"If you were 'at your desk all morning', Mildred, how do explain this battered courgette next to an open copy of Lady Chatterley's Lover?"

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"If you were 'at your desk all morning', Mildred, how do explain this battered courgette next to an open copy of Lady Chatterley's Lover?"
Nod to the other 'Mildred'. What are the chances? Guess she has that look.
12:03pm
"If you were 'at your desk all morning', Mildred, how do (you) explain this..."
"I was researching your sex life, okay?"
6:45pm
"That's not batter... ewwwww!"
8:57am