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Blue cross sale on til Easter, when prices will rise again.
Blue cross sale on til Easter, when prices will rise again. photo | portfolio
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Dan Nicholls Vote score: 14552Dan Nicholls

Blue cross sale on 'til Easter, when prices will rise again.

22/02/20 8:52:28

 2
* Manger's special --Mr Dome
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10555Neil Mackenzie

Saviour legs and sit down.

22/02/20 8:13:48

 2
Willie - 'Four' he’s a jolly good fellow --Stephen Bean
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

Well, nobody can say that Texas State executioners don't have a sense of humour.

22/02/20 8:04:39

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5701C CaMel

”We have one chair in stock, but there’s a second coming in the warehouse.”

22/02/20 8:58:05

 1
Tony Edwards Vote score: 31443Tony Edwards

The antique shop displays the item that brings in the largest prophet.

22/02/20 9:35:50

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5701C CaMel

Mass produced.

22/02/20 18:03:46

 
Dot Old Vote score: 896Dot Old

"Do you have another 12? I'm hosting a big supper tonight."

22/02/20 8:33:02

 
The Wolf Vote score: 6978The Wolf

"...and here at 'The St Paul and St Francis International Evangelical Spiritual Baptist Faith Archdiocese of Bognor Regis', we believe that Jesus came back as a chair"

22/02/20 9:28:22

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9036Dave Bryan

''Hello there, Mary. Sit on this.''

22/02/20 8:48:26

 1
He is risen. --Willie Johnson
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10555Neil Mackenzie

I see it’s got slight damage, there are nail holes in the hands and feet.

22/02/20 8:11:34

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9243Stephen Bean

King of the Pews

22/02/20 8:00:05

 
The Wolf Vote score: 6978The Wolf

Resting piece

22/02/20 9:24:56

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 6581Hercules Rockefeller

Jesus tended to be a bit narcissistic about his carpentry skills.

22/02/20 8:17:08

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6512Glyn Evans

"After forty days and nights of fasting, what do you expect me to look like?!"

22/02/20 8:03:25

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 11509Vanessa the Guesser

In the lap of the Gods.

22/02/20 8:00:41

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

"Jew want to sit down?"

22/02/20 8:00:10

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 18041Troompa Loompa

A Christian splinter group.

22/02/20 9:46:41

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9036Dave Bryan

The Lord's Chair

22/02/20 8:22:50

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

In many ways, Jesus was a self-made man.

22/02/20 8:02:17

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9243Stephen Bean

Joseph put down his tools, went to bed and dreamt he had a real boy.

22/02/20 8:01:51

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9243Stephen Bean

King of the Yews

22/02/20 8:00:21

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5701C CaMel

They turned a prophet last year.

22/02/20 23:11:25

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9243Stephen Bean

Joseph's woodwork keeps getting messiah and messiah.

22/02/20 8:13:36

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6512Glyn Evans

"The biggest problem with the resurrection was that that f**king boulder didn't quite roll away"

22/02/20 8:07:46

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 11509Vanessa the Guesser

I love the décor at the Parish Hilton.

22/02/20 8:05:49

 
stone face Vote score: 7464stone face

My wife took the Jesus chair back to the man in the shop, for a refund, but he wouldn't redeem her.

22/02/20 8:04:46

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 487Charles Gilbert

"No way!"

"Yahweh."

22/02/20 18:03:46

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 18041Troompa Loompa

"Jesus, don't you think this making everything in your own image obsession has gone a bit too far?"

22/02/20 10:16:23

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 14552Dan Nicholls

"I appreciate the subject matter, all I'm asking is for a model with a cupped hand so the son of God can hold my beer".

22/02/20 8:50:53

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 14552Dan Nicholls

No sir, it doesn't come with drainage, we didn't want to drill into the seat because we didn't think it apt to try and make it holier.

22/02/20 8:37:47

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 5626Vivvy En

If only she could turn back time - Chair's gone too far with the plastic surgery

22/02/20 8:14:27

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

"Do you have this in 'Satan'?"

