John was flabbergasted as to how he had ended up in a Monet.

20/11/11 20:13:07

George Michael had eventually made it home.

23/04/12 11:07:02

Derek enjoyed his privacy until it started to rain.

07/10/11 11:50:52

The tests having confirmed he was retarded, Peter decided to end his life by putting his head in the oven.

09/01/12 2:00:12

"Yeah Doc, I'm gonna need you to take out that catheter..."

20/04/12 22:31:41

This is why you shouldn't look in your hankerchief after you sneeze.

11/03/12 14:12:28

Unfortunately, Dave was being bothered by a squirrel who wanted his nuts.

22/02/12 11:57:11

A scene from Die Hard 10.

11/11/11 21:33:54

The Nirvana baby ten years later.

15/02/12 11:10:18

Marcus decided to return his Chinese take-away as he felt it was a little undercooked.

21/11/11 13:34:11

The prostitutes code for 'diarrhoea'.

13/11/11 11:18:00

Syriasly good dress sense.

19/10/11 18:46:07

It was not clear as to whether the bird was attracted to the snack in her hands or her unwashed fingers from the previous night's passion with Lucy.

22/09/11 11:05:52

"You don't scare me, because inside, I know each of you is just a little chicken."

26/02/12 22:35:53

Sarah was distracted mid-yawn by the sight of the cruise ship's Italian captain tripping and falling overboard into one of the life-boats.

07/02/12 21:29:16

"Do you think we should have put Glitter in more cement Tommy?".

18/10/11 15:27:41

Mi6 Bagpuss leaned eagerly forward to read another Craig Eddie caption.

06/10/11 15:52:47

Keith gazed up at all the stars in the sky and contemplated the vastness of the universe, and in that moment, his erection felt completely insignificant.

03/10/11 13:45:07

Scuba diver's capture a rare glimpse of Cher.

23/11/11 22:37:06

"You get your period this way to??".

27/10/11 20:06:13

All the other drivers got off the road when they saw it was a woman behind the wheel.

02/10/11 14:02:33

The Doberman watched...and waited.

07/09/11 22:55:32

The cyclists then witnessed the drowning of the man in the white shirt who had cast his line too early.

11/08/11 11:38:58

After contracting Herbies, Krissy felt all alone in the world.

25/07/11 15:04:57

Jane made sure all the boys at her party washed their hands.

19/06/11 12:51:29

If you hit me at below 30mph, there is an 80% chance I'll live. If you hit me at above 30mph, there is an 80% chance I'll die. Please stop trying to hit me.

14/06/11 17:27:20

Surrounded by the natural beauty, Helen was still painfully aware that she needed to see the chiropractor.

26/05/11 11:04:17

"Goodnight Tim."
"Goodnight Mrs. Burton."

14/02/11 16:18:58

Mrs. Fritzl makes an unwelcome discovery.

07/02/11 17:16:41

Craig was loath to tell the newly-weds that it was in fact his erection that was holding up the bride's train.

22/03/12 23:35:16

"'Course we had sex with them first."

06/03/12 21:34:12

Not to be outdone, Jesus sent along a shark.

09/02/12 20:50:40

John had problems enough burning the candle at one end.

06/12/11 16:15:11

6th August 1945: The last holiday snap from Pingu's 'Hiroshima' album.

03/12/11 0:54:15

The Old Man And The Sea.

02/11/11 22:41:07

Surely there is mortar life than this.

20/10/11 20:50:56

Being short on writing utensils and anxious to avoid the police response, Marv slid his breakfast across the counter to convey what he wanted to the bank clerk.

17/10/11 16:20:55

Two Bikes, One Cyclist.

10/10/11 14:47:59

Palm Pilot.

21/09/11 11:20:37

Anyone who believed it was real was a complete coffee or tea drinking receptacle.

21/09/11 11:19:58

"Excuse me, I'm embarrassed to ask, but I'm hungry you know...and I smelt fish.".

21/09/11 0:21:00

"And these two once shared a cup.".

17/09/11 16:42:15

"If I hear 'He's not the Messiah...' one more time..."

21/08/11 12:00:37

£50 is a lot of money for one corny line.

21/06/11 14:00:57

"I told you PC Dimbleby, don't feed the birds!! It only encourages them."

22/03/11 20:46:25

This is the reason for the rarity of the female orgasm.

03/03/11 21:54:35

The guy in the yellow biking suit began to wish he had laid down with the others.

22/02/11 23:29:16

A rare portrait of Jabba the Hutt's mother.

05/04/12 15:08:00

The joke was on Doreen as the gate had been open the whole time.

03/04/12 1:02:02

"Now, how do I remove red-eye?"

03/04/12 1:01:24