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Joe was blind but he knew his wife had took her knickers off.
Joe was blind but he knew his wife had took her knickers off. photo | portfolio
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Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11197Neil Mackenzie

Joe was blind but he knew his wife had took her knickers off.

14/11/20 9:18:05

 
Al Overy Vote score: 2066Al Overy

"These are British caught, sir. They are lightly simmered in resentment and served with small island mentality dressing and a side order of entitlement."

14/11/20 8:00:52

 3
fo --Lucky Elperro
Stephen Bean Vote score: 13030Stephen Bean

"Ok lads, remember the plan. As soon as the waiter's gone, we stop playing dead, overpower them and head for the sea. There's only two of them and seven of us. Oh, and well done Langou and Stine for jumping out of the pan and turning off the gas."

14/11/20 9:52:13

 1
James Lennox Vote score: 6714James Lennox

"Thank-you waiter, and my wife would like you to give her crabs."

14/11/20 8:53:52

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13599Vanessa the Guesser

On date night Dave realised he had pulled a mussel.

14/11/20 8:16:01

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1988Willie Johnson

"I hate these cockroaches. Look what they've done to my steak."

14/11/20 10:35:59

 
The Wolf Vote score: 9316The Wolf

I hope that smell is the food...thought Dave as he sat down for his first date with Tina.

14/11/20 8:51:54

 
Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 368Ellen Duncalf

Dev had a dodgy tummy after last nights party so when he saw the giant sea food platter arrive he was a crushedasian.

14/11/20 8:20:57

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 811alexandra ball

Dave regretted not telling her he's a vegetarian and letting her choose the restaurant.

14/11/20 12:02:03

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 1823Karen Oakenfull

Mo can barely wait for his wife’s starter to arrive so he can get tucked in.

14/11/20 11:04:09

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10513Mr Dome

The hand of cod

14/11/20 8:51:41

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 12064Dave Bryan

''On second thoughts, I'll have a curry.''

14/11/20 8:26:47

 1
"That's not the way to curry flavor with me." --Willie Johnson
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 7228Hercules Rockefeller

Shrimpin' ain't easy

14/11/20 8:25:53

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2910Scrijjy Doo

Not as good as Red Lobster, Dead Lobster.

14/11/20 17:31:34

 
John  Glover Vote score: 21087John Glover

"Got any 'Wotsits'?"

14/11/20 14:11:27

 
Barrie Bullock Vote score: 642Barrie Bullock

start on tier three & work our way down.

14/11/20 14:05:53

 
John  Glover Vote score: 21087John Glover

"Ah, lemon slices, my favourite."

14/11/20 12:48:37

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32856Tony Edwards

Shell-shocked

14/11/20 10:15:13

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 13030Stephen Bean

No-one is sure how the flock of seagulls got into the restaurant. Police have it from an Anon source that a captioneer opened a window shortly after this photo was taken, in an attempt to make it easier to caption.

14/11/20 10:03:22

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 23332Ian Skelding

"Langoustine Sir?"
"No I'm not, I'm hopeless with different languages."

14/11/20 9:55:29

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32856Tony Edwards

Sajid always goes for the top-shelf.

14/11/20 9:44:59

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5061Kenny Ireland

"I will ask if I can pay with an oyster".

14/11/20 9:36:36

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10513Mr Dome

Raj was having and affair and as he sat down with his wife, he was thankful the smell of fish masked his own aroma as his lips weren't the only ones he'd licked that afternoon

14/11/20 9:02:50

 
Mark England Vote score: 17471Mark England

"She's gonna eat all that?" thought Dev. "I hope she leaves enough room for a small winkle later"

14/11/20 9:02:47

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 6718Vivvy En

"Let's start, shell we?"

14/11/20 9:02:02

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 7123Glyn Evans

Afternoon Sea

14/11/20 9:00:04

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10513Mr Dome

Sanjeev's English was not great and he shuddered at the thought of eating the big pink cocks and muscles

14/11/20 8:56:09

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 4692Stu Dent

Tiers before breadtime

14/11/20 8:53:22

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9840Chris Keegan

Poor Raj was allergic to shellfish but couldn't face the idea of another day with that wife of his.

14/11/20 8:44:41

 
Chris Halliwell Vote score: 5240Chris Halliwell

Mr. Singh from India looked dejected when his Seafood Platter arrived, in fact you could say he was a Crushed Asian.

14/11/20 8:38:04

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 12064Dave Bryan

''Have some shellfish, darling. You'll feel frisky later on.''

''I'll have less of your oyster sauce, thank you.''

14/11/20 8:21:57

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13599Vanessa the Guesser

Tour de France winner's all you can catch buffet.

14/11/20 8:20:30

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9840Chris Keegan

"But I ordered a sandwich"
- "Sir, all of these come from the finest sand which ones do you want?"

14/11/20 8:13:37

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9840Chris Keegan

It was when the food arrived Pete couldn't help but notice how much Greggs have have upped their game.

14/11/20 8:03:42

 
stone face Vote score: 8325stone face

We're on a seafood diet.. We see food , we eat it.

14/11/20 8:03:41

 
Molly R Vote score: 2267Molly R

"Excuse me, but we ordered the sustainable vegan Fruits by Mary."

14/11/20 8:03:00

 
stone face Vote score: 8325stone face

All this food is my wife's and she won't share.
She's always been a shellfish cow.

14/11/20 8:00:54

 
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