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"No love, I said could you get a DULUX colour chart"

21/10/13 8:21:40

"I'm not a racist .....i actually keep in touch with my coloured mates online."

21/10/13 7:00:30

Four skins.

21/10/13 7:42:54

They hung themselves as they were feeling spermicidal.

21/10/13 7:00:22

Sue was disapointed at her new birdfeeders as she couldn't get them to hold nuts

21/10/13 9:47:39

"John, I've hung out your smalls on the line."

21/10/13 7:04:59

My wife needs to leave more subtle clues for the milkman.

21/10/13 7:04:12

Sorry, I can't come at the moment I've got to get the washing in

21/10/13 7:01:13

Gardening tip of the day:

You should rinse out your seed containers
at least once a year

21/10/13 7:00:10

Well, we're obviously not still in Ken Dodd's garden, because these are clearly not meant for 'diddy' men.

21/10/13 8:07:02

"What are those mummy?"
"Erm, Cream Catchers!"

21/10/13 7:00:46