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"I never knew her before she latched onto me in the supermarket a year ago and I didn't have the heart to tell her to go away. My last 3 boyfriends have left me because of the smell around the flat but worst of all is that stupid hat which she wears everywhere we go."

09/09/12 8:30:19

The years have been kinder to ABBA's Agnetha than they have to Frida.

09/09/12 7:07:55

Tomorrow i'm going to teach grandma to suck eggs.

09/09/12 8:40:08

Old age sucks.

09/09/12 10:46:44

Bill Wyman really knows how to show his dates a good time.

09/09/12 7:16:12

Cause of death.....Brain Freeze

09/09/12 7:01:56

"Right Gran, once that's cooled your mouth down it's back to Old Compton Street for the afternoon shift."

09/09/12 7:29:48

Katie knew this day would soon become much more fun as she waited for the LSD she'd slipped in Nan's drink to take effect.

09/09/12 7:20:30

Janice was now a single girl. Her boyfriend had been told to look at her mum if he wanted to know how she would look in years to come.

09/09/12 9:41:27

"All alcoholic drinks, including cocktails, age the skin prematurely. Ask my twin."

09/09/12 9:24:45