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"Well, I didnt expect it to be octagonal," thought the sperm.
"Well, I didnt expect it to be octagonal," thought the sperm. photo | portfolio
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James Lennox Vote score: 6140James Lennox

"Well, I didn't expect it to be octagonal," thought the sperm.

31/01/20 17:07:16

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 11817Stephen Bean

Mary Poppins has some pretty weird underwear.

31/01/20 12:00:05

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 13092Vanessa the Guesser

Men are like umbrellas. Too much wind and they're useless. Personally, I left mine in the pub.

31/01/20 13:08:34

 
The Wolf Vote score: 8107The Wolf

Nigel Farage arrives to give his Brexit speech. Unfortunately, the venue is opposite a McDonald's which currently has a promotion on milkshakes.

31/01/20 13:38:47

 3
why waste a milkshake when a dog turd would do. --stone face
Lucky Elperro Vote score: 4654Lucky Elperro

Cleaning the urethras, the old fashioned way, may alleviate the insanity of persistant remoaners.

31/01/20 16:23:19

 
Dot Old Vote score: 1140Dot Old

Dark web

31/01/20 12:31:46

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32513Tony Edwards

Parachuting for beginners.

31/01/20 12:28:12

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 4497Stu Dent

Camper wakes up to discover Brexit was just a dream.

31/01/20 12:23:28

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9321Chris Keegan

Gosh, this takes me back. I had a sheltered childhood.

31/01/20 12:06:30

 
GeeDee Vote score: 2858GeeDee

Underbrella

31/01/20 15:34:56

 
The Wolf Vote score: 8107The Wolf

"Ok...you go first Dave". *Tiny man slides down the black fireman's pole to the big black crash mat beneath*. "Wow, look at this new town I've discovered, I'm going to call it Caption Town. Now that I can see the bigger picture, I wonder what wonderful things I'll find here.. Oh look, there's a mannequin shop"

31/01/20 12:30:11

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 32513Tony Edwards

Gamping

31/01/20 12:19:31

 
The Wolf Vote score: 8107The Wolf

"I'm not taking any chances, Gulliver's got the shits"

31/01/20 12:06:17

 
Molly R Vote score: 2068Molly R

There must be a better way to cope with this leaking tent

31/01/20 12:00:38

 
J Gaskill Vote score: 109J Gaskill

Thomas shoved off with Sir Topham Hatt's umbrella, open with the grip between his teeth. This made Sir Topham Hatt very cross. Yes, very cross indeed.

31/01/20 22:06:26

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 6400Vivvy En

The street was the place to go. It was just about half past ten... Dammit! The girls couldn't get their brollies down in time.

31/01/20 19:55:51

 
Trace Sarge Vote score: 2562Trace Sarge

Octical illusion

31/01/20 19:16:08

 
Karyn Harrison Vote score: 4974Karyn Harrison

"Nick, you're missing 'Ask the Family'!"

31/01/20 17:36:37

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2672Scrijjy Doo

It's not polite to look under a lady's skirt, especially when she's ovulating.

31/01/20 16:54:20

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 11000Neil Mackenzie

A clever Remainer looks up and sees the dark cloud hanging over Britain. The stupid Leaver says put your brolly down it’s not even raining.

31/01/20 14:36:40

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 9321Chris Keegan

It's that moment when the wife looks up to see if it's stopped raining.

31/01/20 13:22:41

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

Next season, VAR will be trialling mini cameras in the balls. This should capture any facial hair off-side.

31/01/20 13:16:42

 
Rachel P Vote score: 2304Rachel P

Last thing the acrobat saw falling from his trapeze

31/01/20 12:51:51

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 10179Mr Dome

I was so addicted to this umbrella game I could never put it down

31/01/20 12:25:55

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 1971Mark Wilson

This club only employed really skinny pole dancers.

31/01/20 12:06:46

 
Mark Wilson Vote score: 1971Mark Wilson

It's ok, Rhianna said I could stand under here.

31/01/20 12:05:20

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

You've heard of Rodin's 'The Thinker'? Well, this is Rude Annes's 'The Sphincter'

31/01/20 12:00:32

 
Dot Old Vote score: 1140Dot Old

Brolly dolly

31/01/20 12:00:09

 
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