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"My girlfriend is 4'11" and likes to dress up in full body mouse costumes, yet, somehow, I'm the weirdo? Story of my bloody life," lamented Dave.

01/05/22 8:13:24

I find this photo really disturbing. That ratio of stone to mortar is totally unacceptable. Bloody rookie stonemasons.

01/05/22 8:09:20

He went with mouse girl because he was hung like a hamster.

01/05/22 8:14:22

Scientist Dave, has always had ethical questions about his experiments, with the white lab mice.

01/05/22 8:57:58

Are you a man or a mouse?

01/05/22 8:27:21

There's some weird stuff in Toys 'R' Rus.

01/05/22 8:00:52

"I'm waiting for the ambulance now, when my partner said he'd set the traps, I didn't realise he meant in every mousehole."

01/05/22 14:55:11

"Say cheeese!"

01/05/22 8:59:01

Well you don’t look at the mantelpiece when you’re poking the fire.

01/05/22 8:12:56

Stephen Bean uses his winnings to treat himself to an escort.

01/05/22 8:01:20

Davies £1000 love-doll from Wish was sold as 'Ultra real, sensuous bear skin feel'.

01/05/22 8:01:04

He earns a bit of extra cash looking after the neighbours' rug rat.

01/05/22 9:58:23

Ted was a poor lost wee soul after Ralph died.

01/05/22 8:14:03

"Why did you become an escort?" asked Daryl.

"The money's better" replied Danger Mouse.

01/05/22 8:12:35

More evidence of 70s TV presenter' sex scandals as previously
unseen pictures emerge of Yoffy

01/05/22 8:08:10

Mousehusband

01/05/22 8:05:36

Puppet master... bater.

01/05/22 8:01:59