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Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 8780Vanessa the Guesser

"So, how many weeks since you got laid?"

03/09/19 20:01:26

 
stone face Vote score: 4797stone face

🎵 " Egrets I've had a few." 🎵

03/09/19 20:23:02

 1
Paul Reeve Vote score: 4966Paul Reeve

High Four

03/09/19 20:00:16

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 36561Welsh Rarebit

"What do you mean 'I've got crows feet'!"

03/09/19 20:00:05

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 2630Karyn Harrison

"Put your wallet away, I'm footing the bill."

03/09/19 20:19:44

 
James Lennox Vote score: 2581James Lennox

🎼Dah dah da-da da-da
Dah dah da-da da-da
Dah dah da-da da-da
Dah-da-da-da-da-da-da-da

03/09/19 20:12:48

 14
I think I can-can get it ;)  --Sauce Pan
The Wolf Vote score: 3816The Wolf

"NO DAVE, NO FILMING"
That Attenborough is getting right on my tits

03/09/19 20:07:09

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 36561Welsh Rarebit

"I swear that the evidence that I shall give, shall be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me God."

03/09/19 20:04:32

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 3895Stephen Bean

"I'm trying to improve my bank balance."

03/09/19 20:23:14

 
James Lennox Vote score: 2581James Lennox

Some say Hitler never died, but instead fled to South America and took up taxidermy.

03/09/19 20:03:24

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 4403Vivvy En

"Move over, Michael Flatley... I'll take over the Riverdance from heron."

03/09/19 20:29:25

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 7102Mr Dome

That is illogical captain, said the Vulcan

03/09/19 22:27:40

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 12890Dan Nicholls

TWIG HEIL!

03/09/19 21:17:02

 
General Zod Vote score: 3393General Zod

Wader on the lost bark

03/09/19 20:30:35

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 20831Ian Skelding

High flyve

03/09/19 20:25:38

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 726Sam Cass

"Pssst! I've been heron a lot of rumours about a certain owl and a pussycat."

03/09/19 20:18:59

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 726Sam Cass

"On my mother's nest, Sharon, it was one stupid night. That bird meant nothing to me!"

03/09/19 20:16:42

 
The Wolf Vote score: 3816The Wolf

"NUMBER 43? Cheeseburger, regular fries, a diet coke and a side order of worms..."

03/09/19 20:09:53

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 36561Welsh Rarebit

The Ministry of Silly Squawks

03/09/19 20:06:09

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 6207Chris Keegan

Birds vote against a no deal eggs it.

03/09/19 20:05:07

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 2630Karyn Harrison

"How!"

03/09/19 20:04:14

 
Anna Caddy Vote score: 245Anna Caddy

Talk to the foot cuz the face ain’t listening

03/09/19 20:01:53

 
Barrie Bullock Vote score: 447Barrie Bullock

I swear to uphold the law so help me Trump.

04/09/19 13:45:58

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 413Willie Johnson

"What's up?"
"My buddy's superglued my toe to my face."
"A little peeved are we?"
"I'll say, I'm a little Bittern."

04/09/19 9:05:15

 1
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9316Neil Mackenzie

Once bittern twice four toed shy.

04/09/19 7:36:52

 
Anna Caddy Vote score: 245Anna Caddy

Psst! Wanna see some postcards?

04/09/19 6:39:14

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 1034Scrijjy Doo

I've heard of flipping someone the bird, but this is ridiculous.

03/09/19 23:45:38

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 12890Dan Nicholls

The Bird Reich

03/09/19 22:57:07

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 1034Scrijjy Doo

Some people amuse themselves staring at pictures of birds.

03/09/19 21:57:14

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 36561Welsh Rarebit

"This damn nail varnish is taking forever to dry!"

03/09/19 21:39:54

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19303John Glover

"Watch out, he's Old Bill, flying squad."

03/09/19 21:27:19

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 7102Mr Dome

Well. The Amazon tress are still really hot

03/09/19 21:04:29

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22119Michael Winner

*whisper* "The Siberan Cossackbird is so named because of its' tendency to drink heavily the night before."

03/09/19 21:01:51

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 29751Tony Edwards

Fourplay

03/09/19 20:49:33

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 3731Lucky Elperro

From the safety of the other side of the river, Bert flashed his delicacies at the Chinese tourists who'd forgotten their packed lunch.

03/09/19 20:46:14

 
The Wolf Vote score: 3816The Wolf

Put your hand up if you're sick of being taken the piss out of by captioneers...

03/09/19 20:46:11

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19303John Glover

"Hey Mo, if your feeling better gives a hand getting rid of these mites from my feathers."
"Sorry Jerry, not quite feeling up to scratch."

03/09/19 20:41:26

 
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 3731Lucky Elperro

Oi Wally - what is the sound of one hand clapping?

03/09/19 20:38:46

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 6207Chris Keegan

So, you're saying it wasn't just one that flew over the cuckoo's nest?

03/09/19 20:27:45

 
larry G. Vote score: 1343larry G.

"So long dear, have a safe flight."

03/09/19 20:18:05

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 726Sam Cass

Wise prophets fourtwoed the birth of he who would save them all.

03/09/19 20:14:55

 
larry G. Vote score: 1343larry G.

"Stubbed my damn toe in the gym."

03/09/19 20:14:53

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 2443Stu Dent

Balancing the rooks

03/09/19 20:04:59

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 8780Vanessa the Guesser

"I want to get nearer to those tits"

03/09/19 20:03:36

 
The Wolf Vote score: 3816The Wolf

Meanwhile, in the Star Wars avian parallel universe, Yoda attempts to raise the Millennium Falcon...

03/09/19 20:03:03

 
Mark England Vote score: 15225Mark England

"It's mine. I saw it first"
"Ok, Ok. Keep your heron"

03/09/19 20:02:34

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 2630Karyn Harrison

I think he's a waving bird.

03/09/19 20:01:28

 
James Lennox Vote score: 2581James Lennox

"No photos please ... I'm having a bad feather day."

03/09/19 20:00:32

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 1992Crunchy Chords

"All those in favour of using our time machine to FIRST kill Hitler, THEN erase the last 39 months?"

03/09/19 20:00:25

 
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