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"Right, thats curry sauce, mango chutney, basmati rice, onion bhaji, poppadoms and a Nan."
"Right, thats curry sauce, mango chutney, basmati rice, onion bhaji, poppadoms and a Nan." photo | portfolio
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Ian Skelding Vote score: 24090Ian Skelding

"Right, that's curry sauce, mango chutney, basmati rice, onion bhaji, poppadoms and a Nan."

15/03/20 12:57:09

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 7669Hercules Rockefeller

Cart Blanche

15/03/20 12:02:06

 
  Smuldo Vote score: 11739 Smuldo

*Ding Dong*... "Puddle of piss in aisle three..."

15/03/20 17:11:00

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 5458Karyn Harrison

"Looks like they're out of loo rolls Mum, but never mind, if the worst comes to the worst we can use my collection of 'Men in Belted Sweaters' magazines."

15/03/20 16:46:49

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 906Charles Gilbert

Successfully smuggling cucumbers since 1953.

15/03/20 16:06:31

 
The Wolf Vote score: 10943The Wolf

"Excuse me madam, I know everyone is panicking at the moment but the old lady is not for sale. Put her back please"

15/03/20 12:02:29

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14822Stephen Bean

"She's suffering from C aisle dementia."

15/03/20 12:12:55

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14320Vanessa the Guesser

Always take an old bag shopping.

15/03/20 12:00:41

 1
One that's recyclable. --Scrijjy Doo
alexandra ball Vote score: 1017alexandra ball

These personal shoppers really take the job seriously

15/03/20 19:59:38

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2485Mark Wilson

Not my fault love you bought me the fitbit and it's telling me I've done my walking for one day

15/03/20 19:35:48

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 5038Lucky Elperro

Okay, so that's the frozen peas, frozen carrots, frozen, frozen cauliflower florets and frozen chips. Are your haemorrhoids feeling better or do you want to go for the frozen turkeys?

15/03/20 18:01:24

 
stone face Vote score: 8854stone face

"And remember dear, When you go the fruit aisle don't forget to get me a nana."

15/03/20 13:13:53

 
GeeDee Vote score: 2872GeeDee

Pushing Miss Daisy

15/03/20 12:57:50

 
Paul Reeve Vote score: 5825Paul Reeve

“You can get out and walk now mum, but one more tantrum and your straight back in there.”

15/03/20 12:08:08

 
The Wolf Vote score: 10943The Wolf

"I was in Asda today and I went to the toilets and found this old lady 'mid wipe'. Well, it was the only piece of bog roll left in the entire place so I thought, f*ck it, I'll take it"

15/03/20 12:01:58

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 5038Lucky Elperro

Wayne Rooney's housekeeper spotted in Asda.

15/03/20 17:57:19

 
John  Glover Vote score: 21320John Glover

"Stuff a few of the dearer things up my dress, when we get to the checkout tell them you're pushing me in the trolley because I suddenly became unwell and I'm pregnant."

15/03/20 13:22:52

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 24090Ian Skelding

The only things that this Supermarket had ran out of was 'Caution, slippery surface' signs."

15/03/20 13:02:45

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 5458Karyn Harrison

"You've got me all this Coke and stuff and they've run out of Tena Lady?"

15/03/20 12:56:58

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 33463Tony Edwards

Gran Theft Auto

15/03/20 12:49:19

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 14320Vanessa the Guesser

"Ooh my pen ran out. I need SOAP not OAP."

15/03/20 12:34:43

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14822Stephen Bean

"We'll save the money you put aside for Dignitas Mum, if you just stay here and meet a few people. Don't forget to shake their hands."

15/03/20 12:06:48

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14822Stephen Bean

"My daughter's really aged since she caught the coronanvirus."

15/03/20 12:01:19

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 7565Glyn Evans

The trap is set. Now to wait for the paedophile's approach...

15/03/20 12:00:15

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 2364Willie Johnson

Hey that meat's supposed to be fresh. She looks too tough and past the sell-by date.

17/03/20 8:18:43

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5292Kenny Ireland

Aisle of Silly.

15/03/20 19:35:43

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 2485Mark Wilson

Mom and Pops

15/03/20 19:30:00

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

“Leaving Mum at home would have been a missed steak for her”

15/03/20 16:43:40

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15602Dan Nicholls

Stock piles?

15/03/20 16:35:24

 
Madeline Charlton Vote score: 175Madeline Charlton

Prankster Granny

15/03/20 16:23:28

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 906Charles Gilbert

"How much for a Gram?"

15/03/20 16:05:36

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 11133Mr Dome

Supermarket Sleep

15/03/20 15:50:48

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3271Scrijjy Doo

She's a little tough, but should be suitable for making soup stock.

15/03/20 15:45:53

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 5292Kenny Ireland

"Why do I always end up with the wobbly ones?"

15/03/20 14:43:39

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 7183Vivvy En

Dolly's trolley

15/03/20 14:24:38

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13257Dave Bryan

Coronavirus Breaking News: As hospitals run out of beds, patients are bringing their own trolleys to A & E.

15/03/20 14:03:49

 
Mark England Vote score: 17750Mark England

"That's it. I've had enough of you playing up. When we get home you're going straight to your cot"

15/03/20 13:24:33

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 5458Karyn Harrison

Coca-Cola ✓
7 Up ✓
Tango ✓
Now, where's the Wind Eze?

15/03/20 13:17:49

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3271Scrijjy Doo

Reduced price. Slightly irregular.

15/03/20 13:08:32

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 3271Scrijjy Doo

On sale. Past expiration date.

15/03/20 13:07:56

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

“The kids always treat me like a baby, yesterday I woke up in a cot!”

15/03/20 13:06:00

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11530Neil Mackenzie

No Mum you can’t have a chocolate bar. You won’t eat your Dinner.

15/03/20 12:50:22

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 11133Mr Dome

Just look at this wizened old pear

15/03/20 12:41:20

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19552Troompa Loompa

Bedpanic buying

15/03/20 12:40:26

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 19552Troompa Loompa

Gericartric

15/03/20 12:37:01

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 33463Tony Edwards

Unexpected item in the bagging area.

15/03/20 12:25:20

 
Paul Reeve Vote score: 5825Paul Reeve

“I would wrap you up in cotton wool if I could mum, but there’s none left on the shelves.”

15/03/20 12:06:52

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 13257Dave Bryan

Nanic buying

15/03/20 12:00:54

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11530Neil Mackenzie

She remembered looking down at two little rose buds but now they were full bloom, the next stage would be to wilt and drop off.

15/03/20 12:00:10

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 14822Stephen Bean

"You'd get trollyed too, if you got told to self-isolate for 3 months."

15/03/20 12:00:06

 
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