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January at the Jobcentre.
January at the Jobcentre. photo | portfolio
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Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 11496Vanessa the Guesser

January at the Jobcentre.

30/12/19 16:56:53

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9003Dave Bryan

BREAKING NEWS: Corbyn quits Labour and joins Christmas Party.

30/12/19 12:01:19

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9412Mr Dome

'This year Santa I want a cure for Parkinson's disease'

30/12/19 12:21:50

 
Rachel P Vote score: 1468Rachel P

When you all realise this isn't your bus

30/12/19 12:19:36

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 31425Tony Edwards

Old Ged cannot control his wanking hand when there is a woman around.

30/12/19 12:31:29

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8412Chris Keegan

Unfortunately Colin thought he was attending a SELF Help group.

30/12/19 14:58:31

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 11496Vanessa the Guesser

♫ Oh commode all ye faithful ♫

30/12/19 13:37:38

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 21929Ian Skelding

"Dad?"

30/12/19 16:29:16

 
Rachel P Vote score: 1468Rachel P

♪ There were three on the bench and Willie Nelson said “Roll over, roll over” ♪

30/12/19 12:01:06

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2095Scrijjy Doo

"Sorry kid, you're too late."

30/12/19 18:32:37

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 2095Scrijjy Doo

"Sorry little boy. I can't give you an erection."

30/12/19 18:32:25

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 3201Crunchy Chords

No one wanted to sit on the lap of his creepy brother, 'Uncle Christmas'.

30/12/19 17:19:40

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 4637Kenny Ireland

"I've checked the list of cowBOYS and you are not on it. Only Billy the KID, Alan LAD and John WAIN are allowed to sit on Santa's knee".

30/12/19 17:15:59

 
The Wolf Vote score: 6973The Wolf

"...and then I realised it wasn't Santa, it was Satan in disguise. Then his evil goblin chair swallowed us and took us to Hell. That's the last time I'm going to a Grotto in Farmfoods"

30/12/19 16:26:08

 
Jack Joyce Vote score: 347Jack Joyce

...What would you like for Christmas my dear?

..Could you make my head face forwards?

30/12/19 14:58:17

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20324John Glover

♫ Good, good, good vibrations ...

30/12/19 14:32:29

 1
Good Beach Boys reference. --Willie Johnson
The Wolf Vote score: 6973The Wolf

I don't know. The things they make you do on community service...

30/12/19 14:12:12

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

I'm sure the only thing that those poor old biddies in the home for senile dementia want, is presents of mind.

30/12/19 13:40:00

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9003Dave Bryan

It may only be the sixth day of Christmas but it looks like some of the lights have already gone out.

30/12/19 12:10:17

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6510Glyn Evans

December 30, 2019. Christmas 2020 begins.

30/12/19 12:09:13

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

I didn't know that Santa visits Dignitas?

30/12/19 12:08:24

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9223Stephen Bean

Don't you just hate it when someone turns up wearing the same outfit.

30/12/19 12:00:06

 
Poxy Jock Vote score: 86Poxy Jock

Dave's mind wandered as he thought "Why does it look like she has got a pair of small boots on her chest?" but then came the reveal.

30/12/19 20:26:27

 
P Hagley P Hagley

When you have social anxiety and your parents force you to converse with a stranger about what you want for Christmas..
'It has literally felt like I've been sitting here for 72 years'.

30/12/19 16:03:23

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 3742Stu Dent

Last Christmas

30/12/19 12:56:12

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 6510Glyn Evans

The Santa pickpocket gang strike again.

30/12/19 12:12:24

 
Dev B Vote score: 601Dev B

Steven Spielberg arrives on sets to shoot Home Alone 7 (A night with gay Santa)

30/12/19 12:10:35

 
sarah solway Vote score: 103sarah solway

"One day son this will all be yours."

31/12/19 17:06:15

 
Anthony Smith Vote score: 70Anthony Smith

So you want to be a Santa...

31/12/19 10:53:17

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 1360Willie Johnson

The home for notions that aren't believed any more gains a couple of new "Santas", plus the idea that old people don't (*ahem*) when little Timmy walked in on his Grandpa.

30/12/19 19:15:21

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 5607Vivvy En

"Psst, Steve... Call me Nicholas when I'm at work," said Dave.

30/12/19 16:54:37

 
P Hagley P Hagley

I do believe in Santa, I do, I do.

30/12/19 16:07:25

 
P Hagley P Hagley

She says you can't be too old to see Santa but I know my wife just wants to sit on another mans knee.

30/12/19 16:01:04

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 10552Neil Mackenzie

Democrats are allowed to ask Santa to impeach President Trump after their average mental age is determined to be six.

30/12/19 15:13:11

 
Jack Joyce Vote score: 347Jack Joyce

"Santa, you've overdone it. You've got a beard belly and the Slendertone having a profound effect on the old fella "

30/12/19 14:32:12

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 6095Greg Curtis

"OF course I'm grateful, but I was in line for SEVENTY FIVE YEARS."

30/12/19 12:41:50

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 6095Greg Curtis

“He never got picked up.”

30/12/19 12:32:44

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9003Dave Bryan

''How did Santa get his Lonsdale belt?''

''He knocked out five kids in one afternoon.''

30/12/19 12:29:45

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9412Mr Dome

Frigging fake Santas. They'll let any old cowboy outfit do it these days

30/12/19 12:20:22

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9003Dave Bryan

''I've got it! I've got it! You're Santa Claus.''

30/12/19 12:16:55

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8412Chris Keegan

Young Michael, aged 8, is absolutely delighted with his grumpy old man costume from Santa.

30/12/19 12:06:19

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 9223Stephen Bean

Santa always found it hard to get enthusiastic about handing out incontinence pads at the old people's home.

30/12/19 12:01:18

 
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