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Elsie had turned up for her plastic surgery operation on time, but unfortunately shed been sent to the wrong theatre.
Elsie had turned up for her plastic surgery operation on time, but unfortunately shed been sent to the wrong theatre. photo | portfolio
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Pablo Vote score: 3393Pablo

Elsie had turned up for her plastic surgery operation on time, but unfortunately she'd been sent to the wrong theatre.

30/03/18 11:38:11

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

"She's got no sense of direction. We were meant to be tunnelling into the bank next door."

30/03/18 9:49:05

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 14611Dan Nicholls

Another scathing review from the latest in a long line of faceless critics.

30/03/18 8:33:49

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

"It's only a blackhead, Maureen."

30/03/18 8:07:46

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

"Tesco Value Productions presents 'The Phantom of the Opera'."

30/03/18 8:06:32

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 390Gavin Smithers

Left lower seven, occlusion, amalgam filling. All other teeth extracted.

30/03/18 10:58:17

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 390Gavin Smithers

"It's bad news, I'm afraid. You've got asbestos in the ceiling".

30/03/18 10:36:39

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 38790Welsh Rarebit

For stealing cash, usherette Marge was given the sack.

30/03/18 8:37:42

 
John  Glover Vote score: 20357John Glover

"Come down Mary Smith."
"How did you know it was me sir?"
"Your name is sewn on your shoebag, idiot."

30/03/18 12:15:13

 
Pussy Galore Vote score: 7065Pussy Galore

That'll teach her not to eat popcorn in the theatre.

30/03/18 10:01:50

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 14611Dan Nicholls

Where's Waldorf?

30/03/18 8:34:13

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 22855Michael Winner

Anonymuse.

30/03/18 8:00:51

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 9435Mr Dome

Victoria was big, but is Albert Hall?

30/03/18 22:28:45

 
larry G. Vote score: 1471larry G.

Undercover security.

30/03/18 19:00:03

 
Gavin Smithers Vote score: 390Gavin Smithers

The Ku Klux Klan claims its recruitment drive is going well.

30/03/18 15:10:20

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 5680Vivvy En

The performance was so exciting that she had to container self

30/03/18 10:22:24

 
Paul Gledhill Vote score: 177Paul Gledhill

Critic who vowed never to show her face in the opera house again can't resist temptation.

30/03/18 10:05:14

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 11541Vanessa the Guesser

She's obviously not much of a theatregoer.

30/03/18 9:02:19

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9083Dave Bryan

Bagpuss

30/03/18 8:46:14

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8468Chris Keegan

A new production of Hidehead revisited

30/03/18 8:43:08

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 11541Vanessa the Guesser

No need for the bag. It was her box I didn't like.

30/03/18 8:36:39

 
tony kelly Vote score: 1273tony kelly

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hide.

30/03/18 8:19:31

 
tony kelly Vote score: 1273tony kelly

Opera bluff.

30/03/18 8:15:50

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 8468Chris Keegan

She couldn't face going to the theatre

30/03/18 8:13:43

 
stone face Vote score: 7485stone face

The theatre was praised for its support of diversity by giving a job to the Elephant man's daughter.

30/03/18 8:09:10

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 9083Dave Bryan

Womanhood

30/03/18 8:04:19

 
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