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"See Debs, told you it was a good idea to keep the Umbilical cord."
"See Debs, told you it was a good idea to keep the Umbilical cord." photo | portfolio
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Ian Skelding Vote score: 20556Ian Skelding

"See Debs, told you it was a good idea to keep the Umbilical cord."

23/09/15 8:00:13

 
John Llamas Vote score: 19751John Llamas

The strand that rocks the cradle

23/09/15 8:01:15

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 12380Dan Nicholls

"The slide? Oh that's easy. I just put her tin vest on and get the big magnet out".

23/09/15 9:29:21

 
Tommy FlashBangWallop Vote score: 1412Tommy FlashBangWallop

C'mon lazy, jump off and get me a top up.

23/09/15 8:24:56

 
Cath Jones Vote score: 35633Cath Jones

These days Fosters parents aren't what they used to be.

23/09/15 8:58:32

 
Boycie Vote score: 6670Boycie

Even when we were playing, dad always seemed a bit distant.

23/09/15 8:07:25

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5517Greg Curtis

Childbeering

23/09/15 9:13:29

 
John Llamas Vote score: 19751John Llamas

Dave never lost his talent for pulling the girls.

23/09/15 8:04:52

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 21686Michael Winner

*Thinks* "Great- now I need to invent a long-handled beer grasper."

23/09/15 8:00:55

 
Tommy FlashBangWallop Vote score: 1412Tommy FlashBangWallop

After killing her lazy good for nothing husband, she rigged up the corpse for one last hurrah.

23/09/15 8:45:02

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 9135Neil Mackenzie

In cases of complaining or crying pull emergency cord.

23/09/15 8:17:08

 
Anna Vote score: 530Anna

Lazy Boy Decliner.

23/09/15 8:04:53

 
John  Glover Vote score: 18889John Glover

"This baby sitting lark is money for old rope."

23/09/15 11:32:01

 
Tosser Wivlov Vote score: 5590Tosser Wivlov

"Daddy, Could we play hide and seek next?"
"Sorry love, the CCTV's on the blink."

23/09/15 9:42:26

 
Greg Curtis Vote score: 5517Greg Curtis

"Even as a child, I knew I was...different," said Mary Annette.

23/09/15 9:23:53

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 5430Glyn Evans

"You're doing so well Stacey. Only the tight rope walk left and that's the assault course complete."

23/09/15 8:59:17

 
Bad Boy Dennis. Vote score: 1193Bad Boy Dennis.

Bitter Sweet

23/09/15 8:36:58

 1
Tony Edwards Vote score: 29237Tony Edwards

How to play with the kids when you're feeling decidedly ropey.

23/09/15 8:15:28

 
Tracy Davidson Vote score: 9777Tracy Davidson

If Carlsberg made playgrounds…

23/09/15 8:00:22

 
Paul Reeve Vote score: 4830Paul Reeve

"So why do you call your kid YoYo then Dave?"

23/09/15 10:30:43

 
Zac Kramer Vote score: 10993Zac Kramer

Fancy a drink at Stringfellows?

23/09/15 9:21:01

 
Dan Nicholls Vote score: 12380Dan Nicholls

You can't see his other hand because he is also taking the dog for a walk.

23/09/15 9:18:48

 
Ethy Vote score: 2362Ethy

OFSTED can piss off, I am a fucking brilliant childminder.

23/09/15 8:39:03

 
Boycie Vote score: 6670Boycie

Dad's farts were so bad that even "pull my finger" had to be done at a distance.

23/09/15 8:06:40

 
Tracy Davidson Vote score: 9777Tracy Davidson

Bittersuite

23/09/15 8:00:10

 
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