"Aww come on Maureen, it's not every day you turn 100"

05/07/12 10:12:20

Ooh Terry, you've really come out of your shell.

05/07/12 10:00:57

Peter certainly wasn't suffering from a reptile dysfunction.

05/07/12 10:00:17

Hey, get off Michelle."

05/07/12 10:09:38

Have you any idea how many rocks I had to shag before I found you?

05/07/12 10:06:34

Armour Sutra.

05/07/12 11:20:44

Slow humps ahead

05/07/12 10:00:15

A quickie?........You must be joking.

05/07/12 10:17:01

Terry pinned

05/07/12 10:09:22

"Hurry up Roger, I need to feed the kids in 3 hours."

05/07/12 10:00:17

Deirdre prefered the Hare - he was fast and furious but never came first.

05/07/12 13:09:11

Tortoise Interruptus

05/07/12 13:50:29

She was a fine piece of taut ass

05/07/12 21:06:43

I thought Caption.me only allowed photos not videos..

05/07/12 17:13:56

she was a bit shell shocked

05/07/12 15:23:54

"Oh Yes! Slow and hard."

05/07/12 11:00:18

Turtally Addicted to Love

05/07/12 13:15:56

Turtle whacks.

05/07/12 10:53:56

It's highly unusual for both partners to wear protection.

05/07/12 10:21:41

Want to know what the soundtrack on Tortoise Porno sounds like?
Take one of your old Barry White singles and play on 33-1/3 speed.

05/07/12 10:18:25

And that's why they called it 'Blue Peter'.

05/07/12 10:16:59

Sometimes all the chasing pays off.

05/07/12 10:05:49

"I managed to walk into town and get those condoms. By the way, people are saying Margaret Thatcher has just resigned!"

05/07/12 12:56:11

"Ooh, where'd you learn that position?"

"My ex tortoise."

05/07/12 12:49:17

Turtley devoted.

05/07/12 10:55:21

"And here you see safe sex using the barrier method"

05/07/12 10:23:22