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"Darling, how many times have I told you not to put your dolls clothes on the tortoise?"
"Darling, how many times have I told you not to put your dolls clothes on the tortoise?" photo | portfolio
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Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4426Karyn Harrison

"Darling, how many times have I told you not to put your dolls' clothes on the tortoise?"

23/02/20 12:13:48

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9092Dave Bryan

''Have you seen the bath towel, gran?''

23/02/20 12:06:29

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8479Chris Keegan

Madonna suddenly runs out of her anti aging cream

23/02/20 12:25:56

 1
♫ Like a sturgeon … ♫ --Scrijjy Doo
Greg Curtis Vote score: 6099Greg Curtis

"After 70 years of striving to be model, Gladys signs a contract with Caption.me."

23/02/20 12:31:43

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

"Smoking and drinking never did me any harm", says Suzy age 30.

23/02/20 12:00:10

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9339Stephen Bean

WARNING: The following caption may induce nausea…

"I've taken out my false teeth for you. Now just lie back, close your eyes and enjoy the best blow job you've ever had. You'll soon forget my age."

23/02/20 12:02:16

 1
Or treasured memories...  --Mr Dome
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 4462Lucky Elperro

Yes, I work in the Toblerone factory, but I know nothing about stolen goods, really.

23/02/20 12:16:08

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4426Karyn Harrison

Sophia Loren's still got it!

23/02/20 12:15:17

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9339Stephen Bean

Benjamin Button's sister enjoys her first day at school.

23/02/20 12:50:27

 
stone face Vote score: 7494stone face

She's got a face like a knot on a balloon..

23/02/20 12:39:50

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 6586Hercules Rockefeller

The Mother Teresa wax figure was deplorable at best.

23/02/20 12:23:26

 
Molly R Vote score: 1681Molly R

"I wear my teeth round my neck so that I don't lose them when washing my hair."

23/02/20 12:03:27

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 21961Ian Skelding

"Welcome home Cherie Blair."

23/02/20 12:01:10

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8479Chris Keegan

When it came to internet dating Joyce had a cunning plan. This profile photo was actually taken years ago.

23/02/20 12:48:40

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1384Willie Johnson

Yes, I do work in the Toblerone factory. I haven't been able to find my teeth since my last shift.

Nod to 12:16:08 and to 12:03:27 which I had not seen before writing this.

23/02/20 12:31:11

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 21961Ian Skelding

Ivana manages to get a visa to work in Derby thanks to Wayne Rooney.

23/02/20 12:29:44

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9339Stephen Bean

"They don't call me 'Old Mother Rub-hard' for nothing."

23/02/20 12:15:31

 
The Wolf Vote score: 6985The Wolf

"Is this a joke? You're the call girl? Oh f*ck it, go on then, I've paid for it now..."

23/02/20 12:06:39

 
The Wolf Vote score: 6985The Wolf

As you reach your older years, your face can become susceptible to prolonged cases of severe muscle rigidity. This can be seen here as Doris is given some terribly sad news.

23/02/20 12:03:02

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9092Dave Bryan

New gaptioneer joins site.

23/02/20 12:01:35

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9339Stephen Bean

"How did you recognise me? My profile pic is seventy years old."

23/02/20 12:00:14

 
The Caption Guy The Caption Guy

Maury Povitch, I love you long time, and "YOU", ARE THE FATHER!"

03/03/20 18:11:50

 
larry G. Vote score: 1471larry G.

“ I never flossed- and how did that workout?”

26/02/20 2:24:47

 
Arogya reddy Arogya reddy

Life is oldful

24/02/20 19:20:44

 
The Caption Guy The Caption Guy


"I joined date.com and she popped up on my profile match!"

24/02/20 19:20:19

 
Generic RedHead Vote score: 681Generic RedHead

"Celebs before they were famous, this week featuring Katie Hopkins"

24/02/20 9:54:15

 
C CaMel Vote score: 5705C CaMel

"I have learned one thing with absolute certainty, that was no fart."

24/02/20 6:08:26

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10565Neil Mackenzie

When she was asked how she lost her teeth?
I was walking past Deontay Wilder’s corner when suddenly his Trainer grabbed me and threw me in the ring.

23/02/20 19:54:48

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

I love this new instragran filter.

23/02/20 19:37:40

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 5691Vivvy En

"Hello, I'm Madza... Madza Hatta."

23/02/20 16:32:30

 
Madeline Charlton Vote score: 175Madeline Charlton

Desperate Gran gummy gram.

23/02/20 16:05:36

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2118Scrijjy Doo

It's hard to climax with photos like these.
I didn't say impossible.

23/02/20 14:50:17

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9437Mr Dome

It's rag week

23/02/20 14:46:12

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2118Scrijjy Doo

It's so important to have a positive attitude on the way to the glue factory.

23/02/20 14:46:09

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9437Mr Dome

Jackie Gran

23/02/20 13:41:42

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20363John Glover

"Oh, looks like gran is constipated again."

23/02/20 13:28:10

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2118Scrijjy Doo

Tampons: You're doing it wrong.

23/02/20 13:27:03

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4426Karyn Harrison

"I found her on silversingles.com. She's 75 like me. Isn't she a smasher?"
"Grandad, I think she might be lying about her Ag."

23/02/20 13:12:49

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9437Mr Dome

- What do you call an old woman with no eyes?
- No idea

(Nod to bad dad jokes)

23/02/20 13:02:25

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 31478Tony Edwards

The face that launched a thousand shits.

23/02/20 13:01:14

 
stone face Vote score: 7494stone face

What a turtley good looking woman.

23/02/20 12:39:06

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 1397Karen Oakenfull

Holy sheet!

23/02/20 12:28:54

 
Karen Oakenfull Vote score: 1397Karen Oakenfull

Our Monika

23/02/20 12:24:33

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 11552Vanessa the Guesser

She's suffering from crony virus.

23/02/20 12:12:33

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

"When folk call me names, I just gurn the other cheek"

23/02/20 12:08:20

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9092Dave Bryan

''I met her on tinker.''

23/02/20 12:03:01

 
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