenwolf  Vote score: 874Spycenwolf

Tony simply had to stop to doff his imaginary cap as a sign of respect to the American slag.

09/06/19 7:16:04

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38708Welsh Rarebit

Stares and Stripes

09/06/19 7:10:33

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 7094Dave Bryan

''Are there only 42 American states?''
''I think they ran out of material.''

09/06/19 7:07:35

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 13976Dan Nicholls

"Oh no, we need to go to the dry cleaners."
"You gotta pick something up?"
"Nope, these jeans suddenly need cleaning."

09/06/19 7:03:51

 
James Lennox Vote score: 4369James Lennox

Make America gyrate again.

09/06/19 7:01:10

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 6485Stephen Bean

American Beauty

09/06/19 7:14:52

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 8496Mr Dome

She leaves men having to cover up erections wherever she goes

09/06/19 7:12:34

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 8496Mr Dome

Hmmm what I would do to that ass, thought Cindy

09/06/19 7:11:50

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 13976Dan Nicholls

Arse n stripes

09/06/19 7:01:47

 
James Lennox Vote score: 4369James Lennox

"Oh shit, that reminds me, we forgot to get K-Y Jelly."

09/06/19 7:00:31

 
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