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Clive Dunny
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Troompa Loompa Vote score: 20297Troompa Loompa

Clive Dunny

04/04/21 8:51:26

 1
The Dads Army commemorative range also contains the phrases ... they don't like it up em,fuzzy worries,we're doomed,stupid boy,mum won't like it uncle Arthur, do you think that's wise sir and many many more  --Tony S
Mark England Vote score: 17962Mark England

"I've tried installing a bidet, Captain Mainwairing, but they don't like it up em"

04/04/21 9:04:45

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 14015Dave Bryan

''Don't panic! We still have 500 rolls left in the loft.''

04/04/21 8:09:40

 
Al Overy Vote score: 4775Al Overy

Sewer-side note

04/04/21 8:08:24

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 7932Hercules Rockefeller

The Restroom at the End of the Universe

04/04/21 8:07:56

 
Ryan French Vote score: 19Ryan French

Don't Panic use a towel.

04/04/21 14:33:06

 
Stephen Paterson Vote score: 3448Stephen Paterson

Juan Sheet had plenty of explaining to do.

04/04/21 8:49:39

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 7433Vivvy En

(March 2020)
Gone shopping. I may be a while.

04/04/21 16:14:15

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 24475Ian Skelding

That should sort out your consternation.

04/04/21 8:17:36

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 5629Karyn Harrison

Toilet humour

04/04/21 8:06:36

 
Molly R Vote score: 2639Molly R

No shit, Sherlock.

04/04/21 8:01:54

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 15600Stephen Bean

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Lavatory

04/04/21 8:00:09

 

Hellooooooooooo still sat here waiting for one of the captioners to bring me toilet roll. I can't feel my legs......

Mon 14:03:04

 
SHA SHA Vote score: 194SHA SHA

You're in Europe... bidets are commonplace here and legistlated in several countries.

05/04/21 1:42:09

 
Lady Scotland Lady Scotland

It wasn't the lack of loo roll that shocked Sharon about her friend Joanne's loo. It was the dirty great skidmark down the cistern.

04/04/21 15:01:56

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2789Mark Wilson

Consonant please Rachel, and another, and a bowel

04/04/21 12:52:28

 
Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 828Ellen Duncalf

“Your hand is perfectly adequate.”

04/04/21 11:29:43

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11707Neil Mackenzie

The Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything including how many toilet roll sheets you need is 42.

04/04/21 11:10:47

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11707Neil Mackenzie

Any which wipe but loos.

04/04/21 11:07:10

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11707Neil Mackenzie

There is a pay per sheet machine. A pound each but it takes credit cards.

04/04/21 11:01:44

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 2534Willie Johnson

Way ahead of you. I've already pooped in my pants.

04/04/21 10:34:17

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 5188Lucky Elperro

EU ministers responsible for vaccine rollout advised not to all use the same bathroom.

04/04/21 10:25:04

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2789Mark Wilson

... but it's Easter Sunday, all the supermarkets are closed and the local shop doesn't do the quilted toilet roll

04/04/21 9:42:16

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 20297Troompa Loompa

🎵 You gotta roll with it....🎵

04/04/21 9:01:33

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 20297Troompa Loompa

Just relaxative.

04/04/21 8:58:00

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 11449Mr Dome

Just bog off

04/04/21 8:53:42

 
The Wolf Vote score: 11782The Wolf

"I wish Lance Corporal Jones would stay out of my bathroom"...said Captain Mainwaring

04/04/21 8:49:28

 
Chris Halliwell Vote score: 5326Chris Halliwell

I wasn't panicking, I was sh*tting myself!

04/04/21 8:41:25

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 14015Dave Bryan

Don't panic! It's only turbulence. Remain seated until the stewardess arrives.

04/04/21 8:40:41

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 7796Glyn Evans

Yeah, don't panic. Realise the roll is nearly done before you sit on the toilet and get another. It's not magic.

04/04/21 8:37:02

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 24475Ian Skelding

Loo Read

04/04/21 8:34:07

 3
Must be Velvet. --Karyn Harrison
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14731Vanessa the Guesser

And don't get in a flap..

04/04/21 8:32:06

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 1103alexandra ball

The sink is within reach.

04/04/21 8:31:58

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 11449Mr Dome

Happy B'day

04/04/21 8:29:33

 
Dot Old Vote score: 1468Dot Old

"... I'll catch the Andrex puppy."

04/04/21 8:16:50

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14731Vanessa the Guesser

When will this turd lockdown end?

04/04/21 8:08:02

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 5629Karyn Harrison

The writing's on the roll.

04/04/21 8:05:49

 
Al Overy Vote score: 4775Al Overy

The supporting roll

04/04/21 8:01:06

 
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