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"Can you tell me the quickest way to the loo, please?"  "Are you walking or driving?"  "Walking."  "Its quicker if you drive."
"Can you tell me the quickest way to the loo, please?"  "Are you walking or driving?"  "Walking."  "Its quicker if you drive." photo | portfolio
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Al Overy Vote score: 1618Al Overy

"Can you tell me the quickest way to the loo, please?"

"Are you walking or driving?"

"Walking."

"It's quicker if you drive."

20/09/20 8:04:47

 3
"Are you walking or driving?" "Skipping - 🎵 Skip, skip, skip to my lou". --Willie Johnson
The Wolf Vote score: 8753The Wolf

"I know this is a long shot, but by any chance are you a chiropractor?"

20/09/20 8:37:15

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 12272Stephen Bean

World staring champion Dave had finally met his match.

20/09/20 8:01:12

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 6507Vivvy En

"It's rude to read over someone's shoulder - so p!ss off"

20/09/20 9:38:28

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 12272Stephen Bean

"What made you so famous you got to be a statue?"

"I invented superglue. Trouble is, they used it to stick one of my shoes to the ground, two planks to my arse and now I'm a bloody bench."

20/09/20 9:36:16

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11812Dave Bryan

''Are you made of copper?''

''No, bronze.''

''Bloody typical, you can never find a copper when you want one.''

20/09/20 8:30:49

 
Mark England Vote score: 17413Mark England

"Excuse me mate. I was sitting there"

20/09/20 10:48:38

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11812Dave Bryan

''Would you like to go for a walk?''

''No thanks, I'm having a rust.''

20/09/20 8:08:14

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 7110Hercules Rockefeller

"I'm you. From the future."

20/09/20 8:01:06

 
Eugene  Quill Vote score: 68Eugene Quill

"As a former optician that's met a grisly fate in a bronze foundry, I would recommend that you get your eyes properly tested, Mr Cummings."

20/09/20 18:36:39

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6983Glyn Evans

This statue commemorates all of those people who died in the Great Toilet Paper Fights of early 2020. May they Flush in Peace.

20/09/20 8:30:02

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 12272Stephen Bean

"Why are you staring at me?"

"I can't help it. I'm in ore of you."

21/09/20 9:46:20

 1
alexandra ball Vote score: 735alexandra ball

Excuse me, have you seen a dog, brown with white patches, blue collar? Excuse me, hello, Rude!!!

20/09/20 10:56:19

 
Sheila  Graham Vote score: 313Sheila Graham

"Have you tried a different newspaper?"
"No, I'm too set in my ways."

20/09/20 9:52:27

 
Al Overy Vote score: 1618Al Overy

"Scuse me mate, have you seen Medus... ah!"

20/09/20 9:34:25

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 4549Stu Dent

Casting a shadow

20/09/20 9:34:00

 
The Wolf Vote score: 8753The Wolf

"Come on mate. Just one quick game of leapfrog and then I'll leave you alone to read"

20/09/20 8:27:28

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

Sam was so excited to finally meet a right leg end

20/09/20 8:12:54

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10271Mr Dome

Frozen in time, Dave loved his 70s detective look

20/09/20 8:10:49

 
Molly R Vote score: 2155Molly R

"It's not good enough just to point your fart away from me - go do it somewhere else."

20/09/20 8:02:57

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1883Willie Johnson

"Is that a pickle in your nose or are you just happy to see my handkerchief?"

20/09/20 23:37:26

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 1007Sam Cass

"Dad, you've come back! Did you ever get the milk?!"

20/09/20 15:25:03

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11068Neil Mackenzie

Should of gone to Specsavers.

20/09/20 11:07:36

 
Sheila  Graham Vote score: 313Sheila Graham

Paul McKenna's latest hypnotism subject is somewhat unresponsive.

20/09/20 10:48:08

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9472Chris Keegan

"Excuse me, do you realise that you're sitting on an unsafe bench?"
- "Will you kindly keep your politics to yourself!"

20/09/20 10:40:43

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11068Neil Mackenzie

Who had to get too close to notice I’m bald like you, but I don’t wear glasses so piss of four eyes.

20/09/20 10:25:54

 
Sheila  Graham Vote score: 313Sheila Graham

Despite the local candidate's best efforts, the voter remained unmoved.

20/09/20 10:18:20

 
Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 212Ellen Duncalf

”Yeah”.

20/09/20 9:33:10

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9472Chris Keegan

Apparently, in his day he was an absolute leg end.

20/09/20 8:50:20

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1883Willie Johnson

"You've got two nose hairs out of place. Doesn't that itch?"
"It does now."

20/09/20 8:41:21

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1883Willie Johnson

"What's that between your teeth? It looks like two dogs staring out at me."

20/09/20 8:39:47

 
Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 212Ellen Duncalf

All Sir Bertie Braithwaite wants to do is rust in peace but some weird stalker who just rocked up has other ideas.

20/09/20 8:38:30

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10271Mr Dome

David Copperfield

20/09/20 8:11:59

 
Al Overy Vote score: 1618Al Overy

Peter Read

20/09/20 8:09:21

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13288Vanessa the Guesser

Somewhere in Wales..

Dai Hard.

20/09/20 8:06:10

 
more photos from the captioning gallery