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"Order what you like boys, Doreen and the triplets are meeting us with the money from that handbag robbery".
"Order what you like boys, Doreen and the triplets are meeting us with the money from that handbag robbery". photo | portfolio
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Matt Schtick Vote score: 77Matt Schtick

"Order what you like boys, Doreen and the triplets are meeting us with the money from that handbag robbery".

04/09/18 12:14:42

 2
That's true, Barrie. Somebody I tried to recruit to this site had a look and said there were captions she didn't understand, and sure enough, they were the captions referring to previous pictures. --Pussy Galore
stone face Vote score: 3115stone face

"I'll have a 6 inch sub please and just put it on my bill."

04/09/18 11:09:14

 
John Llamas Vote score: 19672John Llamas

The job is OK but some of the customers are just fowl ..

04/09/18 11:25:37

 
John  Glover Vote score: 18347John Glover

"Sorry for the delay lads, but the manager knocked himself unconscious on the edge of the counter when I shouted 'duck'."

04/09/18 11:19:29

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 2913Dave Bryan

''We may as well leave. The bird feeder is empty.''

04/09/18 11:08:58

 2
Thanks for the compliment. Yes, it's a bit tedious seeing recycled captions. However, you have to be realistic, Pete. You've been on the site for over nine years. I've only been here for seven months and I'm seeing the same jokes over and over... --Dave Bryan
John  Glover Vote score: 18347John Glover

"I thought you said the quickest way to Regents Park lake was through the subway."

04/09/18 11:06:23

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 34295Welsh Rarebit

"Waddle it be guys?"

04/09/18 11:00:07

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 11786Dan Nicholls

In here for the teal deal.

04/09/18 11:17:14

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 5897Mr Dome

Bugs Bunny serving: 'What sub duck?'

04/09/18 19:26:16

 
Tina Jay Vote score: 51Tina Jay

'Okay, what wise guy built this over our pond'?.

04/09/18 19:18:00

 
Generic RedHead Vote score: 178Generic RedHead

"Hi we're looking for Eider, does she still work here?"

05/09/18 14:25:03

 
Carey Sutton Vote score: 514Carey Sutton

A round of duck and

05/09/18 10:05:57

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 3685Vivvy En

"So ducks, what do you think to a Subway?"
"CACK, CACK, CACK. It's CACK."

04/09/18 18:12:28

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5466Tosser Wivlov

They're for subway's equivalent of the chicken Mc'Sandwich.

04/09/18 16:58:38

 
Dave E Vote score: 401Dave E

You have to hand it to Subway - their ingredients are fresh

04/09/18 16:23:25

 
Sam Cass Vote score: 289Sam Cass

"What do we want?"
"Just ice"
"And when do we want it?"
"Now!"

Ducks protesting the recent summer heatwave.

04/09/18 14:07:27

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 5070Glyn Evans

"Is this the pondland store?"

04/09/18 13:42:37

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

This place isn't all it's quacked up to be.

04/09/18 13:24:11

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 3685Vivvy En

"OK, it'll have to do seeing as we're all feeling peckish."

04/09/18 13:21:17

 
Barking Mad Vote score: 141Barking Mad

A sneaky beak into the afterlife.

04/09/18 12:42:01

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 4507Chris Keegan

Clearly in disguise and looking for somewhere to lay their Greggs

04/09/18 12:27:36

 
Leroy Brown Vote score: 7703Leroy Brown

Stock rotation

04/09/18 12:14:14

 
John  Glover Vote score: 18347John Glover

"Sometimes they throw us yesterdays bread, trouble is it's so hard you canardly eat it."

04/09/18 11:59:58

 
C CaMel Vote score: 3956C CaMel

Cunard to decide.

04/09/18 11:42:03

 
Paul Reeve Vote score: 4741Paul Reeve

“How many times do I have to tell you lot? we don’t sell orange sauce.”

04/09/18 11:38:03

 
John Llamas Vote score: 19672John Llamas

"No ….. I said has anyone seen my grater.."

04/09/18 11:34:17

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 21163Michael Winner

"Never seen you guys in here before- are you from out of town?"
"Yeah, we're from Newark."

04/09/18 11:33:25

 
John Llamas Vote score: 19672John Llamas

Since Subway introduce their new menu, some of the customers were like a duck out of water.

04/09/18 11:32:16

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 1827Karyn Harrison

"Let's have a gander at the menu!"

04/09/18 11:28:40

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 1827Karyn Harrison

Standing ducks

04/09/18 11:26:05

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 21163Michael Winner

"Ask him if we can get from Coney Island to Lexington using the IRT."

04/09/18 11:21:27

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 21163Michael Winner

"Whatever happened to your cousin who got that KFC job?"

04/09/18 11:16:23

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 21163Michael Winner

Typical quackheads.

04/09/18 11:15:00

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 7232Vanessa the Guesser

♫ Down in the tube station at midnight ♫

04/09/18 11:14:05

 
stone face Vote score: 3115stone face

"I'll just have some cheese and quackers ."

04/09/18 11:07:54

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 2913Dave Bryan

''Why don't we fly to our new pond?''

''It's quicker to use the subway.''

04/09/18 11:04:53

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 28374Tony Edwards

"You are gander wrong way round."

04/09/18 11:04:35

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5277Greg Curtis

"Do I hear a duck behind me?"

"Sord of..."

04/09/18 11:04:06

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 7232Vanessa the Guesser

I thought it was old McDonalds who had a farm?

04/09/18 11:03:35

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 4507Chris Keegan

I so wanted to feed them however I simply couldn’t decide between the 9 grain wheat, the honey oat, the Italian white, the herb and cheese, the Monterey Cheddar or the flatbread….

04/09/18 11:03:10

 
Molly Romanov Vote score: 694Molly Romanov

See that red sign? "New - Pan Fried Chicken". Well, that lets us off the hook!

04/09/18 11:02:29

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 28374Tony Edwards

"I Canada decide what to have."

04/09/18 11:01:50

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 34295Welsh Rarebit

"Queue-ack!"

04/09/18 11:00:16

 
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