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Dave Bryan Vote score: 26756Dave Bryan

Birdwatching For Beginners

28/03/20 8:42:18

That bird is not a beginner. He's been around the block a few times. --Willie Johnson
Stu Dent Vote score: 5657Stu Dent

A you sure there is no toilet roll left.

28/03/20 8:25:16

I've heard in Europe they use birdies instead. --Scrijjy Doo
Vivvy En Vote score: 11725Vivvy En

"Dave, when I said 'Bring a chick to the party'..."

28/03/20 8:23:23

Stephen Bean Vote score: 31206Stephen Bean

"Oh no, look's like I've caught thrush again."

28/03/20 8:50:42

Crunchy Chords Vote score: 7369Crunchy Chords
Birdwatching For Beginners

29/03/20 7:22:44

Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 14382Neil Mackenzie

I'm going to need more of these to make a Summer.

28/03/20 8:41:59

Michael Winner Vote score: 25610Michael Winner

"Look, it's one of those Messenger sparrows- what does it say? 'Stay indoors you f*cking moron'."

28/03/20 8:21:36

It says 'tweet'? --Willie Johnson
Michael Winner Vote score: 25610Michael Winner

"Dave, it's me- I'm you, from the future."

28/03/20 8:16:03

Ian Skelding Vote score: 31139Ian Skelding

"Doc?"

28/03/20 9:19:48

Back to the Future reference? --Willie Johnson
Tony Edwards Vote score: 37323Tony Edwards

Has no-one told him that we are on flockdown?

28/03/20 8:49:35

Michael Winner Vote score: 25610Michael Winner

"Just sign for it mate, you're not supposed to handle Amazon delivery personnel."

28/03/20 8:23:54

Dave Bryan Vote score: 26756Dave Bryan

More birds grounded as flight ban is introduced.

28/03/20 8:20:08

Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 19874Vanessa the Guesser

Police searched the suspect's nest and found large stashes of toilet paper, eggs and bleach.

28/03/20 8:07:13

Stephen Bean Vote score: 31206Stephen Bean

"Let me go please, I'm not the sort of bird that enjoys being fisted."

28/03/20 8:00:06

Dan Nicholls Vote score: 18171Dan Nicholls

...and that's why we named him after Patrick Moore.

28/03/20 8:42:31

The Skylark At Night --Dave Bryan
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