lol

''After three days of suffering in excruciating agony, the cat eventually died.''

''That was wonderful. I love a happy ending.''

22/05/20 8:37:20

''Julian and George sat down to eat their ice creams....''

''Skip that. Move on to the bit where Timmy finds the buried treasure.''

22/05/20 8:14:57

"How come your dog can read?"
"It's a mystery."

22/05/20 8:09:58

"...and they all lived happily ever after. Right, brush your teeth and off to bed, Sharon."

22/05/20 8:13:15

Reading Fifty Shades Of Grey with talking my dog -
========================================
"As Christian Grey entered the room, the first thing Anastasia thought of was.."

-"Sausages."


"Why Miss Steele, would you like to meet my work colleagues? They would like you to appraise their..."

-"Sausages."

"That night, after the party, Christian and his friends from work, gathered round Anastasia, in her bedroom. She had never seen so many."

-"Sausages."

22/05/20 9:01:51

''When you asked me if I wanted some meatloaf, I didn't realise you meant the boring bastard's autobiography.''

22/05/20 8:28:29

"Hee Hee. I can't wait to see her face. I chewed out the last page"

22/05/20 8:08:07

Yorkshire tales

22/05/20 10:39:51

Dog Breader.

22/05/20 8:11:04

"Woof, woof woof woof, woof woof. Woof? Woof woof woof, woof woof!"

22/05/20 8:07:32

"I much preferred See Spot Run."

22/05/20 12:02:16

I know I can talk but as I keep telling you I can't read as I'm dogslexic

22/05/20 11:34:11

"That's a GOOD QUESTION. Doesn't say in here. WAIT A MINUTE: ...Did you just TALK?"

22/05/20 11:28:01

So do you think Schrödinger's cat would be alive or dead?
I think an experiment with one cat is not a large enough study, I think every cat should be stuck in a box.

22/05/20 10:20:02

Bored terrier

22/05/20 9:41:49

Bookwormed

22/05/20 9:19:17

Not Tintin again? that fuc****g Snowy gets on my tits.

22/05/20 8:24:00

He comes from a litterary family.

22/05/20 8:20:27

Mutt Ado About Nothing.....again

22/05/20 8:14:50

Fido almost forgot to dog ear his place in the book before having lunch.

22/05/20 8:12:32

A novel approach to dog walking

22/05/20 8:09:18

Oh, not Mills and Boon again, woman - I want Proust!

22/05/20 8:04:37

I have literally no idea whats going on here.

24/05/20 17:32:01

"I thought we were having a relaxing day in Reading"

22/05/20 10:17:00

"God I'll be glad when the pubs are back open."

22/05/20 9:06:24

I wonder if Mr Grey does it doggy style?

22/05/20 8:52:48

His paperback is worse than his bite.

22/05/20 8:32:45

''Is this Pride and Prejudice?''

''No, Mansfield Bark.''

22/05/20 8:20:12