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If youre a real psychopath, why dont you stab my brother in the face?
If youre a real psychopath, why dont you stab my brother in the face? photo | portfolio
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Dave Bryan Vote score: 6218Dave Bryan

''If you're a real psychopath, why don't you stab my brother in the face?''

25/11/19 12:31:24

 
Davie Marshall Vote score: 711Davie Marshall

"Ask me again for the gluten free kids menu. I dare you."

25/11/19 12:13:57

 
Dave Bryan Vote score: 6218Dave Bryan

''So you're the little sod who put my glasses in the baking mixture......''

25/11/19 12:04:57

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9586Neil Mackenzie

The dummy had frightened school children all over the country till they took the exhibition to a London School. The dummy was stabbed five hundred and twenty times and there was only thirty nine kids in the class.

25/11/19 12:30:34

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 5277Stephen Bean

"Did your parents vote for Brexit?"

25/11/19 12:24:04

 1
“Yes, please let us leave .” 😂 --Paul Reeve
Chris Keegan Vote score: 7299Chris Keegan

“DAVE!!!! When I said ‘CUT’ it meant we’ve finished this scene with the kids! Now go and get a mop…….”

25/11/19 16:17:43

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5816Greg Curtis

" 'Why the knife?'...Cuz I'm against guns."

25/11/19 12:40:17

 
The Wolf Vote score: 4974The Wolf

"Second thoughts, sir, maybe I'm not desperate for a slash"

25/11/19 12:15:29

 
Stephen Bean Vote score: 5277Stephen Bean

"Sorry, I thought it was Friday 13th. I can't read the calendar since my glasses went missing."

25/11/19 12:13:08

 1
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5816Greg Curtis

"How did you know? Star for you, is it Timmy: Yes, I AM American."

25/11/19 12:51:21

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 5781Glyn Evans

"Come off it. You're not scary. That lady who tried to groom us with her sweet house was much scarier, wasn't she Gretel?"

25/11/19 12:17:37

 
The Wolf Vote score: 4974The Wolf

"Hello, can I urgently speak to the headmaster please, It's regarding Mrs Daisy's CRB check..."

25/11/19 12:10:45

 
Davie Marshall Vote score: 711Davie Marshall

Santa's bouncers were taking no shit this year.

25/11/19 12:01:32

 
Scrijjy Doo Vote score: 1364Scrijjy Doo

Which one of you kids is Greta Thunberg?

26/11/19 14:52:28

 
Stu Dent Vote score: 2819Stu Dent

Carlsberg don't make Truancy Officers but if thay did.

25/11/19 18:27:34

 
Jack Joyce Vote score: 133Jack Joyce

"Knuckles looks the same but I don't like what they've done with Sonic"

25/11/19 17:52:43

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 769Willie Johnson

"Thank you so much, Jimmy, how did you know that I needed this kind of knife. What's that red stuff on the end of it?"
"Don't worry, where you're going you won't need to know."

25/11/19 17:30:19

 
Willie Johnson Vote score: 769Willie Johnson

"This guy ran by and said 'hold this'. I wonder why?"

25/11/19 17:26:08

 
Trace Sarge Vote score: 2524Trace Sarge

Sharp intake of breathe

25/11/19 16:48:43

 
dave the rave Vote score: 166dave the rave

The new headmaster liked to ensure the kids in his class all get the point.

25/11/19 14:49:24

 
dave the rave Vote score: 166dave the rave

Michael Myers wasn't much of a fan of Bratwurst.

25/11/19 14:33:43

 
Emanerof Emanrus Emanerof Emanrus

Hallotween.

25/11/19 14:27:44

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 7835Mr Dome

Smile. You're on Candead Camera

25/11/19 13:39:41

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5816Greg Curtis

"Don't worry, it's not the school I dislike, it's the principal of the the thing......Tough crowd, someday you'll get it. WHERE'S THE OFFICE?"

25/11/19 12:48:10

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5816Greg Curtis

"Don't worry, your teacher will be RIGHT BACK in a coffin."

25/11/19 12:44:36

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 9578Vanessa the Guesser

"I don't know about you but I could murder a KitKat."

25/11/19 12:19:14

 1
You mean a kidkat.  --dave the rave
Davie Marshall Vote score: 711Davie Marshall

"Oh sorry kid, I thought this was a Wetherspoons."

25/11/19 12:08:05

 
James Lennox Vote score: 3599James Lennox

"Really? Your favourite horror character is Jason Voorhees? And you're totally sure about that?"

25/11/19 13:46:43

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5816Greg Curtis

"Yes, you can go to the nurse. If can be patient foR JUST a minute, SHE WON'T NEED A PASS."

25/11/19 12:54:44

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5816Greg Curtis

"No, actually, I'm against violins in schools. Too bad."

25/11/19 12:49:40

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5816Greg Curtis

"Is it just ME, kid, or do you ever feel 'this stabbing sensation' y'know, just below your stuck-up nose?..."

25/11/19 12:42:51

 
Davie Marshall Vote score: 711Davie Marshall

"Could I have a roly-poly for dessert please?"

"Sure, will this one do?"

25/11/19 12:27:41

 
Paul Reeve Vote score: 5159Paul Reeve

I could guess what’s going on here, but to be fair it would only be a stab in the park.

25/11/19 12:19:24

 
Davie Marshall Vote score: 711Davie Marshall

... but on the advert it said, 'kids, eat free'. I'd like to talk to the manager.

25/11/19 12:17:27

 
Hercules  Rockefeller Vote score: 5986Hercules Rockefeller

"Hello, kids, are you ready for the pumpkin carving contest?"

25/11/19 12:15:40

 1
The Wolf Vote score: 4974The Wolf

Schools are continuing to face severe cuts

25/11/19 12:06:19

 
Davie Marshall Vote score: 711Davie Marshall

Try our new menu. The shank is to die for.

25/11/19 12:01:11

 
Welsh Rarebit Vote score: 37739Welsh Rarebit

Trick or Threat?

25/11/19 12:01:05

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 7299Chris Keegan

Looking daggers

25/11/19 12:00:08

 
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