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"Is that a mark on your specs?"  "Dont be silly. Its a Dave."
"Is that a mark on your specs?"  "Dont be silly. Its a Dave." photo | portfolio
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Al Overy Vote score: 1353Al Overy

"Is that a mark on your specs?"

"Don't be silly. It's a Dave."

06/09/20 20:04:15

 2
Or maybe a Nick? --Willie Johnson
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32501Tony Edwards

These pop-up books are getting more and more realistic.

06/09/20 20:45:41

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 11776Stephen Bean

Determined to catch the Borrowers who had nicked his matches and eaten half his apple, Dave resorted to the old superglue on the spectacles trick.

06/09/20 22:22:48

 1
Dave won't be making an appearance any time soon. The Borrowers had some super glue of their own. --Willie Johnson
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10998Neil Mackenzie

I haven’t read this book but I have read Little Women.

06/09/20 21:21:39

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4964Karyn Harrison

Lads and glasses

06/09/20 20:34:47

 1
I have a penchent for big lasses --Mr Dome
Eugene  Quill Eugene Quill

"Hurry up, Gulliver wants to drive to Barnard Castle!"

07/09/20 15:55:57

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 683alexandra ball

Spec savers

06/09/20 20:34:20

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22906Ian Skelding

"Do you have to do that every time I get to a naughty bit?"

06/09/20 20:25:02

 
James Lennox Vote score: 6128James Lennox

Everybody is sick to death of Gulliver, especially the other Lilliputian team assigned to bleaching his arsehole.

06/09/20 20:11:51

 
The Wolf Vote score: 8042The Wolf

Hello captioneers. I'm Mr Bookface and I'll be judging tonight's captions. Please excuse the little men standing on my moustache, they're just cleaning my glasses so I don't miss any caption jems. Now, if you're drunk, make your caption and see me smile then you're doing well. If you're drunk, make your caption and don't see me smile then please try again. If you're not drunk and don't see anything then congratulations on being responsible on a Sunday evening but come on...live a little.

06/09/20 20:06:32

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 608Charles Gilbert

because my glasses are only a little dirty of course.

07/09/20 0:11:15

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13073Vanessa the Guesser

"These glasses I ordered are far too big. I didn't read the small print."

06/09/20 20:42:07

 1
Probably because you didn't have the glasses to read the small print when you ordered. --Willie Johnson
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13073Vanessa the Guesser

There seems to be an absence of aqueous humour.

06/09/20 20:22:49

 1
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32501Tony Edwards

Vision technicians

06/09/20 20:04:39

 
Ellen Duncalf Vote score: 91Ellen Duncalf

The Lilliput branch of Extinction Rebellion deliver a harsh warning ”Only a clear vision with action will ensure Earth’s next chapter.”

07/09/20 9:39:32

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20856John Glover

"No I didn't say Clive was one of us. I said he was an 'arse wipe'."

07/09/20 1:43:10

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 608Charles Gilbert

See? This is why reading the fine print is important guys.

07/09/20 0:10:47

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10162Mr Dome

- My right lens is all smudged and smeared with stuff - did you know that?
- Yes. That's why I called in Randall and Hopkirk, degreased

06/09/20 23:40:51

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2666Scrijjy Doo

The Wash of the Sight Brigade

06/09/20 23:38:39

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9298Chris Keegan

Ant sized people cleaning glasses. That's novel.

06/09/20 21:57:03

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2666Scrijjy Doo

Stop raking a spectacle of your elf.

06/09/20 21:28:07

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

The Shining

06/09/20 21:22:02

 
Chris Halliwell Vote score: 5202Chris Halliwell

The Gig economy.

06/09/20 21:21:27

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11353Dave Bryan

Optical illusion

06/09/20 20:38:37

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2666Scrijjy Doo

Books on Scrape

06/09/20 20:38:14

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10162Mr Dome

Before they were famous - painter and decorator Warwick Davis and window cleaners Ant and Dec

06/09/20 20:37:40

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2666Scrijjy Doo

That's what you get reading dirty books.

06/09/20 20:35:18

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 6400Vivvy En

A tome with a view

06/09/20 20:24:20

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 23475Michael Winner

Fogbound.

06/09/20 20:23:38

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6882Glyn Evans

"Oi! I never requested you to be here, so I won't be paying you for cleaning my windows!"

06/09/20 20:18:58

 
Red Guy Vote score: 328Red Guy

"Are you tired there, Fred?"
"I am a little"

06/09/20 20:02:15

 
James Lennox Vote score: 6128James Lennox

Specks cleaning.

06/09/20 20:02:06

 
Al Overy Vote score: 1353Al Overy

I felt some aspects of Gulliver's life warranted closer attention, so I started a small focus group.

06/09/20 20:01:52

 
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