creative clever

The cheap seats at the opera are OK. Just make sure you duck when they turn the spotlights on.

31/07/20 8:09:57

"I know I'm whispering, that nosey cow on your right is trying to listen in on our conversation."

31/07/20 12:40:44

This dryer isn't loud enough, I can still hear her!

31/07/20 8:52:14

"Oh, you're having your mind erased too?"

31/07/20 8:47:20

Ethel, I know you're a slow reader, but your hair is done and it's time you went home.

31/07/20 8:04:46

''I'm so pleased the hairdressing salons are open again. I've really missed sitting on uncomfortable chairs, reading old magazines.''

31/07/20 8:40:00

The alien tube-mouths were about to get two more victims.

31/07/20 11:12:36

Triple sec.

31/07/20 10:07:27

2021.

"Ladies, if you want your pedicures you'll need to put your Covid helmets back on"

31/07/20 8:14:23

"What style would I get on full suction?"
"That would be the Sinead O'Connor."

31/07/20 18:54:11

''I see Denis The Menace is in trouble again.''

31/07/20 8:17:33

What's the point of this they will still have grey hair

31/07/20 8:15:37

Perm bank

31/07/20 8:14:42

''What do you think of this 'smack a mole' idea, Mavis?''

''Not a lot. It doesn't get rid of the mole and it hurts your face.''

31/07/20 8:09:15

Hair to the Throne

31/07/20 14:48:42

"Look girls! Page 6 - caption competition. Put something about Dave and superglue!"

31/07/20 13:21:02

"It's impressive how you can read and spin those buckets on your heads at the same time..."

31/07/20 12:24:29

You spend hours at the salon and go home, your husband is bound to notice and complement you.
He eats his dinner and says nothing. You watch tv together he says nothing. You go to bed, he says who the hell are you? Where’s my wife?

31/07/20 11:44:15

1950's in da hood

31/07/20 11:09:33

Wouldn't Homer like you to try another look Marge.

31/07/20 10:27:55

For middle aged spinsters this is the last chance salon

31/07/20 10:17:06

"Will you be going for collar and cuffs, Betty?"

31/07/20 10:16:28

"Look, Queen Victoria's going to continually wear black from when her hubby died last week."

31/07/20 9:36:03

Time for a bit of dry humour.

31/07/20 8:33:13

"I do hope Dave gets something for the weekend. I'm up for a good shag."

31/07/20 8:33:09

''I don't need a hairdryer. I'm married to Alex Ferguson.''

31/07/20 8:21:27