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How much do the council pay you for doing this job?  What council?
How much do the council pay you for doing this job?  What council? photo | portfolio
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Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

''How much do the council pay you for doing this job?''

''What council?''

14/02/21 8:26:00

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

''I better check the other thigh just for good measure.''

14/02/21 8:08:20

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 33414Tony Edwards

John Le Mesurier

14/02/21 9:31:25

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

''Your swimsuit is too short to be worn in a family bathing area. You'll have to take it off.''

14/02/21 8:03:08

 
Molly R Vote score: 2503Molly R

See level

14/02/21 8:01:45

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

Unearthed..An early Victorian sex tape

14/02/21 8:04:27

 
Tony S Vote score: 681Tony S

The Beach boys want to tape California girls.

14/02/21 8:26:08

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14630Stephen Bean

"I'm fining you for having 7 inches between your costume and your knee."

"You can't blame a lady for wanting more than 6 inches."

14/02/21 8:25:56

 
Al Overy Vote score: 3720Al Overy

"Yep. Jellyfish sting, miss. I will need to pee on you. Then you can go and get treated for the jellyfish sting."

14/02/21 8:01:17

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

The thighs the limit..

14/02/21 8:00:31

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5283Kenny Ireland

"Are you sure we have to be measured for deckchairs?"

15/02/21 3:47:18

 
Tony S Vote score: 681Tony S

Hilda didn't need her 5 years at medical school to tell her he was about to have a stroke

14/02/21 8:08:15

 1
Or "she was about to have a stroke". --Willie Johnson
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14630Stephen Bean

"I'm afraid costumes like yours are only allowed at thigh tide."

14/02/21 8:00:49

 
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

"Yes Sir, everyone knows pee helps with jellyfish stings. Of course we will pee on you, if it helps... but how did the jellyfish sting you inside your mouth?"

14/02/21 13:49:03

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2436Mark Wilson

"Have you ever judged the long jump competition before?"

14/02/21 10:58:39

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11495Neil Mackenzie

Is that Colin Kaepernick’s Dad?

14/02/21 8:44:37

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14630Stephen Bean

"Sorry Madam, my pet ragworm seems to have taken a liking to you. I'll have him off you in a jiffy. Right after I detach his teeth."

14/02/21 8:05:01

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23773Michael Winner

Maureen Peters, winner of the 1913 Knobbly Thigh contest.

15/02/21 9:15:43

 
Stephen Paterson Vote score: 3376Stephen Paterson

Ahem!

14/02/21 18:35:58

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 860Charles Gilbert

"It's white and gold."

"No it's clearly blue and black are you blind?"

14/02/21 17:34:47

 
Barrie Bullock Vote score: 678Barrie Bullock

Measuring the flappers.

14/02/21 14:35:46

 1
Meet the Floppers --Scrijjy Doo
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

England 2023 : Bay Watch Sharia

14/02/21 12:08:32

 
Endeavour 2 Persevere Vote score: 110Endeavour 2 Persevere

Before accepting his marriage proposal, Mildred needed to know how much she'd be letting herself in for.

14/02/21 10:04:26

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 990alexandra ball

Get your filthy paws off my silky drawers

14/02/21 9:27:53

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 2346Willie Johnson

It was measuring that other half of the length of that thigh that got him into trouble.

14/02/21 9:26:58

 
James Lennox Vote score: 7588James Lennox

It wasn't the best job for someone with a spontaneous erection disorder and a 2 foot long penis, but Dave managed by hiding it up the back of his trousers ... "Damn it sonny, get your hand off that!"

14/02/21 8:45:15

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 24010Ian Skelding

"That groyne is nearly fully exposed and he can't keep his hands off it."

14/02/21 8:15:56

 
James Lennox Vote score: 7588James Lennox

"It looks like you have a 6 inch gap needs filling. I might be able to help."

14/02/21 8:15:07

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14259Vanessa the Guesser

"You say it was like this yesterday? I think it's a case of Saturday Night Femur."

14/02/21 8:05:11

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14630Stephen Bean

Young Harvey Weinstein looked on as his father taught him how being in a position of authority made it ok to fondle the thighs of any woman he wanted.

14/02/21 8:03:09

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

COMING SOON TO A CINEMA IN YOUR AREA: Douglas Wader in 'Reach For The Thigh'.

14/02/21 8:01:37

 
Al Overy Vote score: 3720Al Overy

Ted felt uncomfortable. He always did when he was touching cloth.

14/02/21 8:00:17

 
Al Overy Vote score: 3720Al Overy

"I'm going to measure you carefully, Mrs Batty, because the last thing we want is stockings that fall down for the rest of your life."

14/02/21 8:00:09

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3231Scrijjy Doo

Hers was bigger so now she's sheriff.

15/02/21 0:35:47

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 860Charles Gilbert

We kneed this.

14/02/21 17:33:40

 
Leeds Baggie Vote score: 30Leeds Baggie

What are you doing!

My legs are longer than hers

14/02/21 16:56:51

 
John  Glover Vote score: 21297John Glover

" Knees up, mother Brown."

14/02/21 14:35:38

 
Mauris Iocus Vote score: 323Mauris Iocus

"Measuring, measuring, Left Thigh, Right Thigh, Left Thigh, Right Thigh... all day long, it's just Exhausting! But... I really do love my in-between work.

14/02/21 12:11:36

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 7142Vivvy En

The search for actresses was underway for a pilot TV drama about lifeguards.
-Hire?
-Yes. Higher...

14/02/21 10:54:08

 
Peter Houle Vote score: 268Peter Houle

sand crab

14/02/21 10:27:23

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 7636Hercules Rockefeller

"Sorry, ladies, but only bare ankles are allowed on this beach."

14/02/21 8:21:32

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

Kneesy does it.

14/02/21 8:09:33

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14259Vanessa the Guesser

"Mister, what's this hard wood doing in your trousers?"

14/02/21 8:02:03

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

Costume drama.

14/02/21 8:01:44

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 7534Glyn Evans

"That won't do, this is a nudist beach and this level of nudity really isn't acceptable"

14/02/21 8:01:40

 
Al Overy Vote score: 3720Al Overy

"I once knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith."

"Really? What was the name of his other leg?"

14/02/21 8:00:47

 
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