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Chris Keegan Vote score: 551Chris Keegan

Apparently she was looking forward to a roll over with some bloke called Camelot

Fri 20:12:42

 
Pete  Vote score: 16705Pete

Madame Flutterbuy.

Fri 21:20:10

 
Neil Mackenzie Vote score: 7997Neil Mackenzie

I've only sold two church raffle tickets.
Don't worry I'm sure this Chapel buy some.

Sat 7:22:43

 
Andrea Ivey Vote score: 729Andrea Ivey

Everything was ticketyboo

Fri 21:20:21

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 25266Tony Edwards

"I am pleased to inform you that you have won a night with me."

Fri 21:08:26

 
John  Glover Vote score: 16296John Glover

"It's almost certain you won't win, but just think of the good causes you will help."

Fri 20:33:20

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 4149Vanessa the Guesser

"Wanna win a luxury funeral?"
"Thanks dear, I've just had a bit of a coffin fit."

Fri 21:24:04

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 25266Tony Edwards

All the ladies would love to win 'The Big One.'

Fri 20:58:12

 
Vanessa  the Guesser Vote score: 4149Vanessa the Guesser

Mangy tout

Fri 20:42:48

 
Michael Winner Vote score: 19630Michael Winner

"The winner gets a hospital bed."

Fri 20:22:52

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 25266Tony Edwards

Lucky Heather

Fri 20:08:55

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 3669Mr Dome

I take it this is not an advert for Oral B...?

Fri 20:05:34

 
Chris Keegan Vote score: 551Chris Keegan

How low can a bent ticket tout go? Betty had just paid a small fortune on tickets to see Spurs in the cup final this year..

Fri 21:06:46

 
Vivvy En Vote score: 2043Vivvy En

"You'd better buy all these tickets, lady, or I'll tell your husband you just had a threesome with Senor y Senora Blanco, here."

Fri 20:53:43

 
Pete  Vote score: 16705Pete

"Buy a ticket or your number's up, sister."

Fri 20:47:43

 
John Llamas Vote score: 18326John Llamas

Times have been hard for ‘vinegar Tits’ since Prisoner Cell Block H

Fri 20:45:22

 
John  Glover Vote score: 16296John Glover

"So, you don't have an addiction. I found these underneath the ten packets of paracetamol, that were covered by the six bottles of Vodka, beside the box of old betting slips and lord knows how many unpaid parking fines acrued outside the Mecca bingo hall."

Fri 20:44:34

 
Tony Edwards Vote score: 25266Tony Edwards

Rose wishes the lady luck, through gritted teeth.

Fri 20:34:30

 
Spycenwolf  Vote score: 352Spycenwolf

"That's quite a nice scarf you have there. It'd be a shame if something happened to it because you bought less than twenty tickets for the tombola at Little Donnie's school."

Fri 20:32:32

 
Glyn Evans Vote score: 4303Glyn Evans

"If you scratch my pack, I'll scratch yours."

Fri 20:08:54

 
Mr Dome  Vote score: 3669Mr Dome

Bulldog clip x2

Fri 20:06:12

 
ant man Vote score: 404ant man

Pauline's pension plan was guaranteed, she boasted.

Fri 20:01:13

 
ant man Vote score: 404ant man

I've got a lotto luck. I'm Irish.

Fri 20:00:20

 
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