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"Damn, the pens run out of ink, fetch me the squid!"
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Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

"Damn, the pen's run out of ink, fetch me the squid!"

30/12/19 20:00:09

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2095Scrijjy Doo

Authoropod

30/12/19 22:35:53

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 3201Crunchy Chords
"Damn, the pens run out of ink, fetch me the squid!"

30/12/19 20:11:53

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 11496Vanessa the Guesser

"Dear John, long time no sea..."

30/12/19 20:01:48

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 3743Stu Dent

Harold Pincer

30/12/19 20:00:18

 
stone face Vote score: 7443stone face

I like Simon the Scorpion's stories. They always have a sting in the tale.

30/12/19 20:20:33

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 3201Crunchy Chords
"Damn, the pens run out of ink, fetch me the squid!"

30/12/19 20:03:26

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9224Stephen Bean

Dear Crocodile and Egret,

You will never find me and I am now famous thanks to a caption site. If you continue to hunt the rest of my family you will be pun-ished.

Dave the Crayfish

30/12/19 21:29:41

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 6574Hercules Rockefeller

"Fine, I'll recreate the treasure map for ye, but know that I do so under protest."

30/12/19 20:06:07

 
Rachel P Vote score: 1468Rachel P

Clawlligraphy

30/12/19 20:00:26

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 4637Kenny Ireland

A gripping account.

31/12/19 9:07:40

 
Rachel P Vote score: 1468Rachel P

Sign on the potted line

30/12/19 20:19:06

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 944Sam Cass

They might not feel pain but they like to inflict it by writing a lengthy last will and testament.

30/12/19 20:11:43

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 944Sam Cass

Dear Santa,

So I did the whole sit in your lap and tell you my wishes thing. It's now December 30th and I can't help but noticing that I'm still stuck in this crabby job!

I remain,

Crushed Adrian.

30/12/19 20:02:17

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

"One morning, when Franz Kafka woke from troubled dreams, he found himself transformed in his bed into a horrible human."

30/12/19 21:04:16

 
The Wolf Vote score: 6973The Wolf

"Hi Guys, ready to order?"

"Yes, we would like two baby cocktails for a starter, followed by a boiled human to share. That fat one in the tank looks nice, oh, and chips"

30/12/19 20:39:31

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8412Chris Keegan

You absolutely have to credit wildlife for their survival, every time this sea creature is turned upside down he self writes himself.

30/12/19 20:13:02

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

Before his death, Reggie Crayfish decided to write his autobiography.

30/12/19 20:02:45

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4394Karyn Harrison

Lobster jot

30/12/19 20:00:56

 
Molly R Vote score: 1664Molly R

"...and I wish to donate my body to gastronomy."

30/12/19 20:00:18

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

"Now then, for the get out claws..."

30/12/19 20:00:04

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

"Goodbye, cruel restaurant."

31/12/19 9:29:25

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

A rare photograph of the US government advisor Stephen Miller.

30/12/19 21:06:13

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 21930Ian Skelding

Lobster Thermidraw

30/12/19 20:49:54

 
stone face Vote score: 7443stone face

"Dear Social Security,
since you moved me on to Universal Credit, I've had to take in a lodger, and now am really feeling the pinch."
Said Peter the pen.

30/12/19 20:30:30

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 944Sam Cass

An introvert, he found poetry was helping him to come out of his shell.

30/12/19 20:14:32

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 944Sam Cass

"Lobsters can't write!" they said.
But he was never one to shrimp away from a challenge.

30/12/19 20:08:14

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8412Chris Keegan

Good grief! That's a bic crab!

30/12/19 20:05:55

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8412Chris Keegan

Dear Santa Claws...

30/12/19 20:00:07

 
sarah solway Vote score: 103sarah solway

Harold Pincer Book Signing 1pm Today

31/12/19 17:04:37

 1
Madeline Charlton Vote score: 175Madeline Charlton

Demonstrating a good pincer grip...

31/12/19 16:08:44

 
mike robb Vote score: 573mike robb

Peter Parker.

31/12/19 11:09:27

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10552Neil Mackenzie

Claudia Sheaffer.

31/12/19 7:10:55

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 387Gavin Smithers

Sadly, the late Ray Wilkins never got very far with his memoirs.

30/12/19 23:16:22

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 387Gavin Smithers

"Actually, I was hoping for the details of a black cab firm".

30/12/19 23:14:09

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2095Scrijjy Doo

Read Lobster

30/12/19 22:25:26

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9413Mr Dome

Shelly's vacation in the human world was nothing to write home about

30/12/19 21:27:53

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9224Stephen Bean

"Careful, don't get too close. He's got a nasty nib!"

30/12/19 21:09:30

 
The Wolf Vote score: 6973The Wolf

Catalogue number. 652/7663. Quantity x 1. (1 x Lobster steamer)

I love Argos, thought Larry the cannibal.

30/12/19 20:57:47

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20324John Glover

"So he's signing then?"
"Yes, bought the property for a 'Snip'."

30/12/19 20:46:39

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 5608Vivvy En

It pen and inks

30/12/19 20:37:37

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 31426Tony Edwards

"The word is your lobster."

30/12/19 20:24:47

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9003Dave Bryan

According to the latest book sales figures, 'Crayfish Tales' is the new bestsheller.

30/12/19 20:20:28

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

Crayfish: Personally, I prefer using crayons.

30/12/19 20:16:54

 
Jack Joyce Vote score: 347Jack Joyce

Put down the pen, your numbers up!

30/12/19 20:00:12

 
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