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I told her not to insult my horse.
I told her not to insult my horse. photo | portfolio
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James Lennox Vote score: 6114James Lennox

I told her not to insult my horse.

16/05/20 8:03:42

 
James Lennox Vote score: 6114James Lennox

"Hi social media followers. So I got really drunk last night and when I woke up somebody had written "unt" down my chest?"

16/05/20 8:19:20

 2
One of the pitfalls of being a member of the Cambridge University Netball Team. --Chris Halliwell
Mark Wilson Vote score: 1971Mark Wilson

See it works, nobody's looking at that spot on my cheek anymore

16/05/20 11:50:03

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 11704Stephen Bean

Halo Katy

16/05/20 8:47:20

 1
The Name's....PANDORA COVID !! --Woofer 6
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11249Dave Bryan

''The broken ring suggests that she is a member of a secret, weird cult. They call themselves 'The Teenagers'.''

16/05/20 8:22:54

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11249Dave Bryan

''Jane loves sci fi movies. Sometimes I think she's got flying saucers on the brain.''

16/05/20 8:06:14

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 1971Mark Wilson

Sod the lockdown hun I think your new look is amazing too. Go and socialise

16/05/20 11:48:02

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13031Vanessa the Guesser

"Do you need any help madam?"
"No, I'm just browsing."

16/05/20 8:55:13

 
Molly R Vote score: 2043Molly R

I've finally got a handle on her.

16/05/20 8:06:18

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5966Tosser Wivlov

Ok you win, here's £40, go and get yourself a damn star tattoo on your ankle.

16/05/20 19:35:25

 
Dev B Vote score: 645Dev B

Look carefully and you will find Dick

16/05/20 14:28:56

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10130Mr Dome

- Hey, what's your name?
- Ariel

16/05/20 10:05:42

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 15283Dan Nicholls

Get the dum dum look

16/05/20 9:45:26

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1791Willie Johnson

Pull handle to break glass-y eyed stare.

16/05/20 8:56:55

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 11704Stephen Bean

Loopy Lou

16/05/20 8:35:52

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11249Dave Bryan

Facehook

16/05/20 8:35:23

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 11249Dave Bryan

Simone Templar

16/05/20 8:32:40

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5910C CaMel

"I'd hoped the staples from the facelift would be more discreet."

16/05/20 8:30:15

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 6983Hercules Rockefeller

"Maybe she's born with it. Maybe, it's chocolate sauce?"

16/05/20 8:04:30

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 1698Karen Oakenfull

Yet another teenager branded as a weirdo.

17/05/20 8:44:09

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 1698Karen Oakenfull

I don’t know why but I suddenly fancy opening a tin of corned beef.

17/05/20 5:21:47

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10987Neil Mackenzie

Her makeup is simply oval.

16/05/20 20:40:39

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10987Neil Mackenzie

What the Pluck!

16/05/20 19:41:30

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10987Neil Mackenzie

Not so much the missing link, more the broken link.

16/05/20 19:37:00

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10987Neil Mackenzie

She’d wanted to kiss and make up, but her boyfriend just wanted to make her look stupid.

16/05/20 18:48:52

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 4648Lucky Elperro

♫ Hit me with your liquorice stick, hit me, hit me ♫

16/05/20 17:54:35

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20842John Glover

"Trust me darlin', I've been playing with me little brothers rubber sticker arrows all lockdown. Move over to the wall and just stand very still."

16/05/20 15:53:52

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 409Gavin Smithers

It means lockdown makes her feel like she's a sardine

16/05/20 14:46:08

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20842John Glover

The missing link.

16/05/20 12:57:31

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 1971Mark Wilson

"Dad I'm sorry. Can you get the marker and let me back into the family circle of trust"

16/05/20 11:58:36

 
Dev B Vote score: 645Dev B

Third eye blind

16/05/20 11:05:46

 1
Must be Cy Clops that did it. --Woofer 6
stone face Vote score: 8042stone face

"How did you get on at the Intellectual Make-Up awards?"

"I found it all a bit high brow, to be honest."

16/05/20 11:04:02

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2297Rachel P

Don’t let dogs lick your face

16/05/20 10:05:07

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9273Chris Keegan

Tina seems to handle herself well.

16/05/20 9:42:39

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 4454Stu Dent

This is what happens when you make you own home brow.

16/05/20 9:33:13

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 22884Ian Skelding

"I think the bullseye target sign would be better red Miss Eilish."

16/05/20 9:27:05

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32484Tony Edwards

Alice Band

16/05/20 8:59:20

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10130Mr Dome

Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's melanoma

16/05/20 8:37:46

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 11704Stephen Bean

"If I find the little shit that did this to me..."

16/05/20 8:24:13

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 6395Vivvy En

Like mine for this photo, her thinking cap is empty

16/05/20 8:19:09

 2
Maybe five captioneers wanted to post 8:06:18's caption. --Willie Johnson
Chris Halliwell Vote score: 5194Chris Halliwell

Trouble Browing?

16/05/20 8:04:03

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6867Glyn Evans

"Live Long and Sport a Vulcan Monobrow"

16/05/20 8:00:17

 
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