22/02/20 8:11:10

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10555Neil Mackenzie

Antique Roadshow:- Now it’s signed JC but I’m not familiar with this maker.

22/02/20 8:10:10

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5701C CaMel

'I dread to think what the sofa weighs.'
"He ain't heavy, he's my Buddha."

22/02/20 23:10:20

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2099Scrijjy Doo

Love Seat

22/02/20 22:54:12

 
James Lennox Vote score: 5340James Lennox

"Hi, welcome to heaven. We have chairs, and board games ... oh, and there's a table-tennis table over there in the corner. So, yeah, enjoy your stay."

22/02/20 18:49:55

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 487Charles Gilbert

Never tell a Genie that you wish to be Chairman.

22/02/20 18:13:07

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 487Charles Gilbert

Sit on my lap and tell me what you want for Christmas.

22/02/20 18:11:09

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 487Charles Gilbert

Ooh, the new Stigmatic 3000.

22/02/20 18:10:17

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 487Charles Gilbert

The Iran Throne.

22/02/20 18:08:46

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 487Charles Gilbert

It's a Raisey Boy.

22/02/20 18:08:18

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 487Charles Gilbert

"The one who conquers, I will grant him to sit with me on my throne, as I also conquered and sat down with my Father on his throne."

22/02/20 18:06:32

 
Charles Gilbert Vote score: 487Charles Gilbert

New stock arriving at Bed Bethlehem and Beyond.

22/02/20 18:01:26

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20326John Glover

"I asked for six chairs and two carvers.For a start, Jesus wasn't a carver, he was a carpenter."

22/02/20 13:45:08

 
Madeline Charlton Vote score: 175Madeline Charlton

And He sits at God's right hand

22/02/20 10:38:41

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2099Scrijjy Doo

"Sit at my right hand until I make your enemies your footstool."

22/02/20 10:11:00

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2099Scrijjy Doo

"Be of good chair. I have overcome the world."

22/02/20 10:02:40

 
Troompa Loompa Vote score: 18041Troompa Loompa

"That was quick thinking Jesus. You can get up now, Judas Iscariot has gone."

22/02/20 9:57:43

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 31443Tony Edwards

A chip off the old block.

22/02/20 9:51:10

 
stone face Vote score: 7464stone face

"Why has this chair, been given the chair of the month sticker?"

"Because it's the chosen one."

22/02/20 9:31:48

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1366Willie Johnson

"Gotta go. If I don't get home in time the wife is going to crucify me."

"Oops, sorry Jesus, didn't mean to bring up any bad memories."

22/02/20 9:18:53

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1366Willie Johnson

If he has four legs, are those his forelegs?

22/02/20 9:06:12

 
James Lennox Vote score: 5340James Lennox

He sits next to a higher authority.

22/02/20 9:05:37

 
Dev B Vote score: 604Dev B

The Chairman of Mankind Inc.

22/02/20 8:44:40

 
GeeDee Vote score: 2851GeeDee

As Chairman of the Board I would like to propose...Cushions!

22/02/20 8:36:39

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9419Mr Dome

The God Squat

22/02/20 8:16:55

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 11509Vanessa the Guesser

Chapel of Rest.

22/02/20 8:07:43

 
Dot Old Vote score: 896Dot Old

The seat of the Lord Speaker

22/02/20 8:06:47

 
James Lennox Vote score: 5340James Lennox

Jesus Chairst

22/02/20 8:06:45

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9036Dave Bryan

Soon after starting his carpentry business, Jesus realised the importance of branding.

22/02/20 8:05:41

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

“This week on ‘Literal Bible Carpentry’, Psalm 132:7: “Let us worship at his footstool.”

22/02/20 8:02:55

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9036Dave Bryan

Sat Stevens

22/02/20 8:02:09

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9036Dave Bryan

''It looks like a cheap reproduction to me. Are you sure it's kosher?''

22/02/20 8:00:44

 
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