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While grandad was out fighting the Nazis what did you do during the war Granny?
While grandad was out fighting the Nazis what did you do during the war Granny? photo | portfolio
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Tony S Vote score: 681Tony S

While grandad was out fighting the Nazi's what did you do during the war Granny?

10/02/21 8:08:55

 1
When she wasn't catastrophising she was apostrophising..... --Gavin Smithers
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

ANTIQUES ROAD SHOW: MARY SHOWS OFF HER BOTTLE COLLECTION

''Some of these bottles are very rare. They have small amounts of wine left in the bottom of them.''

10/02/21 8:23:25

 1
The ones with monkey piss are more common. --Willie Johnson
The Wolf Vote score: 10785The Wolf

Doris had just done dry January, but she was definitely making up for it in February.

10/02/21 9:01:18

 
Al Overy Vote score: 3720Al Overy

There was a young lady from Tyne
Who drank fifty bottles of wine
She was still in action
So appeared in a caption
Saying 'I feel absholutely fine!'

10/02/21 10:05:21

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2436Mark Wilson

As lockdown Birthday parties go, Janet's was a success. Pity she couldn't invite anybody else.

10/02/21 9:22:30

 
Endeavour 2 Persevere Vote score: 110Endeavour 2 Persevere

Princess Margaret - The Early Years

10/02/21 8:49:09

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

''She won't throw any of them away for sedimental reasons.''

10/02/21 8:04:59

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14259Vanessa the Guesser

Sting would be waiting decades before he got a reply.

10/02/21 8:03:06

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

''We need to go to the recycling centre, darling.''

''OK, I'll log on to the caption site.''

10/02/21 8:42:18

 1
Hah! Wow, best of the day! Alas, I have only one vote. --Mauris Iocus
Glyn Evans Vote score: 7534Glyn Evans

The castaway's switchboard is overwhelmed this Christmas.

10/02/21 8:22:14

 
Al Overy Vote score: 3720Al Overy

With no ladies' room at the recycling centre, Trinny was going to have to improvise.

10/02/21 8:00:31

 
Fozzgog B. Vote score: 493Fozzgog B.

"Yes I am dating Oliver Reed - how on earth did you know?"

10/02/21 21:22:49

 
Joe Vote score: 1653Joe

Jeanie and the bottle

10/02/21 19:11:49

 1
"I d-d-dream.. shrrrllggh... I d-dreammm... ohhh... FFF! .. ssshhwgggllrrr... morrrre BOOOOOOOZE!!!" --Mauris Iocus
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 1932Karen Oakenfull

Bette was continually told that the answer to her problems wasn’t at the bottom of a bottle....but she liked to check anyway.

(Take on an old joke)

10/02/21 15:09:32

 
Leeds Baggie Vote score: 30Leeds Baggie

Betty had the wall, but finding 10 green bottles proved difficult

10/02/21 12:36:35

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

"Finally after three thousand bottles, a matching pair I like for the mantlepiece."

10/02/21 9:26:34

 
James Lennox Vote score: 7588James Lennox

Schindler's Pissed

10/02/21 8:35:24

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14630Stephen Bean

Bouteille is in the eye of the beholder

10/02/21 8:31:51

 
Dot Old Vote score: 1382Dot Old

She just chianti stay off the bottle

10/02/21 8:07:57

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 10304Chris Keegan

While working from home it remains important to check for any messages

10/02/21 9:32:56

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 5150Stu Dent

Banking from home

10/02/21 8:49:34

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11495Neil Mackenzie

Here’s a picture of Nan topless.

10/02/21 8:40:52

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14259Vanessa the Guesser

For Dorothy most of the Depression really had been Great.

10/02/21 8:31:50

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

''I'm sure these bottles are getting smaller.''

10/02/21 8:06:54

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 24010Ian Skelding

"That is one glassy lady."

10/02/21 8:05:32

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 11082Mr Dome

The dregs of society

10/02/21 8:04:55

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 7636Hercules Rockefeller

"Listen, Mildred, I think it's time we had a chat about your drinking problem."

10/02/21 8:01:15

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 427Gavin Smithers

It was a normal Saturday at St Trinians but two bottles of rose was a sure sign that there was a lesbian in their midst.

10/02/21 20:58:21

 1
But don't lesbians always want to get in their "midst?" --Mauris Iocus
Willie Johnson Vote score: 2346Willie Johnson

Somebody bottle lot of wine (and drank a lot too).

10/02/21 18:35:21

 
Stephen Paterson Vote score: 3376Stephen Paterson

Just like the monks, one Glaswegian knew how to make a Buck fast.

10/02/21 17:34:57

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3231Scrijjy Doo

Alice knew she had a problem when she started hanging out at recycling plants.

10/02/21 16:01:48

 
John  Glover Vote score: 21297John Glover

"Now here's something one can thank the Italians for. A cute little rafia handle to enable one to hang the bottle on one of our oak, tudor beams."

10/02/21 13:30:56

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14630Stephen Bean

After the 'Ten green bottles standing on a wall' appreciation society had its annual meeting there was usually a lot of clearing up to be done.

10/02/21 12:47:11

 1
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14630Stephen Bean

During WW2 most bottle banks were turned into tanks.

10/02/21 12:35:49

 
Peter Houle Vote score: 268Peter Houle

Now there's a nice pair.

10/02/21 10:28:09

 
Paul Reeve Vote score: 5824Paul Reeve

“Oh no, some bastard has nicked my recycling bin.”

10/02/21 10:14:14

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 7142Vivvy En

Ivy was thinking fast. Could she get rich quick by conning the Alpine pop man?

10/02/21 10:06:45

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 33414Tony Edwards

Sarah enjoyed nothing better than visiting her local bottle bank for a game of snap.

10/02/21 10:01:45

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

"Well the government said I'd have to start working from home."

"And what is it you do?"

"Am a professional alcoholic."

10/02/21 9:00:12

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

BBC launches its new daytime show..Homes Under The Hammered.

10/02/21 8:57:57

 
James Lennox Vote score: 7588James Lennox

"That f*cking genie had better be in one of these two."

10/02/21 8:55:54

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 10304Chris Keegan

She's got some bottle

10/02/21 8:54:51

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

''What virus?''

10/02/21 8:38:27

 
Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 657Ellen Duncalf

It’s been one heckuva lockdown but thank goodness for “3 bottles of wine for a tenner” in Asda.

10/02/21 8:37:44

 1
She'd probably be pickled if she found out they're even cheaper at Lidl. --Mauris Iocus
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13169Dave Bryan

''Darling, go down to the supermarket and get some more wine. We're running on empties.''

10/02/21 8:18:06

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 24010Ian Skelding

It all started with Sarah Moore's grandmother making hundreds of bloody lamps.

10/02/21 8:15:15

 
stone face Vote score: 8729stone face

Working from home saw a serious change in Mrs Smiths alcohol consumption. The headmistress found herself drinking one bottle of wine every morning. Instead of the usual two she had in the school.

10/02/21 8:13:22

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 11082Mr Dome

She gives me a Semillon

10/02/21 8:10:02

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 11082Mr Dome

Un booty de vin rouge

10/02/21 8:05:49

 
Tony S Vote score: 681Tony S

I remember the episode when Mum was on Cash in the Attic

10/02/21 8:05:25

 
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