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"You should get that checked".
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Guideaux . Vote score: 2254Guideaux .

"You should get that checked".

23/10/20 7:31:02

 2
I much prefer "checked" - "chequered" would not carry the same pun. --Molly R
stone face Vote score: 8328stone face

"Yours is bigger and wider than mine, and much more hairier."

"It is isn't it... I got mine from Sporrans R Us."

23/10/20 7:07:06

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32884Tony Edwards

Laddie in Red

23/10/20 8:45:35

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13612Vanessa the Guesser

Stiff competition

23/10/20 7:00:20

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 832alexandra ball

Yours looks a bit off kilter.

23/10/20 13:05:11

 1
Or "out of kilter" maybe? --James Lennox
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 7238Hercules Rockefeller

"Ya know we were only messing with ya when we dared ya to pierce it, right?"

23/10/20 7:07:42

 
John  Glover Vote score: 21100John Glover

"OMG, yuck, so that's what a foreskin looks like."

24/10/20 2:01:34

 3
Hang on. Can we just pull this back a bit? --Mr Dome
The Wolf Vote score: 9379The Wolf

Knickerless urge on

23/10/20 8:08:44

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10535Mr Dome

Wee Scotsmen

23/10/20 7:06:52

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1998Willie Johnson

Welcoming a new member to the club.

23/10/20 20:22:54

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11214Neil Mackenzie

Two Scotsmen and Wayne Rooney struck up a conversation at the urinal.
What do you call yours?
I call my Willy, Johnson after he gave me my son John.
I call mine Mr Dome because of his big head. What do you call yours Wayne?
I call mine The Wolf, because he likes jumping in bed with Grandma.

23/10/20 7:58:43

 5
Controversial --Al Overy
Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 387Ellen Duncalf

Crude Crotch Clan.

23/10/20 7:33:42

 3
Hmmm..that was supposed to be a clown with a smiley face but has come out looking like Egyptian hieroglyphics.. --Ellen Duncalf
Stephen Bean Vote score: 13113Stephen Bean

Playing the fagpipes

23/10/20 7:30:54

 
Al Overy Vote score: 2134Al Overy

Kilty pleasures

23/10/20 7:20:21

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 13113Stephen Bean

Scots on the cocks

23/10/20 7:20:12

 2
Shaken not stirred. --Scrijjy Doo
stone face Vote score: 8328stone face

Arrested for indecent behaviour, the three Scots were found kilty as charged.

23/10/20 7:03:32

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13612Vanessa the Guesser

"Well hellooo Nessie!"

23/10/20 7:03:06

 
John  Glover Vote score: 21100John Glover

"You are in trouble mate, the red rings around ours are lipstick, the green ring around yours looks like gangrene."

23/10/20 11:40:32

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 6736Vivvy En

Skirting the issue

23/10/20 8:55:51

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5069Kenny Ireland

"We know that it is Susan's skirt but you did not have to wear her thong as well".

23/10/20 8:39:13

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5069Kenny Ireland

Nothing's worn beneath his kilt. (It's all in working order).

23/10/20 8:31:19

 
The Wolf Vote score: 9379The Wolf

"I can't believe you're wearing a red kilt, you said... Oh your red kilt looks so stupid, you said. Well, at least my red kilt comes fitted with a zip which helps when you're stood at the urinals. Now who is taking the piss?"

23/10/20 8:19:56

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 23349Ian Skelding

Scotch pissed

23/10/20 7:50:04

 
James Lennox Vote score: 6788James Lennox

The Scottish remake of Schindler's List was pretty much what you'd expect.

23/10/20 7:33:06

 
stone face Vote score: 8328stone face

It's from the Scottish lads mag 'Plaidboy'

23/10/20 7:32:26

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13612Vanessa the Guesser

"That's a nasty rash."

"Yeah, I got it from that tart, Ann."

23/10/20 7:21:13

 
stone face Vote score: 8328stone face

As the Highland Games start, three contestants take time to practice tossing the caber.

23/10/20 7:13:39

 
stone face Vote score: 8328stone face

"With a willy that small, how do you get all the gay dates you get? I mean, every fella I know is after a night with you."

"I play the bagpipes."

23/10/20 7:10:47

 
Ross Davidson Vote score: 1724Ross Davidson

Biggie in the middle

25/10/20 14:57:33

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1998Willie Johnson

The members welcome a new club.
(*Nod to 21:22:54)

24/10/20 21:11:36

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2003Mark Wilson

The 3 muskepeers

23/10/20 23:26:03

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 4260Crunchy Chords

Curiosity kilt the cads.

23/10/20 19:04:50

 
Eugene  Quill Vote score: 149Eugene Quill

"Och, so ye've come tae Braemar tae toss yer caber, Red Jock?"

23/10/20 18:59:36

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10535Mr Dome

Ha!! The jokes on you now because you said you wouldn't piss on me if I was on fire and look, you just pissed all down my leg- oh

23/10/20 14:11:56

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 6736Vivvy En

Three peers, dress up for a night, on the tiles

23/10/20 9:02:49

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 13113Stephen Bean

Get yer kilt off!

23/10/20 7:27:21

 
Al Overy Vote score: 2134Al Overy

Flock around the Jock.

23/10/20 7:26:13

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 7137Glyn Evans

"Who's idea was it to go on stage with "You can keep your hat on?" We're going to look ridiculous now - right who's going to fish them out?"

23/10/20 7:20:42

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13612Vanessa the Guesser

I think these three are having a fling.

23/10/20 7:13:53

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 13113Stephen Bean

Armitage Wanks

23/10/20 7:10:51

 
The Wolf Vote score: 9379The Wolf

"Don't worry guys, you're both funnier than me"

23/10/20 7:01:36

 
The Wolf Vote score: 9379The Wolf

"You should see a doctor, you're looking a bit red down there"

23/10/20 7:00:10

 
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