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Tosser Wivlov

signed up: 1 year, 8 months ago
profile viewed: 96 time(s) this week
caption quota: 36
votes given since joining: 1,243
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lol

creative

Nice legs, shame about the faith.

12/02/13 12:46:36

lol

They met each other on the web.

15/01/13 20:42:18

lol

creative

....place casserole in oven, stand on top shelf.

02/05/13 10:03:09

The mourning after the flight before.

10/07/12 12:22:22

The last night of the prams.

07/02/13 9:22:29

The coast road was showing signs of old age.

01/02/13 12:08:46

Incontinence

05/11/11 20:27:52

This is genius man! --Spud Jones

Its the only place he can find Comfort.

03/05/13 12:03:44

That guy out there's been waving at me for ages, but 'll be darned if I know him.

11/03/13 9:58:52

£100
WINNER

Staff were told to prepare themselves in case the company went into liquidation.

28/06/12 11:46:47

Whenever he sat down his drink went flat.

18/11/11 20:03:18

creative

"We'd better get a hire van"
"What we really need mate, is a higher bridge"

04/02/13 9:25:10

Not as happy as they seam.

26/09/12 12:45:14

Ken could not escape from his nightmayor

06/05/12 20:00:39

Costa Del Skol

25/11/12 10:22:48

The walls have smears.

09/07/12 20:00:24

Exorcise

10/12/11 11:59:41

She exercised religiously.

10/12/11 11:42:05

She decided to skip prayers.

10/12/11 11:26:14

Cafe Rouge

27/10/11 20:01:49

The colour of bunny

05/04/13 20:01:27

♫ If you wish upon a bra ♫

18/02/13 1:51:52

This looks like a booby trap.

13/02/13 20:01:47

Like most continental beers it lacks body.

21/01/13 11:29:45

It goes from 0 - 60 okay but to get to no. 78 you have to wind it up again.

20/12/12 9:57:12

..and here's your table sir. Now just wait while I sort you out a stool.

10/11/12 23:45:52

It came free with the arm chair.

02/09/12 12:13:47

creative

He cost me 20 Guinness.

02/05/13 12:20:09

Mamma said if I get lost, to go and stand by something big.

22/04/13 13:13:08

Did I see you girls on Thongs of Praise?

12/02/13 13:01:52

Or are you just wistfully thinking of Thora Hird in Praise Be? --Spud Gunn

Visiting the tattoo artist twice a week its no wonder he's overdrawn.

07/01/13 21:07:02

"No way will you get me in that banger"

31/07/12 20:00:15

Preparing the national dish.

03/07/12 11:09:51

Cunnilinguists

27/01/12 17:15:51

"Does it come with a catholitic converter?"

14/03/13 21:20:48

It was all a bit much to take in.

22/02/13 21:21:14

Too much smoking had made him a little horse.

22/02/13 13:14:44

"Did you screw her?"
"No, I just used strong adhesive"

17/01/13 9:25:16

A Farewell to Arms.

08/01/13 20:00:12

Capital punishment.

21/12/12 9:33:23

T J Hooker

16/12/12 13:07:24

It has little face value.

12/12/12 20:12:11

They were a dog fearing couple.

18/11/12 20:32:36

Hey Steve the smell from this bag of soap powder is making me feel sick. Would you mind holding it for me?

09/08/12 20:09:20

Tip-Toe through the two lips.

17/07/12 20:04:22

It was on the a la carte menu.

03/07/12 11:45:23

Every Sunday Carlo took his sister out for a spin.

29/06/12 11:57:22

When ever her nose started to run Hector reckoned it was time to wash her out.

09/04/12 21:06:16

There was no womb for it inside the shop.

27/01/12 20:26:10

The attendance was too small to show a prophet.

15/01/12 12:28:40

more captions

last comments (total: 124)

Etch Marks?

[anon]

27/04/13
9:05pm

comment on caption:
Stretch marks. [Tosser Wivlov]

Is'nt that a sexual offence?

John Glover

07/04/13
8:23pm

comment on caption:
Muffin the Mule. [Tosser Wivlov]

At the bullring in birmingham

Chris Brooks

16/03/13
12:19pm

comment on caption:
When the sale opened they were expecting a stampede. [Tosser Wivlov]

show

Neil Mackenzie

08/03/13
6:19pm

comment on caption:
He didn't usually shown his face at this type of gathering. [Tosser Wivlov]

Brilliant John- just 'Apple Crumble' would work on its own, but all of it together would make an excellent caption :)

Michael Winner

07/03/13
2:44pm

comment on caption:
So that's where they keep it.(at least its out of farms way) (I guessed it had some connection with blackberries) [Tosser Wivlov]

or perhaps - In need of repair to avoid an Apple and Blackberry crumble

John Llamas

07/03/13
1:49pm

comment on caption:
So that's where they keep it.(at least its out of farms way) (I guessed it had some connection with blackberries) [Tosser Wivlov]

It's got too complex- what about just
"Blackberry Tarts, or Raspberry Pi?"

Michael Winner

07/03/13
1:26pm

comment on caption:
So that's where they keep it.(at least its out of farms way) (I guessed it had some connection with blackberries) [Tosser Wivlov]

Just 'Flame retarded' would work :)

Michael Winner

13/02/13
6:00pm

comment on caption:
"I thought you said I was flame retarded"
"No, I said you were lame and retarded" [Tosser Wivlov]

Or are you just wistfully thinking of Thora Hird in Praise Be?

Spud Gunn

12/02/13
1:06pm

comment on caption:
Did I see you girls on Thongs of Praise? [Tosser Wivlov]

'' The one on Galway High Street , give them a call make sure there in stock , the numbers 01tree tree tree-tree tree tree-tree tree tree''

Ross Davidson

04/02/13
3:36pm

comment on caption:
You got them from M&S, which branch? [Tosser Wivlov]

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Tosser Wivlov

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