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"They said the one positive to come out of Julias accident, where her arms were left permanently fixed above her head, is that it would cure her drinking problem."
"They said the one positive to come out of Julias accident, where her arms were left permanently fixed above her head, is that it would cure her drinking problem." photo | portfolio
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stone face Vote score: 5982stone face

"They said the one positive to come out of Julia's accident, where her arms were left permanently fixed above her head, is that it would cure her drinking problem."

04/12/19 18:40:21

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 21035Ian Skelding

"You'll need to hold your breaths Mummy."
"I haven't got any sweetie."

04/12/19 13:55:39

 1
I tried to think of one along those lines but just drew a blank. Nicely constructed 😁  --Mr Dome
Tony Edwards Vote score: 30292Tony Edwards

🎵 I do like a beer beside the seaside 🎵

04/12/19 13:00:22

 
dave the rave Vote score: 216dave the rave

WE'RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER FUNNEL.

04/12/19 17:06:28

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 9595Vanessa the Guesser

There's always somebody up for a pub crawl.

04/12/19 12:18:00

 
The Wolf Vote score: 5037The Wolf

"and then the court said that Daisy had to live with her Dad and I could only see her on a Saturday. Can you believe that?...DAISY, HURRY UP AND FINISH WASHING YOURSELF...AND IF YOU NEED A POO, GO NOW, THE PUBLIC TOILETS ARE TEN PENCE...Honestly, I don't know why I bothered having a kid, the little cow didn't even put a tenner in my Mother's Day card, and I can't make plans on Saturdays now"

04/12/19 16:10:35

 
stone face Vote score: 5982stone face

"No honey..Scuba Doesn't stand for Self Contained Underwater Beer Apparatus.

04/12/19 15:26:31

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 21035Ian Skelding

"Have fun all."

04/12/19 12:22:51

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 5994Hercules Rockefeller

"Honestly, Patty, you really shouldn't drink & dive."

04/12/19 12:01:11

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 1387Scrijjy Doo

"Hello, Child Protective Services? . . ."

04/12/19 21:25:36

 
The Wolf Vote score: 5037The Wolf

"Julie, you see that couple with their daughter in the yellow ring? They're taking photos. Will you go and stand next to them and censor me while I have a piss please"

04/12/19 15:26:48

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 852Sam Cass

"I know I upset you mummy, but it's a little too late to swallow now."

04/12/19 15:12:29

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 5324Stephen Bean

The Persian Gulp

04/12/19 14:22:58

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5834Greg Curtis

"As she impulsively drowned herself, her other option was 'carefully wade.' "

04/12/19 13:03:08

 
dave the rave Vote score: 216dave the rave

Watershrimp Down.

04/12/19 12:50:55

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 4016Lucky Elperro

Cult hero indeed, but it was lttle known that Popeye was also a bully and was known to make his kids watch while he forced Olive to eat spinach.

04/12/19 12:15:09

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 4016Lucky Elperro

Mummy, my colostomy bag really does need emptying.

04/12/19 12:10:03

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 7320Chris Keegan

Since becoming a mother Julie’s drinking has become over the top.

04/12/19 12:00:34

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9600Neil Mackenzie

She lost the pub because she couldn’t cut down her overheads.

05/12/19 5:25:04

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 1387Scrijjy Doo

So, Your Mom's An Alchie

04/12/19 21:24:11

 
Jack Joyce Vote score: 140Jack Joyce

"Mom, first you swapped my bikini top, now your drinking my tropical fruit juice, what's up?"

"your duck arse if I pop your ring"

04/12/19 20:40:18

 
Jack Joyce Vote score: 140Jack Joyce

"They say breast is best! Better get those Supplements down, your baby looks hungry"

04/12/19 17:44:18

 
dave the rave Vote score: 216dave the rave

Is it just me or is trying to keep kids entertained getting harder and harder...........and harder.

04/12/19 17:10:37

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 852Sam Cass

He promised her the Maldives but took them to the North Sea. I'd drink too...

04/12/19 15:10:55

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 9595Vanessa the Guesser

"Mummy, your hair looks nice."
"Swig."

04/12/19 13:00:15

 
dave the rave Vote score: 216dave the rave

Trout tickling: YOUR DOING IT WRONG!

04/12/19 12:43:05

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 7887Mr Dome

I think mummy's nork'll fall out

04/12/19 12:33:30

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 7887Mr Dome

Wow. Mummy's prosthetic legs are colourful and great fun

04/12/19 12:21:44

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 5796Glyn Evans

Leaving your toddler to tackle the plumbing with a plunger will lead to mass flooding. Get an expert to do it, don't rely on child labour.

04/12/19 12:07:36

 
dave the rave Vote score: 216dave the rave

Mommy you haven't been smoking that sea weed again have you?

04/12/19 12:03:48

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 7320Chris Keegan

“Mummy, why are you drinking Daddies’ pot to piss in?”

04/12/19 12:00:18

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 37813Welsh Rarebit

Soupa Diver

04/12/19 12:00:14

 
Molly R Vote score: 1223Molly R

"I wish she hadn't made me hold the one which she used on her bottom."

04/12/19 12:00:08

 
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