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The cheap seats at the opera are OK. Just make sure you duck when they turn the spotlights on.
The cheap seats at the opera are OK. Just make sure you duck when they turn the spotlights on. photo | portfolio
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James Lennox Vote score: 5735James Lennox

The cheap seats at the opera are OK. Just make sure you duck when they turn the spotlights on.

31/07/20 8:09:57

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20695John Glover

"I know I'm whispering, that nosey cow on your right is trying to listen in on our conversation."

31/07/20 12:40:44

 
alexandra ball Vote score: 551alexandra ball

This dryer isn't loud enough, I can still hear her!

31/07/20 8:52:14

 1
"What?" --Willie Johnson
Michael Winner Vote score: 23172Michael Winner

"Oh, you're having your mind erased too?"

31/07/20 8:47:20

 
Molly R Vote score: 1856Molly R

Ethel, I know you're a slow reader, but your hair is done and it's time you went home.

31/07/20 8:04:46

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10257Dave Bryan

''I'm so pleased the hairdressing salons are open again. I've really missed sitting on uncomfortable chairs, reading old magazines.''

31/07/20 8:40:00

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1620Willie Johnson

The alien tube-mouths were about to get two more victims.

31/07/20 11:12:36

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4792Karyn Harrison

Triple sec.

31/07/20 10:07:27

 
The Wolf Vote score: 7233The Wolf

2021.

"Ladies, if you want your pedicures you'll need to put your Covid helmets back on"

31/07/20 8:14:23

 
David Robb Vote score: 178David Robb

"What style would I get on full suction?"
"That would be the Sinead O'Connor."

31/07/20 18:54:11

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10257Dave Bryan

''I see Denis The Menace is in trouble again.''

31/07/20 8:17:33

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9890Mr Dome

What's the point of this they will still have grey hair

31/07/20 8:15:37

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 6824Hercules Rockefeller

Perm bank

31/07/20 8:14:42

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10257Dave Bryan

''What do you think of this 'smack a mole' idea, Mavis?''

''Not a lot. It doesn't get rid of the mole and it hurts your face.''

31/07/20 8:09:15

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2446Scrijjy Doo

Hair to the Throne

31/07/20 14:48:42

 
Al Overy Vote score: 505Al Overy

"Look girls! Page 6 - caption competition. Put something about Dave and superglue!"

31/07/20 13:21:02

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6707Glyn Evans

"It's impressive how you can read and spin those buckets on your heads at the same time..."

31/07/20 12:24:29

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10801Neil Mackenzie

You spend hours at the salon and go home, your husband is bound to notice and complement you.
He eats his dinner and says nothing. You watch tv together he says nothing. You go to bed, he says who the hell are you? Where’s my wife?

31/07/20 11:44:15

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2024Rachel P

1950's in da hood

31/07/20 11:09:33

 
David Robb Vote score: 178David Robb

Wouldn't Homer like you to try another look Marge.

31/07/20 10:27:55

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9890Mr Dome

For middle aged spinsters this is the last chance salon

31/07/20 10:17:06

 
Al Overy Vote score: 505Al Overy

"Will you be going for collar and cuffs, Betty?"

31/07/20 10:16:28

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22427Ian Skelding

"Look, Queen Victoria's going to continually wear black from when her hubby died last week."

31/07/20 9:36:03

 
Al Overy Vote score: 505Al Overy

Time for a bit of dry humour.

31/07/20 8:33:13

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 12541Vanessa the Guesser

"I do hope Dave gets something for the weekend. I'm up for a good shag."

31/07/20 8:33:09

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 10257Dave Bryan

''I don't need a hairdryer. I'm married to Alex Ferguson.''

31/07/20 8:21:27

 
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