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January at the Jobcentre.
January at the Jobcentre. photo | portfolio
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Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 10042Vanessa the Guesser

January at the Jobcentre.

30/12/19 16:56:53

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 6747Dave Bryan

BREAKING NEWS: Corbyn quits Labour and joins Christmas Party.

30/12/19 12:01:19

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 8344Mr Dome

'This year Santa I want a cure for Parkinson's disease'

30/12/19 12:21:50

 
Rachel P Vote score: 327Rachel P

When you all realise this isn't your bus

30/12/19 12:19:36

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 30486Tony Edwards

Old Ged cannot control his wanking hand when there is a woman around.

30/12/19 12:31:29

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 7821Chris Keegan

Unfortunately Colin thought he was attending a SELF Help group.

30/12/19 14:58:31

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 10042Vanessa the Guesser

♫ Oh commode all ye faithful ♫

30/12/19 13:37:38

 
Ian Skelding Vote score: 21175Ian Skelding

"Dad?"

30/12/19 16:29:16

 
Rachel P Vote score: 327Rachel P

♪ There were three on the bench and Willie Nelson said “Roll over, roll over” ♪

30/12/19 12:01:06

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 1571Scrijjy Doo

"Sorry kid, you're too late."

30/12/19 18:32:37

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 1571Scrijjy Doo

"Sorry little boy. I can't give you an erection."

30/12/19 18:32:25

 
Crunchy Chords Vote score: 2591Crunchy Chords

No one wanted to sit on the lap of his creepy brother, 'Uncle Christmas'.

30/12/19 17:19:40

 
Kenny Ireland Vote score: 4563Kenny Ireland

"I've checked the list of cowBOYS and you are not on it. Only Billy the KID, Alan LAD and John WAIN are allowed to sit on Santa's knee".

30/12/19 17:15:59

 
The Wolf Vote score: 5438The Wolf

"...and then I realised it wasn't Santa, it was Satan in disguise. Then his evil goblin chair swallowed us and took us to Hell. That's the last time I'm going to a Grotto in Farmfoods"

30/12/19 16:26:08

 
Jack Joyce Vote score: 347Jack Joyce

...What would you like for Christmas my dear?

..Could you make my head face forwards?

30/12/19 14:58:17

 
John  Glover Vote score: 19795John Glover

♫ Good, good, good vibrations ...

30/12/19 14:32:29

 1
Good Beach Boys reference. --Willie Johnson
The Wolf Vote score: 5438The Wolf

I don't know. The things they make you do on community service...

30/12/19 14:12:12

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38480Welsh Rarebit

I'm sure the only thing that those poor old biddies in the home for senile dementia want, is presents of mind.

30/12/19 13:40:00

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 6747Dave Bryan

It may only be the sixth day of Christmas but it looks like some of the lights have already gone out.

30/12/19 12:10:17

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 5960Glyn Evans

December 30, 2019. Christmas 2020 begins.

30/12/19 12:09:13

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38480Welsh Rarebit

I didn't know that Santa visits Dignitas?

30/12/19 12:08:24

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 6080Stephen Bean

Don't you just hate it when someone turns up wearing the same outfit.

30/12/19 12:00:06

 
Poxy Jock Vote score: 82Poxy Jock

Dave's mind wandered as he thought "Why does it look like she has got a pair of small boots on her chest?" but then came the reveal.

30/12/19 20:26:27

 
P Hagley P Hagley

When you have social anxiety and your parents force you to converse with a stranger about what you want for Christmas..
'It has literally felt like I've been sitting here for 72 years'.

30/12/19 16:03:23

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 3009Stu Dent

Last Christmas

30/12/19 12:56:12

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 5960Glyn Evans

The Santa pickpocket gang strike again.

30/12/19 12:12:24

 
Dev B Vote score: 459Dev B

Steven Spielberg arrives on sets to shoot Home Alone 7 (A night with gay Santa)

30/12/19 12:10:35

 
sarah solway Vote score: 100sarah solway

"One day son this will all be yours."

31/12/19 17:06:15

 
Anthony Smith Vote score: 69Anthony Smith

So you want to be a Santa...

31/12/19 10:53:17

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 910Willie Johnson

The home for notions that aren't believed any more gains a couple of new "Santas", plus the idea that old people don't (*ahem*) when little Timmy walked in on his Grandpa.

30/12/19 19:15:21

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 4909Vivvy En

"Psst, Steve... Call me Nicholas when I'm at work," said Dave.

30/12/19 16:54:37

 
P Hagley P Hagley

I do believe in Santa, I do, I do.

30/12/19 16:07:25

 
P Hagley P Hagley

She says you can't be too old to see Santa but I know my wife just wants to sit on another mans knee.

30/12/19 16:01:04

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9720Neil Mackenzie

Democrats are allowed to ask Santa to impeach President Trump after their average mental age is determined to be six.

30/12/19 15:13:11

 
Jack Joyce Vote score: 347Jack Joyce

"Santa, you've overdone it. You've got a beard belly and the Slendertone having a profound effect on the old fella "

30/12/19 14:32:12

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5935Greg Curtis

"OF course I'm grateful, but I was in line for SEVENTY FIVE YEARS."

30/12/19 12:41:50

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5935Greg Curtis

“He never got picked up.”

30/12/19 12:32:44

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 6747Dave Bryan

''How did Santa get his Lonsdale belt?''

''He knocked out five kids in one afternoon.''

30/12/19 12:29:45

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 8344Mr Dome

Frigging fake Santas. They'll let any old cowboy outfit do it these days

30/12/19 12:20:22

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 6747Dave Bryan

''I've got it! I've got it! You're Santa Claus.''

30/12/19 12:16:55

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 7821Chris Keegan

Young Michael, aged 8, is absolutely delighted with his grumpy old man costume from Santa.

30/12/19 12:06:19

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 6080Stephen Bean

Santa always found it hard to get enthusiastic about handing out incontinence pads at the old people's home.

30/12/19 12:01:18

 
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