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Q) Whats the difference between a postman and a captioneer?  A) A postman only posts it once.
Q) Whats the difference between a postman and a captioneer?  A) A postman only posts it once. photo | portfolio
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Dave Bryan Vote score: 17972Dave Bryan

Q) What's the difference between a postman and a captioneer?

A) A postman only posts it once.

11/11/21 12:05:38

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 22101Troompa Loompa

Oscar Postorius

11/11/21 12:03:42

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 11182Chris Keegan

“So you must be the new postman?”
- “Yes madam, they highered me last week”

11/11/21 12:00:36

 
The Wolf Vote score: 14217The Wolf

"Thanks for my daughter's birthday card, Mr Postman. It's a shame you couldn't have given it to her directly but she's always upstairs having a shower at this time of day."

11/11/21 12:10:30

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 12401Neil Mackenzie

Royal Mail deny allegations that they are short staffed.

11/11/21 17:07:18

 
Al Overy Vote score: 9010Al Overy

"Urgent post for you from The Institute for the Study of Rising Sea Levels, Mrs Smith."

"Oh. Any idea what they might want?"

"Erm..."

11/11/21 12:00:13

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 26653Ian Skelding

Postie loses Court case on the grounds that in normal circumstances the Javelin would have missed him.

11/11/21 12:44:11

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 11182Chris Keegan

“Here you go love, I’m afraid it’s a summons from the High Court”

11/11/21 12:15:42

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 3994Mark Wilson

"Thank you Madam, I dropped that letter 2 hours ago and nobody would pick it up for me"

11/11/21 17:58:31

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 12755Mr Dome

- Thanks postie. I think I know your kin. What's your father called?
- Rumpel

11/11/21 12:37:27

 
James Lennox Vote score: 9836James Lennox

"Here's £20, Tina. Oral please, and this time no excuses about your dodgy knees."

11/11/21 12:11:52

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 8892Hercules Rockefeller

♪ I'm stilt standing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. ♪

11/11/21 12:01:24

 
Barrie Bullock Vote score: 764Barrie Bullock

Give me the fiver before I give you the blow job.

11/11/21 14:45:34

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 34791Tony Edwards

Postsman

11/11/21 12:54:54

 
The Wolf Vote score: 14217The Wolf

"My p45? But why am I being fired from 'People who are always on stilts Ltd'?"

11/11/21 12:33:43

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 12755Mr Dome

The floods are a comin'

11/11/21 12:31:42

 
Molly R Vote score: 3185Molly R

"Thank you for socially distancing. Can I offer you some hand sanitizer?"

11/11/21 12:01:16

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 11182Chris Keegan

“Well that’s just typical Mrs Jones, the very day I come prepared and Rex is at the vet”

11/11/21 12:00:10

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 4326Scrijjy Doo

"Finally, my copy of High Times."

11/11/21 14:34:13

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 8558Vivvy En

"Perhaps you could collect your mail from the Office when in town, Mrs Fotherington. I really don't like delivering out in the sticks."

11/11/21 14:27:32

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 25472Michael Winner

He was later fired for his bad altitude.

11/11/21 13:20:30

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 16387Dan Nicholls

I see stamps are going up again...

11/11/21 12:37:05

 
C CaMel Vote score: 8047C CaMel

He delivers a full sack everyday, you have to hand it to him.

11/11/21 12:23:18

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 34791Tony Edwards

Upper class post

11/11/21 12:15:54

 
Al Overy Vote score: 9010Al Overy

These hand-me-down addresses were starting to wear thin.

11/11/21 12:13:05

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 1512alexandra ball

I'm now post master general, I got a raise.

11/11/21 12:02:27

 
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